The Ice Man Returns – #1linerWeds

Humor, One Line Wed 80 comments

Long time readers here at No Facilities will remember my epic battles with my coworkers and the ice sheet in the freezer of our office refrigerator. At the first sign of weakness, I dispatched that fridge. A coworker took it home but vowed not to connect the ice-maker. I didn’t care, it was gone, and I was determined to be out of the ice clean-up business. Toward that goal, I purchased a new refrigerator that only delivers ice through the door. Mission accomplished.

Or so I thought.

Last week, we had a big meeting in the office. We served lunch, but we purchased way too much food. Or we purchased the right amount of food but invited too many diet-conscious people. In storing the leftovers, the side-by-side doors were open a long time. Long enough, apparently, for the crushed ice in the ice-maker’s delivery chute to melt and refreeze – perhaps several times. The next day, ice, cubed or crushed was not being dispensed.

The logic of the day appeared to be, “if we request enough ice, the ice-maker will eventually push through the clog.” Trust me, adding “material” to a clogged system in an attempt to clear the obstacle – NEVER WORKS!

By the time I was called, the situation was beyond control. Ice had spilled into the refrigerator compartment and, once the doors were opened, onto the floor. When those present explained the theory of adding ice behind an ice damn, I said:

“This is how the Great Lakes were formed!”

People probably didn’t notice that happening, either.

This post is part of Linda G. Hill’s fun weekly series One-Liner Wednesday. If you have a one-liner, I’d encourage you to join in on the fun. You can follow this link to participate and to see the one-liners from the other participants.

“Please, don’t use this option!”
39°f (3.9°c) is too warm. It’s supposed to be 37. This is why the ice melted. No ice is coming out because it’s clogged!
The ice had to go somewhere.
“See, adding ice to a clogged ice chute is not how you clear the clog. It’s how you build a much bigger clog.”
How handy – we have a mini ladle that fits inside the ice chute.
This was the initial result of cleaning the inside of the fridge.
“Well, it looks like we reached the bottom.”
I’m about 1/3 of the way in. I think that would be Lake Michigan or Huron.
Ultimately, I was able to clear the ice from the delivery chute.
“please don’t use crushed ice today” Thanks, Mom.
MiMi loves her blue blanket – she’s not thrilled about the light.
“The storm is scaring me. Can I squeeze in here?”
“OK, I feel better now. I think I’ll stretch out.”

80 comments

  3. Sorry you’re still dealing with ice messes at work, Dan. We have an inside-the-freezer ice maker at the new place. Ice that is rarely used and which has to be emptied out into the sink every so often to keep it from piling up. Pretty easy peasy. With your situation, I suppose it’s penance of sorts for being so confident you wouldn’t have to clean up ice again…or for eating too much food! ;-p

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    1. Thanks Mary – Maybe it’s penance. Maybe it’s the Universe telling me: “you’re not the boss of me.” The worst part is I don’t ever use ice! I will give one woman credit. She held the paddle in long enough to fill the fridge with ice, and she did her best to clean up the mess. The next three people who tried were oblivious to the mess they were making.

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  5. The HR person in me feels your pain, and the woman in me who hates to clean a refrigerator says someone better step up to do it because it’s not going to be me. :-) I’m the person who cleans up every little spot just so I don’t have to spend a couple of hours pulling it all out, sorting through, disassembling and cleaning any more often than I have to. :-) I wish you good luck in that someone who uses the frig a lot steps up to clean it out. And, I’m guessing you need a sign that says “This is a refrigerator, and in order to work it needs to be cold. Keep the door shut.” But, then you’ll need the other sign that explains how someone could be negatively affected by the cold temperatures dispensed by a refrigerator. Better yet, move up your retirement. :-)

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    1. Thanks Judy, I appreciate the support. I used to laugh at people who put signs on everything. Now, I want to put several signs on the fridge, a big one that says “CLEAN UP WHAT YOU SPILLED” on the microwave and I want to etch one side of the sink, saying: “Disposal on OTHER side!” Then I’d need a sign on the floor that says: “if your paper towel is here, PICK IT UP!”

      I think your last idea might be the only one that would work. 14 months and counting.

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    1. Thanks John. You would think that grown-ups wouldn’t need an escort, but… My wife thinks I should put a webcam in the kitchen and shame the people making the mess, using the last paper towel and spilling the ice. It is tempting.

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  7. And my husband wonders why I refused to get an icemaker with our new fridge–the more you have, the more can break. Oh, you mentioned microwaves at work. Yeah, don’t get me started either. How do some people live?!

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    1. There are days, I am almost afraid to put my lunch in the microwave. We have an icemaker, but it dumps into a bin and we don’t use much ice. I made a bigger mess with ice cube trays, so we’re OK for now. But I will never opt for one that delivers through the door. I’m sure Maddie would figure that out.

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        1. The breeder that we got our previous setter from said the their dogs had figured out the process and would go to the fridge for cold water. Their fridge had the option of adding a password to block pets, but at that point, it seems easier to just open the door.

