Busy and Busted

socs badge 2016-17I’ve been promising the voices in my head that they could have a crack at Linda G. Hill’s SoCS prompt. They were pretty mad at me when I co-opted the prompt for a bar conversation last week. I’m going to give today’s prompt to them, but I’m not sure where we’re heading.

Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “bus.” Use it as it is, or find a word with the letters “bus” in it. Have fun!

Bus? Seriously, that’s the prompt you’re giving us? If you don’t mind us saying so, it seems like you’re dumping something on us that you don’t want. Hey, guess what, it doesn’t matter if you do mind us saying so, you aren’t allowed to edit this, so take that.

It’s been a very busy week at work. Like most people in small businesses, I wear a few hats. One of them, the large hat, is involved with technology. I’ve been working on a mobile App for our customers. When I work on Apps – you know, I’m not really sure ‘App’ should be capitalized. It probably shouldn’t be, but “app” looks kinda dumb. The capital ‘A’ adds an air of importance, extends a kind of dignity to an otherwise ho-hum thing. I spend a lot of time building these apps and I don’t like to think that I’m working on ho-humery. Microsoft Word doesn’t seem to care if I use ‘App’ or ‘app’ but it clearly doesn’t like ‘humery’.

What do they know?

They also don’t like ‘kinda’ and, while ‘kinda’ is kind of an inappropriate contraction, you will find it in a few online dictionaries. Yes, I know: “online dictionaries and online grammar-reference sites are not to be trusted” That’s my editor talking, and she’s talking about you, Grammar Girl.

Anyway, back to the apps I work on, the ones for our employees are all iOS apps, i.e. apps for Apple devices. Apple needs to be capitalized, ‘cuz, you know, Apple. Maybe that’s how we got ‘Apps’ in the first place. Apple was the first smartphone vendor – I know, I know, the phones aren’t smart – they gave us apps.

OK, I looked this up. According to some omnibus site for spelling, ‘App’ should only be capitalized when it’s the first word in a sentence, and the scholars who answered this question suggested writing out ‘application’ instead of ‘app’.

What do they know.

Apps aren’t applications; they’re smaller. Apps are applications in the way that putting a Band-Aid on a papercut is performing first aid. Apps are tiny. Applications are big and complex. Apps tend to do one thing. Applications typically do many things. I develop applications too. That’s another hat that I wear.

In this case, the case of the app I was working on, it’s a webapp. Oooh, Word does not like webapp. It also doesn’t like oooh, but I needed more ‘ooo’ than ‘oo’ provided, so I’m sticking with it. Wikipedia defines ‘webapp’ as follows:

In computing, a web application or web app is a client–server software application in which the client (or user interface) runs in a web browser.”

What do they know.

I know, Wikipedia is in the same not-to-be-trusted pool as Grammar Girl. In this case, I agree. In my case, ‘webapp’ refers to an app that runs in a browser but can also kinda/sorta (yeah, yeah kind of / sort of)…sheesh…be installed on your phone. It doesn’t have to be some fancy-schmancy client-server thingie. I write those too; I know what I’m talking about.

However, long before I even started working on the app/App/WebApp/webapp/thingie – I’m going to go with ‘thingie’ from now on. Before I started working on the phone thingie, my week was bad.

I came in bright and early Monday morning, only to find that the coffee maker was busted. Technically, it was leaking, but there’s no ‘bus’ in leaking. I called the coffee maker people and I had a most unpleasant conversation:

Defibrillator
This can wait

Hi, we need service for our coffee maker.”

What’s wrong with it?

The water line going into the filter is leaking.”

OK, we will have someone out there within 48 hours.”

48 hours?!?!

That’s our standard service window.”

That’s crazy talk. 48 hours is fine for a Fax machine or a copier or for that defibrillator thingie, but this is a CAW-FEE-MAKE-ERR – we can’t go 48 hours without coffee!

I had to go out and buy Box o’Joes. Note: Box o’Joes are boxes of Dunkin Donuts coffee. Otherwise, I could be accused of abusing our employees.

After securing the Box o’Joes, I noticed that the refrigerator was also leaking. It was an appliance conspiracy.

I don’t know what was wrong with the fridge. Someone suggested that construction workers may have de-energized the power bus.

I work with engineers. They talk like that. I would have said “turned off the breaker” but…

The bottom of the fridge was full of slush. The ice in the ice-maker tray had melted and frozen into a blobish thing. The stuff in the freezer and fridge was all wet with condensation, but both compartments were cold. I told people that they might want to throw their food out, but most ignored me. I guess having no coffee and no food was too much to bear.

Dishwaser
I don’t trust this guy

By Wednesday, we had coffee, ice and cold food, but I didn’t like the way the dishwasher was looking at me.

