One-Liner Wednesday – Monopoly

We call this a trend that isn’t correcting itself

One Liner WednesdayThose are the final words in a Twitter stream ignited when one of my friends suggested that, perhaps the new Ultimate Banking edition of Monopoly would help end the chronic mistakes made by yours truly during games. This soon-to-be-released edition will use debit cards and an ATM to control the flow of funds during the game. Excuse me, but that’s just stupid.

Seriously Hasbro?

Debit cards and an ATM?

Where’s the fun in that?

The whole reason for playing a board game is to step away from the technology that drives our lives. Granted, the only reason my friend knows that I sometimes confuse the bank’s money with my money is that my daughter Tweets about it, but that’s part of the fun. Otherwise her tweet would be:

Monopoly’s master computer has declared me to be the winner…yay

Board games are meant to be played with people in charge, not computers. If we want to put our fines and taxes in the center of the board and let the first person to land on Free Parking claim it, that’s our choice. It is our choice, by the way. I’ve played with Free Parking money since my brother first cheated me out of my money taught me how to play the game in the 1960s. He didn’t really cheat, he just revealed the rules slowly and opportunistically. He also revealed a few rules that didn’t exist, but that’s what older brothers do. To this day, I don’t know if you can really collect rent while languishing in Jail.

My daughter plays Monopoly like her mother, with her money in neat little denominationally-restricted stacks, carefully and uniformly inserted halfway under the edge of the board. I put all my money in a heap. I put all my property in a heap too, along with the odd Get Out of Jail Free card. Every now and then, my wife will organize my money into stacks. It doesn’t last long. Within the space of a few transactions, there’s a pile again.

The debit cards would eliminate both methods. They would also eliminate the practice of letting your opponent buy US Steel a.k.a. Pacific Ave (we play the Pittsburgh edition) and pay for it after passing GO. They would also eliminate me as banker. There is no banker. The machine is the banker. In other words, the Ultimate Banking edition is Monopoly with all the fun sucked out of it.

This post is part of Linda G. Hill’s One-Liner Wednesday series. If you’re not familiar with that, please slip on over to her site and join the fun.

59 thoughts on “One-Liner Wednesday – Monopoly

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  1. I think, Dan, that you would agree that I am a “little bit” competitive. I brought my four children up in the same manner. I never let my children win and they pass this technique on into their families! As a consequence of this, Monopoly is a banned activity in the Pennington household – always has been and always will be. Hence, Bankers and ATMs is a DIGAF for me – grin – and if you know what DIGAF is, then don’t tell!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I don’t play Monopoly anymore, because I’m not with the greedy capitalist I dated in college anymore, but when I did play, I always had neatly stacked money. I always lost, too. (Not sure if math, skill, or because of neatly stacked money.) Still I’m wondering if there’s a Hoosier version…

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Faith almost always wins, so I don’t think it’s the neat money. There are tons of versions. They stopped making the Pittsburgh version (replaced with a Pittsburgh Steelers version) but Faith loves Eat’n Park, soooo. I found this on eBay for her a few years ago for Christmas. I think Monopoly comes down to who owns the railroads.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Monopoly: the game that encourages everyone to be just like all the people we’ve been told are ruining the world; you can buy your way out of jail, be a slum landlord and get rewarded for it and get rich quick by building hotels nobody is ever going to use.

    Liked by 2 people

        1. It’s part of the two-property set right after GO. Actually, in the Pittsburgh edition, it’s Three Rivers Stadium and The Civic Arena – both long-since-demolished sports venues that had been constructed in traditionally poor neighborhoods. Rent is $2 and $4 while unimproved.

          Liked by 1 person

  4. I’m with you. I want paper money and all debts go into the middle and when you land on free parking well, you win the lotto. Neat stacks. One of my brothers played with one stack which was infuriating because you didn’t know what he had. We never let him be banker.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I always get asked to be the banker, despite the allegations of corruption and embezzlement. I guess it makes the game seem more real. Thanks for standing on the side of right (paper money).

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    1. Seriously, I don’t know why they want to “improve” something that has worked so well forever. Neat piles, pfffft, such a bother. I always end up rooting through the pile to find my rent, but I like it better.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Agreed, Dan. I’m a device hound, but playing a board or card game seems like one time when you can and should be able to unplug. I guess they feel the need to “update” and not be overlooked in a videogame-obsessed world, but I don’t like anything that makes it hard, if not impossible, to have house rules. Viva la “Free Parking” money!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yes, Viva la “Free Parking” money indeed! Plus, sooner or later, you know that the circuitry is going to go awry and then the game will be useless or you’d be printing money on your inkjet. I want to play a board game to escape.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. *sighs* Why fix something this isn’t broken? Really? So totally with you on this subject. In this house we don’t take Monopoly too seriously because each game ends with us roaring due to cats insisting on batting the pieces on the board as well as rolling around on the board, having a grand old time. Same with Scrabble. Try playing with tiles scattered all over the place. Doesn’t work. Can we protest against this new version of Monopoly?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You seem to be aligned with the consensus Amy, why fix something that works? We frequently have a game interrupted by cats, who consider the dice and the player pieces to be toys. We don’t play scrabble, but I can imagine what a mess that would be. I remember our first cats “playing” with a little toy train we had given our daughter. I guess everything is a cat toy.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Imagine um 13 cats all staring at ONE playing board. Yes, you get the idea. LOL LOL LOL Ohhhhhhhh those dice are mighty tempting indeed. We end up running after cats who have dice in mouth or who have tiles flying all over the house. Tee hee …… We have more fun interacting with our cats then actually playing games …..

