I love most “there are two types of people” jokes. You can search the web for list after list of these. I would give you some links but joke lists have a tendency to go south. They either add annoying ads or they collect a bunch of raunchy or otherwise offensive jokes. So I’d rather not be associated with any of them forever. My favorite two-types-of-people joke is:
There are 10 types of people;
those who understand the binary system and those who don’t.
I was led to this topic by an observation during my daily commute. I leave my house at 6:00 am. It’s a 20 minute drive, and I have to be at work by 7:30. I know; the math doesn’t work. The primary reason I leave so early is to avoid sitting in traffic. If I tried to arrive at 7:30, I’d have to leave at 6:50 and drive in heavy traffic. My daily ride tells me that:
There are two types of people on the road at 6:00 am;
those who want to be early and those who are already late.
I don’t like being late…for anything.
That’s a hereditary thing. My father was never late for anything. Ever. I worked a few summers at the same Post Office that he worked in. I usually worked some weird split-shift scenario and he worked 6:30 am – 3:30 pm. Once in a while, I would be scheduled to carry the route for a regular mailman who was going to be on vacation and I’d get that 6:30-3:30 shift. So, I could ride with my dad. The first time this happened, he woke me up at 5:30 complaining that “we have to leave soon!” He started work at 6:30, but he arrived at the Post Office at 6:00. He considered himself late at 6:01.
Being early for work isn’t bad. Like my dad, I enjoy starting the day in a leisurely fashion and I can get a lot of things done before most of my coworkers arrive. Being early for things today is easier than it was 40 years ago. If you’re early, you can catch up on email, read the news, read a blog post or two, or Dilbert, or whatever. That leads me to another observation:
I know lot of people with smart phone, primarily iPhones, who use it as a phone, texting and email platform with a camera. I want to ask “have you heard about these things called apps?” but I figure if it works for them, who am I to be concerned? I, on the other hand, love my apps. If have tons of apps, some of which I don’t use very often, but some I use every day. Since Top-10 lists are all the rage, here are my Top-10 iPhone apps:
- Evernote – Taking and organizing notes just can get any easier. I have hundreds of ideas for this blog in Evernote (sorry if that depresses you). If I see something interesting, I can quickly pull up the note and add to it. When I get enough stuff to scribble 800-1,000 words, we’re off to press.
- WordPress – If you have a blog on WP, and a smart phone, get this app.
- Jot – Without this app, you would never see the classy little illustrations that often accompany this blog. I also use it for work, drawing flowcharts, screen designs and such.
- ESPN Sportscenter / MLB At Bat – The best thing about these apps is that the let me be an engaged fan of Pittsburgh sports teams while living in New England.
- Travel apps (Marriott, Delta, Southwest & AMTRAK) – These are all good, but I do think Marriott’s are the best. On my last trip, I forgot to ask for an extra blanket before leaving for a long day of meetings. I opened the app – went to ‘Linens’ – Clicked to add one blanket and I returned to a room with the bed made up with an extra blanket.
- Google Maps – I have a Garmin GPS in my car that I love, but I really like Google Maps when I am walking.
- Vine – It’s amazing how much information you can convey in a 6-second video.
- Pool – Oh my goodness, this free simple little pool game, is, Ah-dictive. Seriously, get this game. This just in – they just added a 9-Ball version. Free never felt so good.
- 1Password – The best part of this app is that I also have a version on my laptop, my iPad and my MacBook (yes, I am a geek) so I’m never without my passwords.
- (Our) 411 – I’m including this app on the list because I wrote it. Don’t worry, I’m not asking you to buy a copy, in fact, it’s an ‘enterprise app’ so you can’t have a copy unless you and I work together. I like this app because it holds all that stuff I never remember like the code to the file room and my boss’s cell phone number.
I’ll leave you with a slight variation on a two-types-of-people joke:
Women have two types of clothing;
clean and dirty.
Men have three types;
clean, dirty and the things you have to smell before wearing.
I put that in last because I think my editor just threw up.