Déjà vu – #1LinerWeds

If this looks familiar, it’s because it was accidentally posted yesterday. Either I didn’t know the date, or WordPress was messing with me.

Whenever I travel, I try to eat at the bar. I don’t know why, but some restaurants don’t let you eat at the bar, or they offer a limited bar menu. I think that’s dumb. Why waste a table on one guy who doesn’t want to sit there?

Eating at the bar has pluses and minuses associated with it. On the plus side, is the possibility of conversation, either with the bartender or the guy on the next stool. I’ve met some good friends that way. Another plus is service. Bartenders are on top of things in a way waiters and waitresses never will be. A good bartender has timing that makes NASA jealous. The only minus I can think of is when the person on that next stool is a jackass.

Back in early February, I was on my way to Ft. Myers, FL. Since it was Superbowl weekend, Delta was routing people around Atlanta, so my flight went through Detroit. That’s OK, I like the Detroit airport. I had the choice of two connecting flights into Ft. Myers, one with a 35-minute layover and one with a two-and-a-half-hour layover. I like flying stress-free, so I took the longer layover. My flight into Detroit was early, so I ended up on the ground for 3 hours. It was lunchtime and I opted for P.F.Chang’s. Full menu at the bar, Kirin Ichiban available and outlets for charging my phone. Perfect.

About five minutes later, the jackass arrived.

Within seconds, he was muttering about the slow service. He made it clear to the bartender exactly how little time he had. She assured him he had plenty of time to eat. He ordered. He sat there, restless, while he downed two whiskey sours. That made me think of my mother, that was her drink. Perhaps that wasn’t a good comparison for him, as she was difficult for a restaurant to please. He continued to ask the bartender if his food was ready. She continued to assure him it would be ready when she promised. I few minutes passed, and the bartender returned. She asked me how I was doing – I said “fine” She asked him, he said, “I’m still waiting on my food.” I had ordered well before him. My food came. We had ordered similar items. He asked, “could that be my order?”

…no, no it couldn’t. I was here first. I ordered first. This is mine. Have another whiskey sour, mom.

A few minutes later, he barked “if it’s not going to be ready, just cash me out.” The bartender tried to assure him that his order was almost ready. He snapped at the bartender:

“I have a plane to catch.”

She replied:

“This is an airport. Everybody has a plane to catch.”

His food arrived, as the bartender said it would, in plenty of time.


This post is part of Linda G. Hill’s fun weekly series One-Liner Wednesday. If you have a one-liner, I’d encourage you to join in on the fun. You can follow this link to participate and to see the one-liners from the other participants.

82 comments

    • Thanks Mike. I can’t tell you how many bulbs we planted (years ago) but this one little croci keeps pushing up. It’s my favorite sign of spring, next to the local soft-serve stand opening.

      Liked by 2 people

  1. It’s so good to see the ‘end of the ice’ photo, Dan. And that Kirin and spicy chicken look amazing. I’m with you on the misery of having someone slap your zen right in the face. Every time I come across people like that I winder why I feel like such a jerk for legitimately complaining about something. Enjoy the thaw!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks Cheryl. I should get a tee shirt that says “Don’t be Mean to the Bartender” – I was just glad he and I weren’t going the same place. The beer and the food were both good. It was a good place to hang out for a while.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Ha! I’m guessing that guy ate his food in five minutes and left. Or did he have another whiskey sour because he really wasn’t in that much of a hurry?

    Our moms would have made excellent dining partners. My mom would have given explicit directions to the waitress on how her food should be cooked and your mom would have been asking “Where’s our food?” every five minutes. Both with their adult refreshment. Good times. Fond memories…

    Liked by 1 person

    • The guy gobbled and split for the gate, but another whiskey sour was involved. If not for the drink choice, I might not have paid that much attention to him. Fond memories (and a few scary ones).

      Happy Spring!

