I Hope it’s Lima Beans

Image – Not an Actual Ad

This weekend saw an odd convergence of ideas in my area of space. First off, on Friday, I was talking to one of my favorite people about all things data, analytics and marketing. He gave me what I think will be my one-liner for Wednesday (unless something better comes along), and we laughed and marveled at the steps and missteps of industry around these subjects. I guess we marveled and laughed, but it was hard to tell.

On Saturday, our daughter sent me an article from the Wall Street Journal about how our most trusted apps, the ones we use for health and fitness, are sharing data about us with Facebook – even when they said they wouldn’t, or when they just didn’t bother to say they might. Facebook says, “we don’t even want this data.” Which is like me saying I don’t want a second beer on Saturday. Right, Facebook, we know, you could stop ingesting data about me at any time.

This, of course, leads me to a marketing rant, a subject(s) of which my drafts folder is chocka-block full.

With all the information Facebook, Google, Apple and AT&T have about me, why do they make such stupid choices in the ads they put in front of me?

Gut Doctor Wants Everyone to Throw Away this Vegetable!

The most frequent and popular food photo I share is one showing bacon and eggs. How often do they think I’m eating veggies? I might be to blame, because I’ve clicked on this ad a few times. They weren’t intentional clicks. The ad is big, and I have accidentally clicked on it while trying to scroll past it on my phone. I can tell you this much, it’s a video of sorts and he doesn’t reveal the vegetable early. Hence my lingering hope that it’s Lima Beans – I would throw them away in a heartbeat. Bonus points to anyone who has watched this and wants to share.

Casinos Hate it when You Use This Device!

I don’t get this at all. I don’t gamble. I have never been inside a casino, not even for a show or a meal or a conference. Never. The only device casinos would be angry with me for using would be math. I know, it’s not a device, but it’s close to being my superpower and it’s what keeps me out of casinos.

This Device has Revolutionized the Hearing Aid!

This is one where I get different flavors of the ad. I get the one captioned above, but often, I get one for: “Free sample of the best invisible hearing aid.” So, again, I have to wonder if anybody making these decisions is paying attention. I mean Facebook has more than enough pictures of me to realize that I’m not overly concerned with my appearance. And, although I did write about having a hearing problem a couple of years ago, I mentioned that it was a temporary problem. If you have all that data, you should be able to connect the dots.

Relevant but Stupid

About a month ago. I bought two Pitt (University of Pittsburgh) tee shirts. Fanatics was having a sale, and I bought one for myself and one for my brother. Same shirt – featuring the “Script Pitt” logo that was popular when we were younger. Not only nostalgic, but NOT featuring Pitt’s idiotic new tag line “Hail to Pitt!” which I wouldn’t wear if William Pitt had been reincarnated as Emperor.

Here’s what Fanatics knows about me from that transaction.

I scrolled through 11 pages of men’s tee shirts and that’s the only one I bought, despite many being offered at a lower price.

I had one shipped to my house and one shipped to Iowa.

I shipped them via the whenever-it-gets-here-is-fine-with-me cheap option.

So why on earth would Facebook, Google and WordPress start shoving an ad (featuring a Pitt shirt) from Fanatics in front of me for the next several weeks? Been there – Bought that – Done!

Not that I want to give these bozos information on how to market to me, but here are a few hints:

Show me Pitt gear when football season starts. I’m not going to buy any new shirts until then.

Show me ads for “The Best Hearing Protectors” ‘cuz after suffering sudden hearing loss from a power tool that someone was using, I wear hearing protectors more often than I used to (which was always).

Show me ads for bars with good food, nice bartenders and an atmosphere conducive to conversation – duh!

Unfortunately, I have many more examples in my folder. Fortunately (for you) I’m operating under an 800-word limit today.

In addition to the answer to the veggie question, bonus points are available for examples of the stupid ads you’ve seen. (799 – phew).