        Liked by 1 person

    1. That’s why you have to add local rules and deals and swaps. If that doesn’t work, let the cats invade the board. I enjoy playing the Pittsburgh edition much more than the regular edition because it adds that element of local flavor – like when my daughter HAS to own Eat’n Park. Or the fact that I don’t want to own Mellon due to a bad experience with that bank. Of course, you can always add someone who is a sore loser to the game and gang up on them during the game,

      Liked by 1 person

      1. LOL! I like the way you guys think! When #4 Daughter was young, we got a board game with action figures called Hero Quest, and we painted all the heroes to be female and made up our own rules so the heroes would always win. Then there was the board game that came with my Country Joe and the Fish album that HAD no rules. It just said something like, “It’s your game. Make up your own damn rules.”

        Liked by 1 person

  7. We love board games, and play them every time we’re all together, or all home and bored. We have the New York version or original with Park Ave, and B&O railroad. We don’t play it too often. I never win, my son almost always wins, and I keep my money like Faith and your Mrs. in neat stacks sorted by denomination.

    I’ve never looked for a Silicon Valley version but I think there was one.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Neat stacks seem to be winning over my pile. I rarely win. I might do better in the regular edition than the Pittsburgh one, less brand loyalty to deal with. If there is a silicon Valley edition, I’m guessing Apple would be in the Boardwalk group? That would be pretty cool.

      I had to teach Faith Monopoly early, because she was kicking my butt at Sorry.

      Liked by 1 person

        1. It’s amazing how disingenuous “Sorry” can be made to sound while kicking your opponent’s little guy onto the floor. My wife and I once played a game of Backgammon where we took every opportunity to hit the other person, even when not in our best interest. The game took forever!

          I had to look up Mexican Train. I may have to suggest that during the next get together.

          Liked by 1 person

          1. LOL! Or just down right mad scientist evil accompanied with a matching laugh. It’s been know to happen at our house from time to time. :)
            The guys usually gang up on the gals, conspiracy thoughts abound as to how my son almost always wins, and me with the worst math skills in the family am always made score keeper- it’s because I’m usually out first I think. :)

            Mexican Train is really fun, and frustrating! A whine you hear a lot while playing is,” is anyone going to open the Mexican Train?” It’s a way of getting back in the game when you’re unable to play on your own tiles.
            It’s our “go-to” family game when we’re all together. Followed by Sorry!

            Liked by 1 person

    1. I wish they would just leave it alone. It’s like when they made Battleship electronic. The old plastic version from the 60s would still work today. The electronic version probably broke inside of two years.

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  8. I vote for the “Keep it as is” option. I used to play lots of games but have a bit of trouble a) being competitive and b) winning a lot. So I don’t play much any more. We played a lot when the girls were younger and still play Scrabble and Upwords, but often just for fun.

    janet

    Liked by 1 person

  9. If we play I would let you be the banker…. I was a real one for several years and it is not as fun a playing Monopoly. I also make nice neat piles, I got brainwashed that way at the bank… but I am really good and making sure that amount you have hidden under the board is found and accounted for!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks! You’re probably pretty good at making sure that, when you buy a property, that I put the money in the bank and not on top of my pile, too. I think that’s what started this whole twitter stream.

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  10. I couldn’t agree with you more! Had to read this after your comment about it on today’s post :-) certainly a little more than a one-liner but I can tell you had to let it out! I wish they wouldn’t mess with the classics! It may not surprise you that I’m a line the money up sorted in piles type of person too. Although not under the edge of the board – I may have to steal that idea!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. I’m so glad you included that photo and caption about your wife straightening up your money, because when I saw the photo labelled “My pile”, I have to admit that I had planned to give you a ribbing about it. Didn’t you get marks for “neatness” in school, Dan? Neatness! Even with a pile (no matter how meager) of $$$! Lol! I can’t even stand to have bills in my wallet that are upside down or flipped over. I’m always re-sorting it so it’s all oriented the same way. I’m not OCD, I swear. #Much ;P

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Let’s say that I did get comments about neatness. They might not have been the same ones my wife or you got but I did get them. Every time we play, she gets to s point where she can’t stand looking at the pile and she organizes it. It never lasts long

      The cash in my wallet is organized and properly faced.

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  12. In my mind, there are board games and there are other games. Board games are where you use your mind to add that money up and not an app. My ten-year old grandson is a big video gamer but he loves Monopoly and no one else in the family will play with him except me. He has beaten everyone numerous times and is quite proud of that fact. Monopoly is Monopoly – leave it be. :-)

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Such wisdom in “The whole reason for playing a board game is to step away from the technology that drives our lives.” My mother wouldn’t play monopoly with us unless we all agreed to let the phone ring if someone called and to turn off the TV. I shudder to picture her reaction to an ATM and debit cards.

    Liked by 1 person

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