Thursday Doors – Welcome to the Neighborhood

Family, Thursday Doors 85 comments
Main Entrance – No Weapons

My mom turned 92 this week, so I thought it would be a good time to share some doors from her “neighborhood.” I put that in quotes because she lives in an apartment building that is designed for elderly folk. She’s OK with being “elderly.” In fact, she’s OK with being “old” and, she’s OK with me using these doors.

I tried explaining Thursday Doors to her. She doesn’t have Internet access, so I couldn’t show her Thursday Doors, but I told her about it. I told her how a bunch of people get together each week, link up with Norm and share pictures of doors.

She gave me that look.

I didn’t explain the deal with the Blue Frog, ‘cuz I was pretty sure that would seal the deal, as it were. If you’re not familiar with Thursday Doors, visit Norm at his place, click the Blue Frog if you want to add your doors or see all the other doors.

Make sure to look at Norm’s doors when you get to his page. My mother might not understand the Internet or Thursday Doors, but she would understand being polite and checking out Norm’s doors. “If he’s going to all that trouble for you, it’s the least you can do” – I can hear it, clear as when I was six.

The building she lives in is a non-descript apartment building. The doors are blah, but each apartment’s door sits in a little recessed area. Most residents decorate this space as if it’s their front porch. I took a couple of pictures of these. When my mom asked what I was doing, I explained and she said: “oh, then go down that way, because there are some people down there who went all out.”

When I asked her if she thought people would mind, she said that she thought they would be happy. I’m going to go with that.

The pretty doors are in the gallery. The featured door is the door to the building. I was comforted by that sign when I first went inside. My brother dropped me off so I could visit for a few hours, but I didn’t get very far. When heading to the elevator, a woman stopped me:

“Who are you?”

“I’m Dan, I’m here to see my mom.”

“Who’s you mom?”

“Betty. Up on the third floor.”

“I know Betty, but I haven’t seen you before.”

“I’m visiting from Connecticut.”

“Well, you should come more often.”

“Yeah, um…nice meeting you.”

When we were packing my mother’s stuff before moving her to Iowa, one of the things she was very concerned about was her holiday decorations. They were in a storage area, and she didn’t want us to forget them. To appease her, we emptied out the storage area before sending her to the airport for her flight. I think it’s nice of the apartment management to allow the residents to personalize their entrances. I hope you enjoy their doors.

Apartments
Lobby
I’m not sure what’s up there, but with all the walkers I saw, I don’t think the stairs get a lot of use.
The chapel is pretty close to my mom’s apartment.
Mom’s door

85 comments

  1. As we age, our world seems to get smaller and smaller and I am happy to see how the residents of the apartment enjoy adding color and individuality to their little corner of the world. One of the benefits of getting older is that you lose some of your filters and have no qualms or inhibitions about offering unsolicited advice, like the lady who suggested that you should visit your Mom more frequently.

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    1. Thanks for dropping by, Mike. You get a nice feeling as you walk down the halls of that building. I don’t know how often that lady stands guard, but I was glad I got through. She was pretty funny, but she was serious.

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  2. Happy Birthday to Mom! I chuckled while you were trying to explain Thursday doors to your mom. I tried explaining a computer and the internet a few times to my mom when she could still understand and I always got that puzzled look in return. Nice doors Dan. Thanks for sharing a little slice of your mom’s place and the decorated doors. Where mom lives, they do the same and, of course, the doors change with the seasons and holidays. It makes it a brighter and cheerier place.

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    1. Thanks Mary. It was interesting to see the different doors. Some still supporting St. Patrick’s Day, while others had already moved on to Easter. Some, my mom included, even put out candy for Halloween. It does make for a cheerful walk down the hall.

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  4. Love this visit to your Mom’s neighborhood. It looks like a warm, inviting community, and I’m sure she enjoys living there with other people in her own age bracket where she has a lot in common. Probably most of them don’t give a hoot about computers and social media.:-) A friend who is a widow decided to sell her home and move into a similar community. She loves it. She said she likes the feeling of never being alone, feels safe, and can engage in conversation or activities whenever she wants. Hope Betty has many more happy years there, and the guard is right – you can never visit Mom too often. :-)

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    1. Thanks Judy. It’s funny that you mention “her own age” as the residents refer to the people who are only in their 70’s as being the “kids” in the neighborhood. I guess is all relative. It has been a very good place for her to be.