      Like

  3. My other half loves to eat at the bar. I don’t mind it once in a while but if it’s it a really nice restaurant I’d rather have something prettier to look at than rows of liquor bottles. Heck, I can do that at home.
    Love your black squirrel!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Glad you survived the jerk and lived to tell the tale. :-) And, many thanks for cheering spring on so it comes quickly and stays for a while. Beautiful crocus, and if you find out where bulbs go, well except to the lunch buffet for your squirrel friends, be sure to let me know. I’m always looking for those bulbs I planted last fall. :-)

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks Judy. Years ago, we cut the driveway back from the house, to stop the heat from warming the house. We dug down and filled a slot with pretty good soil. As we were filling it we planted a ton of bulbs. The one crocus is all that we see on a regular basis. Maybe the rest are/were squirrel food – that was before we were feeding them :)

      I just hope spring is planning to stay.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. You do meet some real winners, Dan. I saw this post yesterday morning but when I came back to read it last night–it was gone. So glad for the explanation. Some people are just so darn important……I love that bartender’s comeback. Imagine the story he told the person on the plane sitting next to him. Oh, my……

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I like to sit at the bar too. Hubby and I have had many great conversations with bartenders over the years by sitting at the bar. Oh, that poor bartender, dealing with the jerk you encountered.

    Liked by 1 person

    • It has to be hard enough to work at a bar in an airport. She didn’t deserve to have to serve this guy. I (almost) always enjoy sitting at the bar. Sometimes, my wife and I will do that, if it’s a place where she knows the staff (our regular joint).

      Liked by 1 person

  7. I had to check my calendar yesterday when I read your post. I thought I had lost an entire day!!

    ” This is an airport. Everybody has a plane to catch.” Perfect comeback.

    You sure meet some jerks in your travels, but at least you get good lessons on how not to treat people.

    That ‘starving’ squirrel has one fat bushy tail. Love those shots of the dwindling ice. And that one lone crocus is a beauty. I saw my first Robin on Monday. Yaayyyyy. Later today Spring will officially be here…..hot damn!!

    Happy Spring Hump Day Dan.
    🐾Ginger 🐾

    Liked by 1 person

    • I am sorry about rushing the calendar, Ginger. I travel a lot, so I think the percentage of jerks is low, but air travel brings out the worst in people. I choose long layovers, I check my bag, I arrive early, all to take the stress out of flying. I also kinda enjoy being in an airport, so it’s hard to ruffle my feathers.

      We have a few squirrels who wintered well. We’re trying to remind them that they can gather food now that the snow is gone, but there isn’t much.

      I almost had a picture of a robin, but Maddie barked and scared it. Happy spring!

      Like

  8. Lovely spring-is-coming shots, Dan. I have hopes that it will be arriving here a bit more forcefully soon. I saw some bit of green grass poking out from under the dead leaves at the park the other day. :-) Our daffodils have poked out of the ground and stand a good chance now (I hope) of not freezing before they grow enough to flower.

    There are jerks everywhere, aren’t there? At the pastry shop, someone complained that they weren’t greeted or told goodbye. We do a very good job of that, but if the shop if full and we’re helping other people, that doesn’t always happen. I think that if that’s the worst thing you have to complain about, you shouldn’t. :-)

    Reading the routes often taken to get from one city to another by flying often amuses me, as they are so circuitous!

    Happy Wednesday!

    janet

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks Janet. “I wasn’t greeted…” maybe he should shop at Walmart. You’re right about “if that’s the worst thing…” Some people seem determined to suffer through life. I did think it was odd going through Detroit to get to Florida, but with the Super Bowl being in Atlanta, I guess it made sense.

      Liked by 1 person

  9. I call them asshats. I believe they have a mission to make everyone around them miserable. Really throws their game when they get a calm reaction.

    My mother also loved whiskey sours, but she was also a dream customer. Maybe because she had also been a server and a bartender.

    Have a good day.

    Liked by 2 people

    • That’s s good word for them.

      Working in retail or food service gives you a different perspective, that’s for sure. My mother wasn’t mean, but she would ask for things the way she would make them (which wasn’t good). She left a lot of waitstaff shaking their heads.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. There are always people who believe the center of the Earth runs through where they are at the moment. What would be great is to give them a Micky Finn and be done with them. Heaven is a 22oz bottle of Kirin. Thanks for sharing. When I was a big traveler I hated to walk into a restaurant and have the host ask, “just one for dinner?” I wanted to say, “I’m with 50 of my imaginary friends, but I’ll be the only one eating.”