86 thoughts on “I Hope it’s Lima Beans

Add yours

  1. I get it, Maddie. We all have days when we just want to stick our noses between the cushions and hide from the world.

    I too am curious about what this mystery vegetable might be. One day I actually left the video running while I was preparing dinner. Curious minds NEEDED to know. Half an hour later, I killed the video while it was still rambling on. I started to believe this was a never-ending story.

    Liked by 2 people

      1. When we were kids, we called lima beans ‘tiddily winks’. Don’t know if you remember them but that’s exactly what lima beans tasted like in my opinion – small flat pieces of plastic 😝

        Like

  2. So they switched from the anti banana campaign? Mine always popped up the ‘lose all your belly fat by never eating this one food again. One day after many itritating months of not having my question answered I followed the trail of crumbs through the ether maze and ended up at a pseudo doctor site where there was a huge artical on weight loss with 50 examples of how to lose weight but nary a word on the miraculous ability to cut out one food and end the dilemma of ‘baggy shirt or no baggy shirt’. They did, however, want to sell a book. I suppose most internet junkies would be happy to be led into a plethora of information rather than have one stupid bit of information delivered that they were promised. Not me.
    And Amazon. Just because I purchased a hundred ultra cheap gift bags from China two days ago does not meanI need or want them every week. Or how about mens long johns? Cuz they wear out so fast….😳
    Me, it must be brussel sprouts. At least I could smash limas and mix them in with something else. 🙊

    Liked by 2 people

  3. I find the ads they show me are for something I’ve already bought. I get a table – for weeks I’m seeing more tables. How many do they think I can use?
    Love the animal pictures, but your breakfast made me hungry. It’s been a while since I’ve had one like that!!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks GP. Sorry about the breakfast image – I’m hungry, too. I always forget that I have to see that in the morning. Bonus points for the tables. They might be good at Allegro, but I’d take some cash, just in case.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I resist any temptation I might have to click on those unwanted, off-topic ads that show up when I get online. Your ads are similar to mine, although for some reason I consistently get ads for diamond engagement rings! I really don’t understand why, but then if I’m ignoring the ads I don’t have to.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Been feeling like Maddie but today I take my head out from under the cushions and begin to again push forward to find JOY. As for those ads …. ridiculous! I go to my FB homepage and I am hit with photography ads. Gee. Thank you, B&H! I actually googled my name once and I was shocked at the information they have on me. And this is from a person who is hardly online! Unreal!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Amy. Take a few bonus point with you. It’s funny, I don’t think I’ve had an ad from B&H, although I’ve spent a fair amount of money there. I stayed on the couch as long as Maddie wanted to be there – that’s the kind of guy I am ;-)

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Now I know I am not a robot and I am pretty sure you are not a robot (but when you go all
    technical . . .). So the question becomes who is collecting the data? Is it a plethora of high school dropouts who smoked waaay too much pot or it is a nascent Artificial Intelligence learning our ways? Mwahaha!!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I did click on that vegetable ad, cause I was curious. I eat a lot of vegetables…….but I got frustrated with the ad and clicked off. How much do they expect you to read before THE BIG REVEAL?! Geez, ain’t got time for that! Poor Maddie. Did she ever get comfortable?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Maddie did manage to get comfy, Lois. Upside down with her back feet pressing on my chest. We need a better system, or a bigger couch. I’ll give you bonus points for clicking off before the answer, because I just want the guy to go away. What ver happened to: “The answer is lima beans, but wait, there’s more…” ?

      Liked by 2 people

  8. I love Maddie’s curls! Also lima beans and Brussels sprouts. You just hafta cook ’em right. I buy stuff for my husband sometimes, so FB showed me a lot of handyman ads. Since I used to buy stuff for Mom and I post recipes, the adbots apparently also thought i was an incontinent handyman who liked to cook. But the funniest FB ad I ever saw was a local second-hand sale of an “electric chair.” It was a lounger you plugged in for massage and heat. I’m not doing FB now, so I miss all that joy.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. I knew you would toss in a vote in favor of limas. I like sprouts, at least when cooked one of a few different ways. I’ve never met a lima bean I wanted to eat. The closest is Succotash, but I pick out the corn.

