Talk Like a Gangster – #SoCS

Welcome to the bar at No Facilities. We’re gathered for some adult refreshment and a roust with Linda G. Hill’s Stream of Consciousness Saturday challenge.

“Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is ‘open book, point, write.’ Pick up the closest book to you when you sit down to write your post. Close your eyes, open the book, and place your finger on the page. Whatever word or phrase your finger lands on, write about it. Enjoy!”

The problem is, I’m still reading “Mickey Cohen – A Novel” by Bradley Lewis. Let’s just say, Mickey has a language all his own.


If we were having a beer, our conversation would be interrupted.

“Yikes, somebody bring me a broom!”

“Cheryl, what on earth is the matter. Did you break a glass?”

“No, David. There’s spider in the doorway to the keg room.”

“Do you have a paper cup? I can trap it and take it outside.”

“Thanks Dan, but this guy would need the extra-large. He needs to meet his maker…now!”

“Maybe he’s a she?”

“That’s worse. That’s all I need is a bunch of babies busting loose in there.”

“Cheryl, I took care of the spider.”

“Aw, thanks Donny. Now, what about you two, you want something to drink?”

“I’ll have the eight-leg IPA.”

“Very funny, Dan. I’ll get you a Corona.”

“Sorry, I was jus kiddin.”

“Is that anything like ‘kidding’ Dan?”

“Yes, David. I’m still reading Brad Lewis’s new novel about Mickey Cohen. Mickey didn’t talk so good.”

“Sounds like a bunch of mashugana.”

“Ha ha – you’d fit right in.”

“Here’s your beer, Dan. David, you didn’t order, but I brought you a glass of bourbon.”

“Aw, you remembered the cherries – thanks!”

“You’re welcome. I’ll be back with the ice and seltzer.”

“So, you’re telling me you trap spiders and release them in the wild, Dan?”

“I’m not sure the Forsythia qualifies as ‘the wild’ David, but yes.”

“You never squish them?”

“Sometimes, when I have to.”

“Like when?”

“When I find one in the shower.”

“What’s different about the shower?”

“I’m naked.”

“So is the spider.”

“That’s true, I suppose, but the spider seems more comfortable with being naked than I am.”

“That’s a good thing, Dan, cause this ain’t that kind of bar. You boys want any food?”

“Not today. Cheryl. I’m still full from breakfast.”

“Oh no. don’t tell me you had breakfast with John?”

“I did. David.”

“At Allegro?”

“Yes.”

“And, in your typical pattern, you didn’t bother to invite me.”

“We met at Allegro at seven-am.”

“Yikes, I’d rather deal with the spider.”

“You’re not a morning person, are you David.”

“No, unlike you, I prefer to sleep until a civilized hour.”

“Is that eight? Nine?”

“I’m usually up before nine.”

“Up before nine? I had already eaten and was outside working on my garage by nine.”

“What time did you get up?”

“Five-fifteen.”

“No one should be up at five-fifteen. Is the sun even up?”

“Just about. Sunrise this morning was at five-sixteen.”

“You could have given yourself an extra minute.”

“You boys still nursing round number one?”

“I’m almost ready for another Corona.”

“What about you, David. John Howell’s gonna have to raise the price of his books if you keep sipping that bourbon.”

“Gonna? Have you been reading Dan’s book, too?”

“It’s a bar, David. Not English class. And, it’s really Willet Reserve.”

“I know. I’m sorry, Cheryl. I’ve been reading resumes all week.”

“Paper, email or text messages?”

“You joke, but…”

“You’d be happy to know that by the end of the book; Mickey was speaking a bit better?”

“Was the love of a woman involved?”

“Something like that, no spoilers.”

“Fair enough. How’s the garage coming.”

“Slow, but sure. I’m working on the deck outside of my workshop.”

“Is that part sided yet?”

“No. Once the deck is built, I have to raise the door, move it out about an inch and then it will be ready for siding.”

“Why didn’t you finish it last year?”

“The ground froze.”

“So?”

“I had to dig several forty-two-inch-deep holes for concrete piers and four-by-four posts.”

“Cheryl, I’ll have that bourbon now. I’m starting to ache, listening to all this work.”


I’ve dropped a bunch of names today, so I’ll make this easy:

Brad’s author page.

