In accordance with the GDPR (General Data Protection Regulation) the regulation which inspired me to get off my virtual butt and publish this statement, I will try to keep this plain and simple to understand.
You should understand that, due to regulations like GDPR and some stuff the folks in California are passing or already passed, I probably care more about your privacy than you do. You may not know, understand or even believe the number of fragments of your virtual DNA that you leave behind as you read posts like this. Let’s just say it wouldn’t require Lt. Columbo to piece it all together – Barney Fife could handle the task quite nicely.
If you read a post, it’s like you were caught on a surveillance camera. If you like a post, its like pushing the doorbell and not wiping your prints off. If you leave a comment, you might as well swab your cheek and leave the resilts in the mailbox. I know all about you.
Here’s the thing – I don’t care.
That’s not true. I do care, I appreciate each and every person who spends time reading this stuff. I value your ‘likes’ and I love your comments. Unless WordPress put them in my spam bucket, I always reply to your comments – well, unless we get into a serious discussion where one of us has to allow the other to have the last word. It’s OK, that can be you.
I don’t care, in the sense that I’m not collecting your name, email address, IP address, blog name, the country you live in, the place you work, the type of phone/laptop you’re using, the name of your Internet provider…oh, wait, I am collecting all of that.
I am, but I’m not planning to use it, or share it. Well, I share some of it, but only because I’m trying to protect myself and you from spammers, and I’m trying to figure out if more or fewer people are coming to this place day after day, month after month, year after – I’ve been writing this blog for over seven years!
So, I’m afraid that if you don’t want me collecting that stuff, you can’t come here. The first time you came here, I probably told you that. I told you again in May, when GDPR became law. I’ll tell you again if I have to. If you leave a comment, I’ll offer to tell you more about what happens with them. If you want me to forget about you, leave me a comment, or send me an email (see sidebar) and I’ll see what I can do. Really, I will.
I will forget about you.
However, if you want to have it look like you were never here, you may have to contact WordPress, Askimet, Google, YouTube (a flavor of Google), Flickr, whoever owns Flickr at the moment and everyone who owned Flickr in the past, Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, Apple, AT&T, Cox Cable and the Internet provider of every hotel I was staying in when I read one of your comments. Oh, don’t forget Southwest Airlines, Delta and Amtrak, just to be sure. You see, I can only take care of the stuff you left here. If you click on any links I add to my posts, you may have left a trail that I can’t erase.
If this is confusing, welcome to the club. If you’re wondering whether or not you need such statement on your blog, or whether you need to think about these things, tune in tomorrow when I invite an actual bona fide expert to tell you about the fairly new and very complicated law that may or may not affect you. Don’t worry, he’s a friend, I trust him and he’s fun to listen to.
In the meantime, enjoy a few pictures and, if that song is stuck in your head, check out the video. But, don’t say I didn’t warn you – the video is on YouTube and when you ring their doorbell, I can’t wipe off your print – sorry.