      I’ll give you some bonus points, and I won’t take any away for plugging LB’s.And, I’ll give you an extra few points for representing an incontinent handyman who likes to cook – that must mess up the algorithms ;-)

      Liked by 2 people

  9. I’m not on FB, but I do Google from time to time, so I get those same annoying stupid ads. I’ve never ordered anything online. NEVER!! Guess “they” want me to.

    Sweet Maddie, you squish your pretty red head in a pillow any time you need to if that helps. Good hiding place!! And some days it’s darn near impossible to get comfortable on the couch, but your daddy makes it all better with a comforter. What a guy! 👍 And I love your curly “do”!

    Dan, that picture of your breakfast is killing me! My stomach is growling. Cheerios with blueberries and a banana (Oooooo, the dreaded killer banana!) is just not carrying me through the morning. Hell, I’m gonna just eat cookies. 🍪🍪🍪
    🐾Ginger 🐾

    PS: Wind here is unbelievable! Lights are already flickering. 😳

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Sorry about the breakfast image, Ginger. They have the same effect on me. I always forget that when I’m adding them to the gallery, at night, after I’ve eaten dinner. They look harmless then.

      Maddie has never laid in that position before. She’s almost always facing out form the end or the side. She had a very quiet day, and left me with a cramp in my left leg. The curls are cute, but she hates having her head wet. We bring her in, and while we’re trying to dry her feet, she keeps nudging the towel up with her nose – “dry my head first!”

      It’s windy here. I’ve been looking at the trees near the parking lot, wondering if I should move my car.

      Thanks for the comment, and one thing I’ve noticed, the Gut Dr never has anything bad to say about cookies. So go for it :)

      Like

  10. Hi Dan – Maddie definitely has the best idea … while your daughter is telling you things we all think are think are horrendous – I’m glad I just blog … I most definitely want to know what the veg is …most definitely! Cheers Hilary

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Hilary. I stayed with Maddie in a support (literally) position for a while. I guess she was just having a bad day. Maybe she felt the change in the weather. Until I hear otherwise, I’m going with Lima Beans.

      Liked by 1 person

  11. There is an incredibly huge difference between being very very good at collecting data and being very good at using data. Then again it is not us that have the data hoarding problem. Maybe we can get them to watch that hoarding show. If it (data) does not make you happy set it free.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I wish we had a privacy law that would allow us to force them to set our data free, John. I doubt we will ever get that far. At this point, we can’t even get them to obey the laws we have or honor the agreements they force us to sign.

      Liked by 1 person

  12. I hope the vegetable is kale, myself. Lima beans provide 188% of the RDA for molybdenum.

    I don’t get many weird ads: I use DuckDuckGo instead of Google, and have uBlock as my ad blocker. Google is almost as bad as Facebook at exploiting your information.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I could live with kale being the target, John, but I’d still ignore the limas. Google is every bit as bad as Facebook, and a lot less likely to go away. Even it Facebook stumbled and had to shut down, it would no sell the data before going.

      Like

  13. I like that winter swamp scene and Maddie showing us how to curl up.

    Is that doctor Steven Gundry? He has a lot of plants we aren’t supposed to eat including beans (unless they are pressure cooked). I’ve been on his diet for about a year. I now weight 160 pounds down from around 200 (maybe I should say 200+), but I’m on the diet for another reason: my wife is on it.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Bonus points to you, Frank. I don’t know if that’s the DR, but it’s as close as we’ve gotten to an answer. 200+ to 160 is a big drop. Maddie certainly knows the importance of being comfortable. That’s a valuable lesson. I’m glad you like the swamp photo. It’s the only palce I know that looks alive in the midst of winter.