Cheryl’s latest post.

John Howell’s latest post.

David’s (namesake of my buddy) latest railroad post.

And, don’t forget to head on down to the Crossroads and see what’s going on in Parliament, Mississippi.

In addition to being part of Linda’s challenge, this post was inspired by Kate Powell, who gave us the spider.

73 thoughts on “Talk Like a Gangster – #SoCS

Add yours

  1. Dogwood is beautiful, breakfast looks delicious, I hope Maddie is still doing well, but I really like the DIY. I’m thinking when you retire, you need a DIY blog so you can get into detail and those of us whose pulse quickens at those three letters could get a real fix from an expert. :-)

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thanks Judy. When I had my cabinet shop, I offered “DIY Support.” I would either make parts of a project or help with a task that required special tools. It wasn’t very lucrative, but it was rewarding.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I was unfortunately awake about 5:30 this morning (and most mornings.) Sigh. I keep waking up at that time, so I really need to go to bed earlier than I do. After seeing your post, I feel like I need to eat some breakfast. I also need to get some plants out of pots and in the ground while it’s still relatively cool, so I’d best get up and at it. I hope Maddie is feeling better and that you have a great weekend.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Janet. We’re taking it day-by-day with Maddie. She seems a lot better but not back to normal routine. She still has The Editor up at 3:30 to visit the yard. I hope you have a nice weekend

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Great storyline and photos. After seeing the breakfast display at Allegro, I’m hungry and thinking bacon! :D BTW, Honeysuckle is one of my favorite plants. Have a great day, Dan.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Gwen. That breakfast was yesterday. Today, it’s Special-K 🙁

      Every fall, we chop that honeysuckle back to the fence. Every spring, it takes over again. It is pretty and it smells so sweet.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. My English teacher in junior high school would have us go to the big globe by her desk, eyes closed, spin it, and when it stopped spinning place a finger on it. Whatever country we landed on we had to research and write about.

    That Korean Dogwood just keeps getting more beautiful. Your DIY garage project is coming along nicely. Great weather this weekend to work outside.

    Hope Maddie and MiMi are completely over their belly boo-boos. At least Maddie can enjoy watching you work from her cot this weekend! She’ll make sure Sammy doesn’t knock over your Corona! Lol.
    🐾Ginger 🐾

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Ginger. I will be back out at the construction site in a little while. Maddie has been for a walk, helped me eat my English muffin and might be ready for a nap. She’s still dragging The Editor out in the wee hours of the morning (for mostly non-productive visits to the yard). We are hoping that this stuff doesn’t return once the meds wear off.

      GP Cox has me going to the globe and doing research these days. All these islands in the Pacific are making me shake my head and ask “where the heck is that?”

      I hope you have a great weekend!

      Like

  5. Great photos, Dan. Also thanks for the kind pingback. I spotted the Willet long neck. Your project looks terrific. That deep piling would take a jackhammer here. Of course, our frost line doesn’t exist. I hope Maddie gets to 100% soon. Always a worry. Have a great weekend.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Thanks for the shout out for the “Brother Love” serial, Dan — and for another fun Saturday at the bar.
    All those power tools…I know you must be enjoying that project. Although it sounds like a huge amount of work. I’m glad the furry kids are feeling better.
    Hugs!

    Liked by 1 person

      1. With any sort of building, you’re creating — and you eventually get to see a finished product. The physical effort of a day is (unless we hurt ourselves) easier to let go of than the mental stress of “office” jobs. But the effort can be huge! :)

        Liked by 1 person

  7. This one cracked me up… Changed your writing voice a bit, got that. I was not able to leave comments under the images but dogwood and rose of sharon are both near and dear to my heart! I stole the dogwoods for reference — love to see the rose of sharon when she blooms. Thanks for mentioning me and the deck will be great!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I could send some rain your way–but that would mess up your project. Which is looking pretty darn, good I might add. Two weeks ago we had a heat dome. This week we have been pounded with rain for 4 days straight, with no signs of letting up. I love the photo of Maddie…..wherever she is in there! Have a great weekend, Dan.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. More garage work? Somehow, like David, I thought you were done with that business. Oh well, I suppose it keeps you out of trouble and the Editor’s hair. Right? :-p

    Hope you’re having a super Saturday, Dan.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Mary. This was as far as I got last year. It was a good place to stop, even though my workshop was full of raw material all winter. I’m making short work of that now.

