Was it You or Mercury? – #SoCS

It’s Saturday, and in addition to Linda G. Hill’s Stream of Consciousness Saturday challenge, we have to deal with the fact that Cheryl is off today. If you’ve been to this bar before, you know what that means. As for the prompt:

“Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is ‘soul/sole.’ Use one, use both, use ’em any way you like. Enjoy!”

Linda doesn’t mention bonus points, but…


If we were having a beer, you would be looking for help or at least to be consoled with free bourbon.

“There you are. I was worried that you were going to be late.”

“I’m rarely late.”

“I know, but it’s been a tough week and I don’t need anything else going wrong.”

“Good afternoon, gentlemen. Are you guys still drinking the predictable and peculiar?”

“Skippy. Well, bless my soul…sigh.”

“Actually, for the umpteenth time, it’s Brad.”

“Hi Brad. Don’t mind him, he’s having a bad week. I would like a Corona, a frosted…uh, just in the bottle with a hunk of lime.”

“Cheryl is off today, but she washed the glasses last night.”

“OK then, I’ll have it in a frosted glass.”

“And you, sir.”

“I’ll have that peculiar mix, John Howell’s Bourbon, a glass of seltzer and a glass of ice on the side.”

“What kind of bourbon? I’m not familiar with John Howell’s.”

“Again, don’t mind him, Brad. John Howell introduced this bar to Willett Reserve.”

“John Howell, the author? He’s been here? In this bar?”

“As far as you know, yes. Now, can I have my bourbon?”

“Coming right up.”

“Why do you pick on him?”

“I don’t like him, Dan. If he gets our orders right, it will be a miracle.”

“OK, what’s eating you? You’ve been surly since I got here.”

“It’s this damn phone.”

“You’re always complaining about your phone. Why don’t you just get a new one?”

“This is a new one!”

“Oh, what’s wrong with it?”

“First, as soon as I turned it on, it needed an upgrade. Then I discovered that it doesn’t have the indicator lights I’m used to.”

“Here’s your beer, and here’s your Willett Reserve. I’ll bring the other glasses in a minute.”

“See, right so far.”

“The night, as it were, is still young.”

“And, it’s normal for a phone to need an upgrade after you buy it. It’s been on the shelf for, who knows how long.”

“It’s a new phone.”

“New to you.”

“No, it’s – a – new – phone. It only came out a week ago.”

“In that case, it’s planned obsolescence at work.”

“Here’s your seltzer, no flies, and here’s your ice.”

“Ha ha, you remember the fly? Maybe you aren’t so bad, Skip…sorry, Brad.”

“It’s OK, you can call me Skippy. It’s oddly endearing, like when my mother calls me Johnathan.”

“Jonathan?”

“Brad, is my middle name.”

“Skippy it is.”

“Awww, you guys made nice. See how things can change?”

“Things changing, that’s what I wanted to talk to you about.”

“Brad? Your phone? What?”

“No, I was wondering if you’re responsible for Facebook’s recent crash.”

“What did I do?”

“You wrote about them, twice in three days.”

“I assure you, they aren’t paying attention to me.”

“You never know. And what about the Legislature?”

“What did I do to them?”

“You wrote about the rest areas being closed from three-thirty pm until eight am and now they’re going to open them twenty-four-seven.”

“Hey, you didn’t add the ‘three-sixty-five’ to that expression.”

“Unlike you, I am in growth.”

“OK, now your bourbon is on me.”

“Huh, why?”

“Quoting Lwaxana Troi.”

“Who?”

“Lwaxana Troi, Diana Troi’s mother on Star Trek Next Generation.”

“Never watched it.”

“Buy your own bourbon.”

“Anyway, I was wondering if all these strange things are your fault or if it’s because Mercury is in retrograde.”

“I don’t pay attention to astrology.”

“But you memorize lines from Star Trek…”

“That’s different.”

“You guys want another round? Maybe some wings? You are the guys with the weird wing order, right?”