      Like

  14. Dan – I remember a while
    Agal when you shared about ads popping up after you did some
    Searches and some purchase
    – and that throw of this vegetable ad has been everywhere – ((and side note – I do not think you should link their ads here – it gives them more exposure – and I think it is all about the click – maybe gives them a back door and more – )
    I also saw the article(s) your daughter was talking about and how company’s k is when certain woman are ovulating each month and other very personal physical data – hmmmm- and my question is why people don’t care more – to some it is no big deal

    L

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Yvette. By the way, I didn’t link to those ads for that exact reason, but I’ll give you bonus points for mentioning it for everyone – clearly a good idea. Yes, that’s the article. I was going to link to that, but WSJ won’t let you read it unless you sign-up and give them some of your personal information, which seems ironic, at best.

      Somebody makes money every time you click, that’s for sure. I can usually figure out why I’m targeted for an ad, but hearing aids? Vegetables? Outside of the “research” for this post, I’ve never looked into either subject.

      I don’t know why people don’t mind. I wonder if there’s a market for a health/fitness app that charges a small fee but doesn’t collect your data?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Oh and whew – I thought the ads were linked in the underlined titles – sorry about that and YOU get the bonus point for not linking it (and sorry if I assumed and spoke up but did not want to click and see)

        Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks John. Those are days we really wish dogs could talk. At least to answer “what’s wrong buddy?”

      I use Private Browsing a lot when searching for stuff for work. I’m not sure that that isn’t a different kind of scam – here’s the stuff he donesn’t want anyone to know about – but I try.

      Like

  15. Hihih, well done, math, for keeping you out of casinos. :D I haven’t been to a real one either. Somehow I prefer not to give my money away for nothing.

    As for vegetables, you’ve got some real confusion over there. Some excellent sorts have such a bad rep. I love kale, Brussels sprouts, cauliflower and broccoli with a passion. Who doesn’t like any of that – send it over. Ohh, and Swiss chard! <3

    About the things FB and Google try to sell to me: I have given up trying to figure it out. Sometimes I get a commercial for a product I only talk about on Skype. We've checked and tested. They know everything and we can't win.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. I bought a new pair of work boots early this month; now almost every website I visit that has ads shows me more work boots. It beats me, really, and I have asked myself the very question you asked in this post. Why am I seeing the same work boots over and over again? Same thing happens when I watch a YouTube video. It lives on my feed and every time I log in, it is one of the first ones recommended to me (although I already watched it!) This is one of the reasons I decided that AIs are still along, long way from taking over the world. It seems their programs are too linear to predict human behavior. With all the data they have on us, they still can’t figure us out.
    Any, I have enjoyed reading this post. I have realized that I enjoy your Monday posts the most. The ones that deal with some situations you have faced. I love them. Thanks, Dan.

    Like

    1. Thank you Peter! Mondays are days for the truly random things that get my attention. Sometimes I think they send us ads for stuff we bought in an attempt to report success to the vendor who might only get a summary report. They might see a “correlation” between ads and sales that really isn’t there.

      Liked by 1 person

  17. Oh I hate those throw out this one vegetable things. My pick would be kale but I doubt very much that’s the one. I’m betting potatoes. Or corn. Two things I can’t do without. I’m with Maddie today – it’s windy, cold and raining here as an atmospheric river arrives.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Jan. I’ll give you bonus point for supporting corn and potatoes. Not giving either one up. Curl up tight and tide out the storm. We have a high wind situation today, Maddie is a little tense.

      Like

  18. Thanks for including some calming photos of Maddie, squirrels, and nature…and now could I sell you some dog products? :-) At least that would make sense. I find it half irritating and half scary how when I even view a book on Amazon, an ad for it pops up on FB the next time I’m there. I find ads for all sorts of odd things, too, but I tend not to pay much attention, I guess, as I can’t think of any right now. I do remember and like the cycling jersey that has a picture of a sloth and says something like “We’ll get there sometime.” I’m also a bad ad viewer on TV, as I can rarely remember what company/product the ad was for, even if it was a really funny one. Oddly though, I can remember that Aaron Rodgers does ads for State Farm. :-) Hee, hee. The places I shop most, Costco, Aldi, thrift shops, and Half Price Books don’t seem to appear on FB and I’m just fine with that!!!

    janet

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Janet. I’ll pass on the pet products. It’s funny that you mention the Aaron Rodgers ads for State Farm. I actually un-mute those. The ones that really bug me are the ones for similar products that wouldn’t even work. Like supplies for tools I don’t own because I bought something like it for a tool I do own.