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  7. I too laughed at your conversation about Thursday Doors with your mom. I get pretty much the same reaction from most people I talk to ;) I loved the implied comment “If he’s going to all that trouble for you, it’s the least you can do” :D

    I think it’s wonderful that residents are allowed to decorate their exterior space.

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    1. Thanks Joanne. It’s funny how those fundamental life lessons keep coming back under different circumstances. I think it’s very nice of the place to allow the decorations.

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      1. It seems they really understand the need for seniors to personalize their space. It’s bad enough that their world shrinks so much, there’s dignity in being allowed to control the look of your space – both inside and out.

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  9. I loved this Dan. Happy belated birthday to your Mom.
    The personal touches on those doors are what make them special. Speaking of special, that advice lady takes the cake.
    I laughed my way through your description of trying to explain our little club to outsiders:
    “So you just put up pictures of doors…and other people…they come and comment on them?”
    “Doors…”
    “Hmm…and then the other people do the same…”
    “They share their own…doors”
    “Pictures of…doors, just doors; really?”
    “Hmm”
    And I just smile and nod :-D

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    1. Thanks Norm. Yeah, Thursday Doors is hard enough to explain to Internet-savvy folks. But, my mom thought it sounded like a fun thing and quickly got into the spirit of helping me find enough doors.

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  12. She gave me that look.

    No matter how old we are, mom will always be mom.

    Dan, this is my favorite door series. Sure, it’s not great architecture but architects create great architecture. These are doors that the people who live there “create”.

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    1. Thanks Greg. Yeah,she will always be capable of giving that look. My wife has a few of those. I think my daughter might even have one or two.

      These really are special and they are the only doors I didn’t feel compelled to explain.

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  13. Happy birthday to your mom, Dan! That’s wonderful how everyone has a door space to decorate. It’s the little things like that which make a big difference in people’s lives. I’m sure it’s difficult for elderly folks to move someplace, especially to an apartment if they’re used to a house, but this lets them maintain a certain level of public individuality and identity, and I think that’s fantastic.

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    1. Thanks Wendy. She enjoys her independence, and she’s always been one for individual expression. Sometimes, especially while growing up, that could be hard to deal with, but this is an important outlet for her.

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  15. That’s wonderful, Dan. I hope your dear mother has a memorable and special birthday. She deserves it. Of course, she already has the best son, so what more can she ask for, right? Glad her door decorations are safe and sound!

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  17. Wonderful! I’ve been to several of these types of places, and I must say, personalizing the space seems to be a big event. Many of the old or elderly are as determined to make a statement as any student in a dorm would be. People are people :) Fun is fun :)
    I’m glad your mother is still celebrating birthdays and that you got to visit!

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    1. I remember not being able to have anything attached to our dorm room door. It did seem to leave the hallway looking very much drab. Being an individual is important, and, as you said, fun if fun.

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      1. That’s kinda sad.
        We had all matter of decor. Most importantly dry erase boards with markers tied to them.
        I was on the welcoming committee for two years, made all the name tags, so to speak. Then people would come in, wrap their doors in whatever paper, cover them with posters or comics. Some didn’t. Some left the name tags up for the year and some liked naked doors — but most decorated.

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  18. Happy birthday to your mom, Dan. It was nice of you to share the doors. Reminds me a bit of dorm doors from my high school and college days. One end of life and another, eh? Nice of you to visit, too, (even if it’s not often enough.) :-)

    janet

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    1. Thanks Janet. I will get back out there. I remember reading articles last year about kids decorating their school lockers. I guess we never lose the desire to be an individual.

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  20. My mother decorated her doorway with a birdhouse that was decorated like a beach shack and had a sign that read “Happy Hour All Day Long.” She turns 91 next month – and we’re very happy she’s in a safe and warm place. With a bar, of course.

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  22. When we go to New Jersey, we visit family in a similar building. Everyone decorated their doors in the same way. They also have benches and chairs in the corridors, especially next to the elevator. The only thing I don’t see in your pictures are the hand rails on the wall. I might have thought your mother was in NJ, but I remember your layover in Iowa.

