Hashtag #nuffSaid

If we were having a beer, you’d have a technical question for me.

“So, Mr. Wizard, I have a question for you about your blog.”

“And that would be…?”

“Are you actually up and writing these things at 6:04 am?”

“No, not as a rule.”

“So, they’re scheduled in advance?”

“Yes, it’s a fairly common practice.”

“So, even though you sound all ‘in the moment’ you’re really sitting at a desk two days ago cranking out tomorrow’s observations?”

“Wow, I think you violated the Federation’s Temporal Prime Directive in that question, but yes, I do tend to write my blog posts in advance – if that’s what you meant.”

“Do you do this with other social media? I mean, are you tweeting some smart-ass remark about something while we sit here drinking?”

“I’m sorry to bring you two off your higher plane of existence, but you actually aren’t drinking, at least not yet.”

“Excellent point Cheryl. I’ll have a…”

“Yuengling. She doesn’t need to be a time-traveler to know that you’re ordering Yuengling. I however, enjoy being unpredictable…”

“So, Woodford Reserve for you?”

“Yes, Cheryl. I guess I’m not all that unpredictable.”

“I’ll get your drinks. You guys can go back to your own time.”

“Where were we?”

“You were asking me about scheduling social media posts. I don’t ever do that.”

“I want to ask why not, but I think you’re lying. I’ve seen tweets from you that are timestamped while we were at this very bar.”

“Yes, yes, you have. Tweets that I made while we are at this very bar.”

“No way. I would have noticed.”

“You never notice.”

“Notice what? What are you talking about?”

“SoundHound. You never notice that he uses SoundHound. Here’s your Bourbon .”

“I’m confused.”

“You are, but Cheryl’s right. The tweets you see that appear to be when were at the bar, are from when we were at – the – bar. If I hear a song that I like, I use SoundHound to identify it and then I tweet from the app.”

“No, I’d notice you typing.”

“gbs?”

“Wha…”

“GBS – it’s the keyboard shortcut for ‘Good bar song’ – I add that to SoundHound’s default tweet.”

“Our phones have keyboard shortcuts for meaningless asinine drivel?”

“OK, now you’re in violation of the Redundancy Prime Directive. And, no, our phones don’t have shortcuts, my phone does.”

“What makes your phone special?”

“I do – I’ve added a bunch of keyboard shortcuts for the stuff I say.”

“Because you’re not predictable enough in real life?”

“No. Because I make typos and I have to repeat some phrases a lot.”

“Like what?”

“Like my name. Like my email address. Like the URL of my blog. I added all of those when WordPress went off the rails and made me login to every blog I liked. I type ‘nf’ and my phone expands it to ‘No Facilities.’ If I type ‘nfc,’ it expands it to ‘http://noFacilities.com’ – It’s a pretty handy feature.”

“How long have you been doing this?”

“Since I wanted to tweet about Eat‘n Park – I never remember that there’s no space in Eat’n. Now I just type ‘enp’ and my phone does the rest.”

“I have to admit, That’s pretty cool. I don’t understand much about what my phone can do.”

“Well, it can’t place an order for food, or for another round at this place, but you can. Hint, hint.”

“Ha, we will have another round, Cheryl. Do you know about this feature?”

“I do. ‘lmj’ is my shortcut for ‘Love my job’ which I tweet after I get a sweet tip.”

“I’ve never seen you tweet that.”

“Wait, let me add ‘ns’ for hashtag-nuffSaid.”

“Ouch.”

“You stepped right into that one.”

“It happened so fast. I knew as soon as I heard the words coming out of my mouth.”

“Good thing for Cheryl, I’m paying today.”

“I think she guessed that. On another subject, did WordPress ever fix that login problem?”

“Yes and no.”

“Please, my head already hurts. Can you make this a simple, non-technical answer?”

“They had me delete the cookies and saved-data from their app on my phone.”

“You should have guessed that, that’s all you nerds ever tell people – reboot, reset, unplug, start over – it’s a good thing none of you went into medicine.”

“Ouch.”

“I couldn’t think of a comeback for Cheryl, but you? Like shootin’ fish in a barrel.”

“Thanks.”

“At the risk of a much longer explanation than I want to hear, why don’t you schedule social media stuff?”

“Cuz life goes off the rails like it did last weekend. I don’t want to be caught looking like the jackass du jour.”

“Good point, these days, it’s easy to be misunderstood.”

Click here to see the latest from Cheryl. The photos are from a recent walk with Maddie and a few of Maddie after we returned.

“It looks like the clouds are rolling in.”

“I can’t tell if it’s getting brighter or not.”

We walked from bright sunshine to near darkness.

The sun is working hard.

Very dark at the ball field. No, it’s not an eclipse, very heavy fog.

I hope they have better weather for the eclipse.

The ball games start in a little while. They might need the lights.

Midway through our walk and it’s getting darker.

“It’s no brighter up here.”

“The sun is burning through, I say we’ll be ready to start the game on time.”

I think it’s a zinnia bud.

After the fog cleared, things were busy drying off.

“These are my toys, but I’m too tired to play right now.”

“What’s that? Is that an intruder? It’s in the neighbor’s yard, but that’s still too close.”

“This is my blanket, but I got tangled.”

“Wake me when it’s time for dinner.”