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  9. “please don’t use crushed ice today” Thanks, Mom……This note is priceless. I’m still laughing. But I feel your pain. I remember the refrigerators that I had to defrost. They didn’t have ice makers, but some of the ice buildup in the freezer became chunks of slushy ice and the rest was water that poured down into the refrigerator. You had to physically empty the whole unit, put containers on bottom to catch most of the water, and have LOTS of towels handy.

    But that was routine maintenance. Your situation is irresponsible people. Not sure signs would help. If they even read them, they would ignore the instructions.

    So, 14 months and counting!! You got this Dan. 😜
    🔹 Ginger 🔹

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    1. Thanks Ginger – yeah, I can do this. I remember the units we had to defrost. Thankfully, we only had to do that at home. As bad as it was, at least it was my food, my milk/soda (I almost wrote water, but that’s back when we drank water from the sink). Somehow, that was easier to take.

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  11. I thought we’d seen the last of the ice maker/sheet stories after you purchased the new fridge for the office too.

    I have a very simple fridge with a bin. I like it. When it gets full the ice maker stops making ice, and like you we don’t have a problem opening the freezer pulling out the top tray and hand picking our ice cubes. It doesn’t crush which is fine.
    I’ll keep all my appliances Dumb for as long as possible!

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    1. I’m with you, Deborah. I have no desire to see a smart appliance in our kitchen. More things – more things that can break. I was going to ignore this, since I don’t use ice, but someone suggested calling a service company (which would also hit my budget). It wasn’t hard to fix, but it did require someone willing to do it – that seems to be in short supply.

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  12. I’ve never seen an ice-making fridge in a home or business in real life. I thought the ones on the display floor of the shop were just for decoration. You mean they’re not a myth?
    Or maybe here in Canada we just have enough ice outside … ;)

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  14. Dan, sorry, but your post today was a good laugh! The staff’s unbelievable problem solving, not your solution! I learned a lot about refrigerators over the past few months, a new motherboard, a new freezer fan & sensors. The high end refrigerators are full of problems. The next to go will be the compressor. At that point, it’s a new frig. Not paying for that high cost replacement! Love the pics of your fur baby family! Have a lovely Wednesday! 📚 Christine

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    1. Thanks Christine. The worst part of buying this fridge was when I told the salesman the old one was only 7 years old. He said – “that’s about average these days.” What happened to appliances that lasted 30+ years?

      I’m glad you had a good laugh – sometimes, that’s the only good thing that comes from these issues.

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      1. Right on ! My High End Frig was 7 years old! The technician works on all makes and says, buy Amanda side be side, easier to fix. The French 3 door models are problem ridden & expensive to repair. A new compressor will cost me over a thousand dollars. Yikes! Where’s my old, trusted Maytag? 🎶 Christine

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  16. The dreaded office refrigerator. It looks like you are the official refrigerator repairman for your office. LOL

    In one of my past jobs, we had a lunch thief who would steal lunches, take bites out of sandwiches, and replace hard boiled eggs with raw ones. The stealthy culprit was never caught.

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    1. I think I would install a webcam to catch that person. I’ve had someone throw my lunch out because it looked like something they had put in the fridge a week earlier.

      I am responsible for the budget, but I didn’t know this came with the assignment.

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  18. LOL! LOL! Yes, Dan, good one! :D
    I still have the non-working door issues from the almond side-by-side model that wowed the early 80’s. It’s still runnin, and I will keep it til it dies completely. (You know, cause planned obsolescence!)
    My in-laws willfully purchased a stainless steel side-by-side in 2006, and sometimes, when the ice comes out, a piece will fall to the bottom of the freezer instead of into the ice compartment and it makes a sorta cuh-clunk sound and then they say swear words for them, like Shoot! or Drats! and make scowly faces and then one of has to go open the freezer and remove the piece of ice that fell. And I wish all my problems were that big ;)

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      1. People are everything. Everything is people. I say this all the time. lol
        I didn’t mean you, I meant my in-laws :P Also, I am the QUEEN of petty complaints, so I would never judge you. Not that you care if I judge you. But still. Just sayin.

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  19. Not long before I retired, someone in my office got into a clean the frig frenzy and threw out my lunch. It was the first time I cussed out loud at work and in front of my supervisor, but she cusses for less so she was on my side. Glad I don’t have to deal with that anymore. Now I have the urge to look up the formation of the Great Lakes.

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  25. ah communal kitchens at work. It brings back fond daymares. I think there should be a sign at the entrance – Please leave your brains at your desk. Never mind you already did. Communal kitchens should be used as a training ground for FEMA and the EPA. Let’s stop there and head directly to Saturday and the bar. We can get the smart bartender from ‘Passengers’ and Cheryl can come around to the other side and drink with us. And we can tell lots of stories that could absolutely never happen in this universe. You know like the hibernation pod opening before we get to the destination planet…

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    1. I’m pretty sure my coworkers would ignore any sign that didn’t say “Free Beer”

      We should bring Cheryl out from behind the bar but you know how people are about going to work on their day off.

      You could train people in this kitchen for HazMat duty.

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