    Liked by 3 people

  11. Ah what is better when trying to catch a plane a net or a snare ? And what does one use for bait ? Is it like calf roping ? Do you have to flip it on its back and lasso the landing gear ? Darn this is starting to sound better than all reality shows currently on the tube. Getting back to the downside of eating in bars there should be a sign posted ‘oscillating sphincters prohibited. get your drink and go sit in the corner quietly’. Like those pics of the ice and leaves and the crocus. though I will not miss the ice when it is time for it to be gone.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Always take the shorter layover :). Ah what do I know. I am travelling again for business for the first time in almost four years. All I can say is I am not looking forward to it. I wish we had “beam me over” Star Trek devices in lieu of planes. I’d even settle for a bus ride … just wake me up when I get there. Lol.

    Nice gallery. Looks like spring has sprung.

    Liked by 1 person

    • You and I can’t fly together. I avoid short layovers and anything else that adds stress to travel. I fly stress-free (as best I can). I see people running from gate to gate, and I see people arriving late and not being able to find a place to put their bag. I walk through the airport, I eat, I buy a magazine and I check my bag so I don’t really care much about the overhead bin, The most I ever stick up there is the backpack with my laptop. I’m hoping spring is here for the long haul.

      Liked by 2 people

      • I’m habitually early but I hate to wait. Go figure. That’s a good tip about checking your bag. The overhead bins are a nightmare. I think it’ll all come back to me. At least I’m hoping.

        Liked by 1 person

  13. I laughed out loud with your snide comment “Have another whiskey sour, mom”. I can so see myself saying that to my panicking mom. And the bartender tenders comment “Its an airport, everyone is waiting on a plane”, priceless. You pictures are wonderfully warm as always, even with melting ice. have a great week.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks Anita. My mom was a joy to dine out with. Usually, family members kept her from hurting the relationship with the waitstaff. My snide comment was kept to myself, but I loved the bartender’s remark. The guy was just awful. I’m sure she realized that her tip was going to be minimal, there was no pleasing him.

      Like

      • You really have to work at being a butt! It is so much easier to be nice and relaxed. Yes I knew you didn’t say the comment out loud but it so reminded me of something I could have said to my mom back in the day. Or better yet what my brother and I would say to each other in memory of her.

        Liked by 1 person

  14. Hi Dan – always the risk of some nonsense joining you at the bar … spoils things. Funny route you took … I know it’s the big game – but seems to be miles round … though obviously for the airlines the sensible route – and as you say … it’s a comfortable journey for you. Lovely to see the crocus and they are so reliable aren’t they … cheers for now – Hilary

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks Hilary. It did seem like the round-about way to get to Florida, but I got there. I used to work for a shipping company. This (routing) is what we used to do with cargo. I guess we’ve become cargo.

      That crocus greets us every year. Her friends have died off or been eaten by chipmunks, but she’s still hanging in there.

      Like

  15. Haha, I love her come back about it being an airport:) Am surprised he didn’t try to convince you that the service was slow:) Love that crocus – and oh wow, there is one image where the snow is gone!

    Liked by 1 person

    • The snow is almost gone (I hope for good). Fortunately, the guy was sitting too far away to have a comfortable conversation. I like to wait until I hear how people talk to the bartender before deciding to start a conversation. This guy went straight to “nope, not talking to him.”

      Like

  16. LOVE THAT BARTENDER! That remark was Cheryl-worthy. “Have another whiskey sour, Mom.”–BEAUTIFUL! Two one-liners for the price of one. ~grin~ Great photos, too; the combination of dead leaves on ice and crocus says “Spring” as nothing else could.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. That man was an egotistical idiot. He must have thought he was the only one ordering food until he saw your plate. Then, to try to alleviate his stupid mistake, he made more of a fuss.

    I like eating at the bar too. There usually plenty of conversation.

    Like

  18. Hah! I wonder how many times a day wait staff has to say that at an airport? I bet a lot. I think we all have things we have to say every day, depending on the job.
    I liked your connection between the drink and your mom. My whiskey sour drinker friend is also quite fussy. He’s very detailed. You may be on to something.
    Leaves in ice. Always a hit with me :)

    Liked by 1 person

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