77 thoughts on “Busy and Busted

Add yours

  1. Don’t kid yourself – appliances DO talk to each other. I redid my kitchen 6 years ago, this past winter the dish washer quit, when that was fixed – the frig died and the coffee pot petered out. I’m holding my breath on the oven, toaster and can opener now!!

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I kinda sorta love this post. Kinda. Sorta. I’m glad you got all of your thingies (one of my fave words) fixed. I’m only disappointed that you didn’t use “whatchamacallit” in a sentence. No bonus points today, Dan, but this is a marvelous post.

    Liked by 2 people

      1. I thought it was Thang…it’s your Thang, do what you want to do.

        Sorry if I’m not jiggy wit it, I use “thingie” all the time when I don’t know the actual technical name for something. It works for me! ;-)

        Like

  3. 48 hours without coffee?!? You bet your App that’s unacceptable. Good of you to BUSt that up with a DD delivery, Dan. I’m sure the freezer is smiling now — and so are your colleagues.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Some weeks are just like that … but when the coffee maker turns on you, you know it’s going to be a rough ride.

    My year long issue with rebellious appliances isn’t over yet. I FINALLY have functioning A/C in my car again after sweating it out since the end of July. Of course the weather has now changed … and guess what? Tried to turn on the gas fireplace this morning to take the chill out of the air.
    Nothing. Nada.

    Sigh. Hoping a simple solution like a change of batteries is all it needs.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Joanne. The microwave and the toaster ganged up on us earlier in the year, but you can live without them for a little while. No coffee in an office, and it’s just not going to be a good day. Plus, although we’re still in the midst of a drought, it was pouring the day the coffee maker died.

      I hope your fireplace isn’t taking its turn behind the A/C unit for some TLC.

      Like

  5. They’re called appliances because they’re apps with alliances — client/server interfaces with a poor definition of who’s serving whom and a networked suicide pact. Why, yes, I do write science fiction and fantasy — Why do you ask?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Nicely done there, Marian! Oh, they know who’s serving whom, alright. They can tell time, read calendars and plan and scheme. At least the coffee maker had the compassion not to flood the kitchen. When the ice maker went south, the line started leaking after the cleaning crew left on Friday. We walked into a kitchen full of water and the realization that we had flooded our neighbors below us and below them, the following Monday.

      Like

  6. Having my first cuppa before I run out the door to head north-east to see what migrants (Birds) are showing up early for Winter, and read this while eating a quickie breakfast with said cuppa.
    Loved this line, “construction workers may have de-energized the power bus.” Hahaha!

    I nearly snorted my tea through my nose a coupla times! I’m sorry your week was bad, but it sure is funny the way you tell it.

    Hoping your week-end is much better!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I hold my breath as I write this. My appliances are all the same age. I have this feeling when one starts going, the others will follow suit. And to go without coffee for 48 hours is insane. What are those people thinking? Loved your sense of humor and your contractions and yeah, spellcheck is a real bummer, especially when I retype the same word I want not what spellcheck wants several times before spellcheck gives up. I really enjoy the way you “talk” so don’t let spellcheck win!!! :)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Spellcheck will never win, Amy. But, those appliances…beware. If I were you, I owuldn’t go in there in the dark. For the record, my wife has made coffee on the wood stove during a power failure, so we’re good here.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. We don’t have a wood stove unfortunately. If desperate enough we do have instant coffee in with the camping supplies that we could possibly use with hot water that was heated on the camper stove. Our appliances if I told you how old, I don’t think you would believe me cause things just are not made like they used to. It pays to hang on to what you have …. And by gosh we did. But even those have a deadline to meet. LOL You know the saying … When it rains it pours. I am NOT looking forward to that day …..
        As for spellcheck, right on!! It won’t win with me either! :)

        Liked by 1 person

  8. Yes, household appliances conspire with each other. I know mine do, I did a post on it (twice, as a matter of fact, thank heavens the computer stayed out of the conspiracy?): https://cordeliasmomstill.com/2015/07/13/houses-and-other-needy-things-re-blog/

    Your post is great, Dan. I’m still chuckling. I don’t do Linda’s stream of consciousness challenge mostly because I’d have to be conscious in order to have that stream. I’m definitely not up to witty writing first thing on a Saturday morning. (ooooo, maybe I could start a Witty Writing challenge – then I could simply re-blog everyone else’s posts and stay unconscious longer!)