      I hope you’re having a great weekend.

      Liked by 1 person

  10. I like these prompts too, Dan. Mone will be a bit late. Thanks for the shout out. Thank Donny the spider went away. Those who have chosen to join me in the tub have met with burials at sea. 🤣🤫 Good luck with the new project.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. I trap spiders and take them outside, too. Also moths, beetles, and unknown insects – but not roaches. I think I owe my anti-roach bias to my mother. But spiders especially need to be rescued and escorted outside because they catch mosquitoes. And then there’s Charlotte’s Web…. I have a cup and stiff junk mail in the kitchen specifically to catch bugs. Being in the shower does present a dilemma though. Thank you for your efforts to help save the spiders. :)

    Liked by 1 person

  12. This deck is kind of making my head hurt … “Once the deck is built, I have to raise the door, move it out about an inch”. Whaaat?! One doesn’t just move a door about an inch! Am I missing something?

    Happy carpentry work. When you’re done, I have a number of projects for you 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ha ha – I’m sorry to make your head hurt. I can explain. First, the door is a barn door so moving it is a matter of moving the track (up/down/in/out).

      The deck structure is as low to the ground as it can be and still tie into the structure of the shop. So, the door has to go up to accommodate deck boards.

      Right now, the door slides over the wall (with about 1/8” clearance). It has to be moved out (with new trim) do that the door can pass over the siding.

      Like

  13. You covered a lot of ground with this post. I can’t believe you are installing these beams without a tower crane. Then again you would probably need a tower crane to lift the permit for a tower crane… dems the rules.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Your shower commentary is spot on. I can be all Preserve The Nature! every single day, but drop a spider in my shower and suddenly one less arachnid on the planet isn’t such a concern…

    Liked by 1 person

  15. You’re doing a swell job on the deck! I sure wish I was getting a new back porch.
    I discovered the people at my office do not put out any spiders, they must kill them all. Apparently, half of them have had medical treatment for spider bites. I suppose I’ve been fortunate. I’ll kill them when they’re in my house and they’re big enough to LOOK at me, but I generally throw them outside. At work we’re having the bug people spray because of one large spider in the basement.
    Breakfast looked fantastic!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks! How big is the guy in the basement? That sounds like the beginning of a bad movie. I’m still the guy in the office that folks come to to complain about bugs. Usually, it’s small biting fly things that are attached to plants people bring in. Not only do I have to get rid of the bugs, I have to tell people to get rid of their plants. The joys of office admin.

      The “deck” is supposed to be a functional extension of my workshop. Stay tuned.

      Like

  16. Another home improvement project! It looks like this one will be complete well before winter.

    Your Dogwood is GORGEOUS!! I wonder how’d they fair here? Will need to look up zone info on that and one other plant.

    Breakfast looked so good! I’m hungry it’s nearly dinner time. I should have waited to open your post. 😊

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Deborah. Actually, this is the last step in the project that didn’t get finished before winter. It’s more complicated than I wanted to deal with, and it would have required leaving the cars outside well into December.

      Sorry about the breakfast photo. The Editor commented on that as well.Maybe I should put those behind a link (click here to see breakfast). I don’t even like looking at it on Saturday morning, when I’m having Special-K

      The Korean Dogwood is good for zones 5-8, if that helps.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I’m zone 6b. It says it will work, but it may get to be too big for our small front yard. I have to find a new tree that is dead out there now. The HOA is going to call it soon! I want a flowering tree out there and one that doesn’t get too big/wide. I just wish I knew what killed the tree. The neighbors say it never took off.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. These are very slow growing, and top out at about 20-25 feet. The one in the pictures has been in the ground for 10-11 years. We have another one in the front, but I’ts more like a bush, after having been damaged in successive years by heavy snow.

          Liked by 1 person

  17. I used to wake up at 5:15 when I used to work at the Microsoft office. I did my chores in 55 minutes and I caught the 6:10 train and I used to be in the office by 7 a.m. I was always a morning person and I was always busy in the morning hours. College, computer course and what not. Now, I don’t wake up before 10:30.

    Like

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