      Liked by 1 person

  19. It has GOT to be cooked beets! ;)
    Breakfast looks especially good while my dinner’s in the oven! Sketti squash tonight! Maybe I need some toast with it!
    Moo (who is 15) has long suffered from Pinterest suggestions on wedding gowns, engagement rings, cocktail recipes — especially sangria. The last recipe Moo needed was for a sorbet punch and since then, she has new Pinterest suggestions about BOXING gear. Punch is punch to them, I spose.
    I hate it when Sadie is pitiful. I always baby her and fuss over her and that’s all I can do.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’ll swap you your beets for my lima beans and a handful of bonus points. So, Moo is working up to be the boxing bride? Maddie got a weekend full of extra attention. We think it was the changing weather, she seems to know when a new front is rolling in. We’ve had very high winds today. It’s dying down now. Maybe she’ll be better tomorrow.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. We had crazy winds yesterday and today too. Took our chairs off the porch, some wires off the traffic signs, some folks’ power and siding. I sure hope Maddie will be relieved :)
        I like lima beans! Yay!

        Liked by 1 person

  20. Enjoyed your post, and your humor regardless of those annoying ads. Cute photo of your dog. Our cat, Spock, is black and white also. He hangs takes walks with the dogs and me! As for lima beans, you’d be in good company with one of our sons. He cannot stand them either. :)

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Discussing the ads that pop up all over the place could probably take on a life of its own. Wait until you hit 65, and the mail starts arriving not based upon interest but age. Then they annoy you on line and on paper. There is a company that sends me hearing aid info, and they have no option on line to opt out. So, I drove the mailing to the company and asked in person that they take me off their list. Nope – they’re still chucking mail at me. Love Maddie’s shots, and what a beautiful coat she has. :-)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Judy. We recently had a company say no when we asked to be removed. They won’t do it, because they also sell your name, and it’s worth more when they can prove it’s a valid address.

      I’m already getting the “now that you’re turning 65…” mail and email, and I think every Humana Commercial is aimed straight at my head. Ugh. Where’s a good beer commercial when you need one? Dilly Dilly

      Liked by 1 person

  22. LOL – I’m not a fan of those crazy Facebook algorithms either. For work, I also manage our company’s page from my personal account on Facebook. I get so many weird ads from the mixture of personal and work. I wonder what my ‘editors’ to the page think of all of the swimsuit ads? Yikes – your pet photos always warm my heart. Your pets are spoiled like mine. I can’t wait to read your #1liner tomorrow! Stay warm!

    Like

    1. Thanks! I manage our company FB page, one for an association I belong to, my blog’s page and my personal page. You used to be able to choose who you were representing each time you logged in. They seem to be “intelligently managing that now” – I shake my head when I get a notice that “No Facilities replied to a comment that you (Dan) are following.” Of course, this shows up right after I posted that comment.

      Liked by 1 person

  23. When I saw the title “I Hope it’s Lima Beans”, I wondered, should I read this? I told myself that I always enjoy Dan’s posts — but then I had to remind myself that it was about lima beans. It even hurts to type the name of that bean.

    Liked by 1 person

  24. Dan, you provide good humor while introducing the challenges we all face. I can identify with your post and unfortunately we’ll probably face more of it in the future. Yes, our information is out there and who knows how it is being used. :-)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s getting harder and harder to escape the reaches of technology, Jennie. I work in the field and I’m frustrated.

      Maddie’s goal lately has been – cuddle up next to someone who loves you , in a nice, soft, warm spot – that’s hard to beat.

      Liked by 1 person

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