“It’s not weird, Skippy – at least my part isn’t – I like the traditional blue cheese dressing, Dan prefers Parmesan Peppercorn.”

“Whatever, do you want to order.”

“Wha…”

“…Brad, we’ll have another round and a large order of wings. And for the record, he hates it when people say ‘whatever’ “

“Whatever, I’ll get that right in.”

“You better pay, cause he’s not getting a tip from me.”

“Fine. I’ll pay. Given All you’ve been through, it’s only fitting.”

“You haven’t even heard all I’ve been through.”

“What else happened?”

“My microwave broke.”

“So, you had to buy a new one. What are they, eighty-nine dollars at Target?”

“I’ll have you know, I fixed it.”

“What? Wait a minute. You fixed something?”

“Yes.”

“You mean you took it to a shop.”

“No, I watched a YouTube, then pried the panel apart and cleaned the connection to the keypad.”

“Wow, I – am – im–pressed! I will be honored to pay.”

“Thanks. Now, can you help me figure out this stupid phone?”


Full disclosure, a little extra thought than Linda might like went into this episode, since the underlying events are well over a week old. Cheryl is off trying and drag spring out of bed, but you can find her handiwork over here. The gallery has a few signs of spring.

77 comments

  1. What a fun conversation, Dan. Did you really fix a microwave? Yikes!

    The prompt today would have been perfect for me, given that I drive a KIA Soul and have a personalized license plate that reads “BLESS MY.” :)

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks Mike. I didn’t fix the microwave, but I have a friend who wrote about doing that. I was impressed and I told him he might end up in a bar post.

      My wife drives a Soul. I thought about working that in, but the prompt took me in a different direction. Yours is a pretty cool license plate 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

    • We did agree. But I thought we could still use 24/7 by itself. I thanked him for not using “24/7/365” ad I knew that would get a gripe from you 😏

      Your gripes are always welcome.

      Like

  2. You have been awarded 250 bonus points for working Troi/Star Trek into the bar conversation about cell phones and Skippy’s real first name.

    That was entertaining, Dan. You can have fun without Cheryl once in a while, but really who wants to? I hope she’s back next week. In the meantime, give that nice young man a 20% tip and have a great Saturday.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks Mary. I appreciate the bonus points.

      We don’t go very long without Cheryl but when I need the bartender to be a bit of a jerk, I have to give her the day off. I’d hate to think about the comments if I did that to Cheryl 😳

      That episode of STNG includes one of my favorite lines by Data, “can you please continue the petty bickering…”

      I hope you have a great weekend!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Always fun to witness your antics at the bar! As for spring . . . Cheryl needs to throw a little cold water on spring and jump start it! Everything seems a little sad right now. Still too dark, too cold, too wet . . .

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks Pam. If anyone can wake up up spring, it’s Cheryl – she seems to be on a mission.

      We have bright sunshine today, but it’s cold enough to freeze the melting snow.

      I hope you have a good weekend.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. What on earth is that ‘thing’ you found under Mt Maddie?!!

    We had so much snow piled up in a few places this winter I thought of Maddie more than a few times. I think she would have loved it. Thankfully most of it has dwindled to a soggy mess now.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks Judy. If I had those skills, it would have been down, long ago. We had several nice warm days, followed by warm rain and thunderstorms yesterday. I think it’s safe to return. Maddie and I have already been for our Saturday walk – she wanted to get our early for some reason. The food was to demonstrate that I’m doing my best to skip meat on Fridays during Lent. I forgot to add that in the captions.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. I love the “Slow Turtle Crossing” sign. I’m guessing that’s a weird mushroom /fungus growth you found under Mt. Maddie. Ewwwwww! Looks prehistoric.

    Really like the river shot capturing the shadows. Looks like your colony of squirrels and chipmunks are enjoying the warmer temperatures. It won’t be long before they’ll have to outwit the bluejays for those peanuts!