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Ha! Oh, you people and your coffee! I do like tea (though I could live without it if I had to) but I’ve never been a coffee drinker. I have a jar of instant decaf in the cupboard that will last years (notice that it’s multiple — yearS) for those times when I inexplicably have a craving for it. Usually I only end up drinking 1/2 – 2/3 of the cup. The craving is very easy to satisfy. Heck, I don’t even OWN a coffee maker! O_o If I say “I’m going out for coffee” with a friend, you can assume that I’m using “coffee” as an umbrella term for “a hot drink”. I WILL drink it, of course, but there are so many better tasting things out there! Hmm, I drink practically no coffee OR alcohol…?… I can feel the eyes burning holes in me already! xD

    Liked by 1 person

    1. No burning eyes, Wendy. You’re entitled to your taste (says a cold, fizzy Pepsi drinker). In fact, you may be healthier as a result. As for me, I like a few cups of coffee in the am. I also like something with alcohol, from time to time. I could probably go without alcohol longer than coffee. I think that’s probably a good thing.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks John. I think you’re right, now that dishwashers and refrigerators and coffee makers, of all things, include motherboards in their parts lists. I actually felt good about the fact that this was a simple mechanical plumbing problem.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. I love that last line about the dishwasher :D Please don’t worry about grammar on Stream of Consciousness Saturday. This is supposed to be a post where we don’t have to correct everything. The dictionary does not keep up with popular slang and computer jargon but you may see the slang word(s) incorporated into the lexicon at a later date. Did I just say that, yikes my brain is going to explode now. I think app did originate with Apple Computers but I could be wrong.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. No, I love #SoCS. I don’t do them as often as I used to because I also have my bar conversations on Saturday. I try to do them for the prompt, but, usually, I have to edit the dialog because I mess up the tense or something,

      Liked by 1 person

  11. AHAHAHAHA! Your SoCS was super funny today! Thanks for the laugh! I enjoyed it tremendously! :)
    I’m heading back to the CAW-FEE-MAKE-ERR so I can finish up reading, then I gotta clean stuffs. :/

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Love it, Dan!! Your creative SOCs thingies are a hoot to read! Appliances do talk, and my LGs sing! Really! You’ve got your bus-y fingers in every aspect of your office! Apps, appliances, computers, and trips to Dunkin’ Donuts! Boss of the year material with a designated parking spot! 💛 Christine

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Never once in all the years I started my day by going to the teachers’ lounge for a cup of coffee did anyone take the initiative to do anything if the coffee maker didn’t work. We just told the principal who was too busy to do anything immediately and then went around all day being snarky. I don’t think they pay you enough.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ha ha. I’ll pass that on to my boss. Right after he gave the budget for these things to me, the refrigerator died. I was all: “what? I have to go buy a new one?” Managing the budget is easy. Sopping up the water, not so much.

      Liked by 1 person

    2. My earlier comment was from my phone, where the ‘Send’ button is too close to the Enter key. I wanted to add that, the thought of teaching without having had coffee is a little scary to me :)

      Like

    1. Some were suggesting that we should add ‘coffee status’ to the alert system we use to tell people about weather and power related office closings. Somewhat worse wast the fact that I had stopped at Dunkin Donuts on my way in…so I was fine.

      Like

  14. Ahha! You got the new update too. You probably know this but I’ll tell you anyway. That update was to bring Windows 10 up to the Anniversary Edition of Windows 10. Microsoft didn’t ask if we wanted it, and didn’t let us decide when a good time to install it was. They assumed they knew better than all of us. They gave me a way to give feedback, the fools. Boy, did I give it to them.

    I do use Wikipedia, knowing full well that it isn’t accurate, but then, none of the other ones are completely accurate either. Things change too fast for that. Grammar is something that is also kind of subjective. I use what I learned in school for the most part.

    Do you remember those days when a coffee maker wasn’t on of the items in a work environment, let along a frig and a dishwasher?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for the info. I wasn’t aware that I wanted the Anniversary Edition. I thought I wanted to get some work done after mopping the kitchen floor.

      I think I have always worked in a place that had coffee. Techies have always had a thing for coffee. Refrigerators, microwaves, toasters and dishwashers are unique (for me) to this job. Then again, we hold catered meetings here, and we serve food on china and stuff like that, so…

      I’m sure the dishwasher will cash it in right after one of those meetings. My wife (editor) relies on old-school knowledge of grammar. she paid better attention than I did.

      Liked by 1 person

  15. I’m going back to work tomorrow after a week of holiday. I’m afraid now ;-). However, I only pack bread and rolls and am more or less helpful to customers ….. No appthingie, fridge or dishwasher to worry about :-). Hope next week will be better for you!

    Liked by 1 person

  16. I loved the photos including the note on the coffeemaker! I do agree with idea of electrical appliances conspiring against us. My friend’s washer and dryer broke down on the same day. I remember when I had a job at a nursing home and the ice maker all broke down or busted on the same day. Not the refrigerators or freezers but the separate entity called an ice maker. No more technical language I can come up with. But instead of Apes, instead of Zombies or Attack of the Computers or Robots, I think good old appliances will be the unexpected takeover of the world, Dan. :D

    Like

Add your thoughts. Start or join the discussion. Sadly, links require moderation.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑

%d bloggers like this: