Bear with me as I turn this show over to the voices in my head. They’ve been cooped up for several weeks but today’s SoCS prompt seems like one
I can trust to them at which they will excel. Oh, I guess they’re in control. Now that we got him to shut up, let’s take a closer look at the prompt.
Dan has a tendency to pick on Linda for giving us these prompts, but we LOVE Linda! Linda gives us our shot. It’s the only time he drops those “you shouldn’t say that” “that doesn’t make sense” “why are you going there?” and that whole “OK, let me see if I can make this, shorter, more succinct, better and stuff.” Seriously, he’s cringing because we ended that sentence with ‘and stuff’ but you know what we mean. People talk like that. People might not always use the polite form of ‘stuff’ either. You know the other form. It starts with the same letter and, in this context would mean ‘stuff’ so, stuff.
Anyway, Linda says:
Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “bear/bare.” Use one, use both, use ’em any way you please. Have fun!
Dan thought that was a good prompt, because he took a bunch of pictures of bare trees recently while walking Maddie. That’s fine, but what about the other bare? You know, the bear bear. How are we going to work that in.
There’s a way to work that in if we weren’t constrained to use the polite form of ‘stuff’. You know, the expression about bears and stuff and woods. There’s also the juxtaposed version of that statement that involves the bear being Catholic and the Pope doing the bear thing. Actually, we’re not sure that’s juxtaposition. We don’t think it’s a malapropism, ‘cuz ‘bear’ and ‘Pope’ don’t sound similar. It might be solecism, except it’s intentional and it’s not really grammatical, but it’s certainly a breach of good manners. Well, it would be if we actually used it, but…the editor.
In any case, one of those grammar hounds in the audience will clue us into the right word. The vague reference to the editor is because, if we explained the expression with the bear and the Pope, she would derail this post. By the way, when she derails an SoCS post, it’s cancelled, not edited, ‘cuz Linda says: “no edits.” Fortunately, Linda also makes that “don’t give in an inordinate amount of thought to these posts” suggestion, which is an area where Dan has been told he really shines.
Now that we’ve given the bear his time in the spotlight, let’s head back to those bare trees. The interesting thing about the bare trees is the number of critters that call them home. In fact, the very thing that made them bare is what makes the homes possible. The squirrels gather up a squirrel-ton of leaves and twigs, haul them back into the tree and build elaborate nests. It always amazes me that they put them pretty high up in the tree, and they put them on branches that are small enough to move in the wind.
I think they know something about structural mechanics. I don’t want to get sciency or mathy, ‘cuz Joey, Mary, Judy and Marian, but if they built that nest on a sturdy, non-move-in-the-wind branch, the wind would probably destroy the nest. This way, everything moves. Still, I imagine Mr. and Mrs. Squirrel having a conversation:
“Why did you build this place on such a flimsy branch?”
“You know, honey, the fact that the branch sways in the wind is actually beneficial.”
“If the branch was rigid, the force of the wind could cause leaves to blow out of the nest, destroying its structural integrity.”
“Stop getting all sciency. You’re a squirrel. What do you understand about structural integrity and stuff – and, by ‘stuff’ I mean the bear stuff – ? You built it here because you like the motion. It’s like that time we snuck on the Ferris wheel at the carnival.”
“That was fun.”
“I puked. Not my idea of fun.”
“You were pregnant.”
“I’m probably gonna be pregnant before we’re done with this nest too. Did you factor that into your building plans, Einstein?”
“Trust me. This is for the best.”
We should mention that Linda does allow for correcting grammatical errors. Ironically, instead of ‘twigs’ we wrote ‘trigs’ – it must be those science-nerd voices trying to horn in on this show. In any case, whether it’s science, or the love of motion, or hiding from predators, they always build those nests high, and they almost always survive the winter. Mother Nature never seems to give them more than they can bear.
No bonus points for starting and ending with the word?