    Gotta say, Mike Powell’s license plate is really clever!!

    Hope you and all your girls have a terrific weekend Dan. Hugs and belly rubs and brushings from Murphy to your four-legged girls! And a back rub for the Editor would be nice!
    🐾Ginger 🐾

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks from everyone, Ginger. Mike’s is a cool license plate, that made me smile.

      The snow is disappearing fast. The ground is finally soaking up the water. Maddie has taken me for my walk. MuMu has been brushed and the other critters will be knocking at the door pretty soon. We’ve seen robins, crackles and crows, along with a wide array of what I refer to as “birdie birds” all fighting for bird seed and peanuts. Chippy is back, and the bunny under my workshop survived the winter. I think it’s time for spring, or a beer, whichever comes first.

      Enjoy the weekend!

      Like

  6. A wide range of topics today, Dan. First of all, thank you for the mention. Second I noticed cole slaw served with your fish and chips. I hope Keith Channing reads your post since he thought cole slaw was a strange accompaniment. Third I’m glad to see Mt. Maddie turn into a molehill. I have to hope you guys will finally get a break. Are the dogwood beginning to bloom yet? That is a big sign (from memory). Finally, the story about fixing a microwave shows how useful YouTube can be. I have fixed some things using it. (Even replace a breaker to the dryer after going through a testing procedure directed by the YouTube guy.) Super post this week. Here are another 250 bonus points.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks John. Our dogwoods don’t normally bloom until May. You have a sharp eye for food. Scooter’s makes very good cole slaw, and it goes very well with the fish and chips. Mt. Maddie and the piles from snow-blowing the driveway are all the snow that remains. We had over an inch of warm rain yesterday.

      I realized when writing this that Skippy didn’t know you. It caused my head to spin a bit because of the whole SoCS thing.

      The story about the microwave is what got this whole thing started. A friend of mine (also an author) wrote about that on Facebook. I told him it’s the kind of thing that lands people at the bar on Saturday. He had already been complaining about the phone, so… YouTube is great for those kind of repairs. I think it’s one of the best uses of technology.

      Between you and Mary, I think I have enough bonus points for a couple Coronas later today. I hope you all have a great weekend.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Lwaxana Troi is an overlooked StarTrek character that makes me smile to think about her. Thanks for that reference. It does my soul good to remember her. Have a happy last winter weekend. Writing that sentence fills my soul with hope– of course, I am in growth!

    Liked by 1 person

    • I’m glad you liked this Ally. Majel Barrett brought a consistent voice to the series. I was glad to see them cast her as Lwaxana. I keep forgetting that this is the last weekend of winter – thanks for reminding me, and make it a good one.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Okay, I’m going to forgive you for putting in a name I can’t even pronounce-Lwaxa-what? Please tell me how it is pronounced, for I shall not be able to continue my day until you do! 🤔. I was not a Next Generation big fan so not certain who anyone other than Crusher (thanks Will Wheaton and Sheldon Cooper 🙊), Data, Picard and the handsome guy were.
    I cannot, however, forgive Skippy for his ‘Whatever’. Around us, using that phrase is akin to starting a fight, the worst kind of challenge. I empathize about the phone upgrades. And they leave you no choice, as eventually your apps won’t work unless you upgrade; but you have to be sure you have enough space in memory. Ugggghhhh. Just last night on IG a friend in another country posted a news report that WhatsApp had a breach by someone positing a color change and if you accept you were vulnerable to hacking. Im not sure if it affects software in this country or not, but at those times I forget my grudge against the big red fruit mogul and love Apple for its anti virus features.
    I hope Spring smiles on you this weekend, Dan. My Horoscope promises good days ahead….😉

    Like

    • “LA – woks – Ah – na” – is my best attempt. There are lots of reasons to find fault with Skippy. I hope you find spring, because, clearly, we need you back behind the bar next week.