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  23. Your mother seems to live at a nice place, where they try to make the ones who live there, feel at home. Great to go with you through these halls and see all the different decorations on the doors.
    Am chuckling throughout this post, because of the generational differences. People who don’t blog, think the ones who do are nuts! I’m up in the years that people wonder if I am (nuts) when I mention I have a blog, and start asking me what a blog is. One was actually a very educated man, a philosophe,r who had written several books. But then, I have seen of some of our friends older than we are, on Facebook!

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    1. My mother talks about the “kids” in her building (people only in their 70’s). I’m sure there will be technology I will avoid, even though I’ve made my living in this field for 40 years.

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  25. I think it’s pretty great that that woman was cautious having never seen you before. Nice to know there’s someone on the lookout. :)

    It’s also really nice that they can decorate their door spaces too. Some really did go “all out”. :)

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    1. Thanks Deborah. I was a taken back a little, as it’s a secure building and you have to know a person’s code, or call the person and have them “buzz you in”. I have been in the building before, but usually, we take my mom out. The woman was harmless, and the conversation was a bit of a hoot, when I thought about it.

      I do like the way they let the residents remain as independent as they can be. They are also there to help them, when they need help. All in all, it’s been a good place for mom to be.

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  27. This reminds me of my Mom’s senior living apartment building complex, Dan. They had a shelf and we’re encouraged to decorate and personalize their doors. I only took one photograph for my blog awhile back. . .
    My Mom tells people, “This is my daughter who writes and she blogs!” When she first moved to her past regular senior living apartment, she would sit by me in the Pub and look at a few of my posts and all of my blogging friends. She liked ones like yours, which has Maddie and the cats. <3
    I liked the idea of sharing several doors. The decorations are so cheerful!
    Happy belated 90th birthday to Dan's mother! 🎂 🎁
    I like the fireplace in the beautiful sitting room. My Mom's new place was set up for her not to use an elevator, so one floor with apartments in a circle around the gathering places. I am looking forward to seeing her again at Easter and wondering if her memory is still the same. Both brothers visit her often, and my sister in law, too. :)

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        1. We all have busy lives, Robin. Unfortunately, when I fall behind, I just delete the emails. I follow so many people that I can’t catch up. Sometimes, I can barely keep pace here. But, Thursday Doors are special, so I try my best to get to them.

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      1. My mom is just one year younger than your mom. She still lives on her own but she thinks about assisted living once in a while. If she could find a place like where your mom is, she would probably move.

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        1. I guess there are lots of terms to describe these places. Technically, this is “independent living” but the rents can be subsidized and there is a nurse on staff and a social worker. They can have visits from each, once a week. She can prepare her own meals in her apartment, or they have an optional meal plan in their cafeteria.

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  29. I liked the “you should visit more often” quote. Out of the blue comment, huh. The pictures are good and very rarely I get to see apartment pictures from inside the building.

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  32. This might be my favorite door post ever. It heartened me and helped me understand what I must look for if and when my time comes to move into assisted living: a door nook with room to decorate. Once an elementary teacher, always an elementary teacher and I have tons of seasonal stuff to delight others as they pass my door. And to think, my husband wants me to get rid of all that junk in the attic.

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    1. Thanks Janet. I think we need the ability to add our personal touches to our home. This place seems to understand that their residents consider their apartments to be “home” – it’s a good thing. I think my mother might still have a section of the chain-like things we made at Christmas with red and green construction paper and paste.

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  33. Lovely doors! I enjoy how each one makes it their own with pizazz and show their personality! Your mom sounds sweet. I guess I’ll be a good one and find Norman’s door page too. Where can I find it? Did I miss the link?

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    1. Found the link, right there in the middle of your lovely blog post! I think I was so enraptured by the doors and the thought of Thursday doors that I missed it! Maybe those other drivers were thinking of other things too! Just glad you are safe! Tell your Mom I went over to Norm’s! :)

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  34. Ohh, this edition is a bit special. First, all best wishes to your mom! Imagine what all she has encountered in her lifetime. Imagine us at her age if we’re lucky and what our descendants will be showing and telling us. Well, yours. Most of all I love the yellow of the lobby wall and the chianti colour of the hallway. And I’m glad too they are allowed to personalise their doors. Many happy returns!

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