      Since you’re not familiar, Lawaxana Troi is played by Majel Barrett, who played Nurse Chaple in the original series and has always been the voice of the Enterprise computer. She was married to Gene Roddenberry. If you need more information, ping Mary ;-)

      I am really getting tired of how hard we have to work to stay ahead of the bad guys on the Internet.

      I hope you find spring, drag her lazy butt out of bed and get her on her feet by mid-week.

      Like

  9. Ohhhhhhhh LOVE those night shots, Dan!! Good on you! And don’t you think you perhaps could be, now I’m just saying, you’re pushing it a bit by counting consoled and obsolescence as points for this #SoCS post? I suppose however, you gotta do what you gotta do to get those points. I applaud your imagination! Great gallery!! Thank you! 🤗

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I am a fan of STNG and so abashed not to remember the context of Lwaxana Troi’s quote. I do appreciate the turtle crossing sign and that it appears Scooter’s Diner uses biodegradable and recyclable dinnerware.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I figured you would like the turtle crossing, JoAnna, and you’re right about Scooter’s. The episode is “Haven” when Diana is about to be married to the guy that ultimately goes onto the Tarellian ship. The scene is at the dinner the night before the wedding. Thanks!

      Like

  11. Jonathan Brad, eh? Skippy is so much better. Oh, that sign–is it: SLOW. Turtle crossing or Slow turtle, crossing. I’d have horns honking behind me ’cause I’d be stopped and trying to figure out exactly what they were saying…..whatever. :)

    Liked by 1 person

  12. You can console me here about the meanness of a huge picture of fish and chips… I miss potatoes so much and it kills me knees — arthritis… so it is pure mean to show me that gorgeous plate of heavenly stuff and I haven’t eaten breakfast.
    Be nice to Skippy. He is trying. So many his age just go off crying if you say “BOO” to them.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. I like your clever use of
    The prompt (three times – right?)
    And I read a few comments so I know
    Your friend fixed his microwave –
    Which I do think is amazing (even though we are using ours less
    And less and might do a remodel that leaves it out –
    And glad you did not force the Kia Soul into it – cos the post had just what it needed.
    ;)

    Liked by 1 person

  14. It makes me crazy when otherwise intelligent, reasonable friends start to write about Mercury being in retrograde in their Facebook posts. I know that I’m probably too skeptical in general but really? What the heck does that mean (rhetorical question… I really don’t want to know). It looks like spring is starting to pop out all over where you live!

    Liked by 1 person

    • I tend to look for clear, logical reasons for things that happen. Sometimes, it’s hard to connect the dots. I’m biting my digital tongue as I refrain from answering your rhetorical question, but it doesn’t help explain the we discussed today. We’re starting to see the very early signs of spring, but it’s too early to expect much. I noticed a little bit of green on the Lilac buds but it’s too early for them to bloom. We will still have many hard freezes.

      Like

  15. I believe you may recall we fixed our microwave by getting rid of it? At least it didn’t die in a fire. Still, I’m impressed when people fix things.
    I’m glad things went well for Skippy Jonathan Brad, or whatever ;) I like the photo of the trees and puddles in the snow :)

    Liked by 1 person

    • And you might recall how my mother set her microwave on fire…twice. That might explain why my wife doesn’t want one. I’m not sure we know how things will work out for Skippy. I’m reasonably sure he will take over for Cheryl again at some point. Those trees are in part of a cool little park. It has walking trails, but it floods a lot.

      Liked by 1 person

  16. There’s a You Tube video to fix anything , I think . Sometimes I have to search through a few of them to find a useful one. Microwave I haven’t had a problem with yet , though . Washer : yes. Dishwasher: yes . Computer:yes .Water heater : yes. Hey , what about world peace ? I should look for a video .

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks Deborah. Cheryl never gets more than one weekend off. I don’t want her becoming a free agent. The critters are bringing our world to life. They might be rushing the season a bit, but they are making their presence known.

      Liked by 1 person

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