Atypical Pickup Line – #1LinerWeds

On Sunday, when I was walking Maddie, she did what dogs sometimes do while walking. Not the most delightful moment, and one we try to avoid by getting her to do that particular business in the yard before we leave. In accordance with my upbringing, a sense of civic duty and local regulations, I made proper use of the plastic bags in my pocket.

OK? We’re all on the same page now, right?

At the time, we were about three car lengths from a stop sign. As I was finishing my task, a truck pulled away from the stop sign. The driver, lowered his window and offered the following:

“Who’s a good boy? You, sir, picking up that poop, you’re a good boy!”


This post is part of Linda G. Hill’s fun weekly series One-Liner Wednesday. If you have a one-liner, I’d encourage you to join in on the fun. You can follow this link to participate and to see the one-liners from the other participants.

101 thoughts on “Atypical Pickup Line – #1LinerWeds

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  1. As I read this, I put myself in your “position” – stooping and scooping – and imagined the driver stopping to offer his remarks – no doubt meant to be good fun and all… but… I’d be put off by his comments, I think. Huh, go figure.

    As for the fuzzy white cluster of blooms at the end – I have no idea either!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Thanks Dan for my first laugh-out-loud moment of the day – “Maddie’s nemesis now nicknamed Theo” 🤣
    btw – Theo is sitting beside me giving me The Look. You guessed it … he wants breakfast, and he just increased the purr volume.

    Who’s a good boy? You’re a good boy!! 😁

    Liked by 4 people

    1. Maddie was growling, the cat was crouching, and I told her “Theo’s in his own yard.” I just remembered your comment.

      I’m glad you enjoyed this, Joanne. Now, be a good girl and feed that hungry boy.

      Like

  3. HAHAHA. Brilliant line! That driver has no idea just how well trained you are! I used to have a sign at my door that said: “Humans Trained Here”. I too was well trained . . . . Cheryl is going to LOVE those bee shots! I certainly do. Signs of springs . . . signs of hope?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. She really acts like I built that especially for her, GP. She looks annoyed her I put something on it. It’s as if that deck has one purpose and one purpose only. She enjoys “tricking” me into going there. When she was crying at the door, I said, “Ok! I’ll take you out.” My wife said, “that’s not what she wants. See you in a while.”

      Liked by 1 person

  4. LOL, Dan, this is my Wednesday morning laugh. Yup, you’re a good boy for picking up that poo, taking Maddie for walks or out to the deck, letting MiMi sleep (most of the time) , and making sure The Editor and the furry ones are all taken care of in what matters most to them. Good husband, good dad.

    I love seeing your tree sprouts and blooms as we’re beginning to see spring green here. It’s one of my favorite times of the year.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for the virtual pat in the head, Mary. It is looking green and pretty around here. That’s always a good feeling. Maddie talked me into an early walk today. Now she’s probably planning her afternoon sit.

      Take care. Enjoy spring’s arrival.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Spring is springing at your house, and that is a good thing. Also Maddie’s deck is nice and warm from the sun, and I bet she appreciates that as well. But, most of all, thank you for the relay of the potty response. I enjoyed a good laugh out loud but then felt bad because it was at your expense. Hope I’m forgiven. :-) Have a good Wednesday.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. If we can’t laugh at ourselves, Judy, were really in trouble.

      Maddie loved laying on the warm deck on a cool day. I swear this spot was designed just for her.

      We are enjoying the signs of spring. I hope things are getting green for you too. Take care and stay well.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. I love this truck driver! What a great sense of humor and what a fun way to show his appreciation for pooper scooping!! Thanks for the laugh out loud moment. As for Maddie….well, any port in a storm, right?! 🤗

    Your budding trees are already looking beautiful, and the closeup of the bee is fantastic. What that last cluster of blooms is, I have no idea. Maybe Judy, our favorite MG, will enlighten us all!

    Wonderful to see Maddie head straight for “her” deck. Imagine after all that work, if the redhead wanted nothing to do with the deck. Now that would be a bummer!

    How weird is it that Smokey has trouble finding hiding places while Theo has no problem at all. I think poor Maddie is going to be seeing a great deal of Theo from now on. That cat knows she has a captive audience!

    I hope you continue being a “good boy” Dan. Lol.
    🐾Ginger 🐾

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Ginger.

      All that work was supposed to result in a little extra space for my workshop. You should see the look I get when I use it for that purpose 🙂

      Maddie is starting to understand that the cat lives at that house. Barking less, but keeping up with the low grumble.

      I took Good bar song driver’s comments ax intended. We both had a good laugh.

      More green & blooming pictures to come, I love the look.

      Take care and stay safe.

      Like

      1. Good question! That third week in July, we are planning to drive to each child’s house and deliver their year end portfolio, a collection of art, writing, photos, and milestones throughout the year. We’ll probably have balloons and more, too. Of course we’ll do the distancing thing when we arrive at their house. We will also do some fun Zooms of their favorite things. Fingers crossed it all works out!

        Liked by 1 person

  7. I never pick up after Scooter.

    Heck, we live in a rural area where farmer dump billions of tons of pig poop on their fields in the spring and again in the fall. How would you like that for neighbors…..especially on a windy day?

    So no, I don’t scoop.

    But lately Scooter has developed the habit of dumping his load in my neighbor’s driveway?

    Tell me, is this an editorial?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I guess, in the grand scheme of things, what’s a few lumps among billions.

      I get angry with the people who let their dogs on the play fields and then don’t pick up after them. There are signs saying that dogs are not allowed on the fields, and yet these people feel special enough to ignore those. They like to let them run, because the fields are fenced. Of course, the problem is the town will eventually ban dogs from the parks in total.

      As for the message Scooter is sending your neighbor, who’s a good boy, indeed :-)

      Like

  8. Dan–I busted up at that truck driver. What a hoot. My house is across from a nice, quiet city park–the perfect place to walk your dog. I have seen it both ways–those who pick up after the dog and those who just walk on by. As if they don’t know I have my eyes on them!! You are a good boy. Theo….Joanne’s cat is named Theo, so that cracked me up, too. Thanks for the laughs. Gonna be a good day.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Joanne commented earlier that this cat looks like hers, o I borrowed the name.

      The comment was so unexpected, I just had to laugh. I see other’s walking their dogs in the park. If I see them not picking up after them, I’ll offer them a bag – “Oh, did you forget your bag, I have an extra one.” I know that, in the end, they will get people upset enough that the town will ban dogs from being in the park at all.

      Like

  9. ROFL!!! That was fun and I suspect very silly and spontaneous for the truck driver to do.

    I have no idea what the tree is but it’s lovely…like a popcorn tree. Spring is lovely there! Our new tree is full of green leaves! It made it through its first winter in our yard! We’re excited. 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It was silly, Deborah and totally unexpected. It felt good to laugh with another person – a stranger no less.

      Some of those trees were along the canal. You’ll see more of them on Monday.

      I’m really enjoying this spring. In previous years, I was seeing things on Saturdays and missing a lot of the subtle changes. This is fun.

      I’m glad your tree made it.
      Take care.

      Like

  10. Dan the trees are looking positively glorious. Thanks for sharing all the photos with us. Kudos to you for keeping your sense of humor. I was reading all the comments and came to the conclusion that something’s wrong with me. The driver just sounds like a giant d!#&o to me. Just another bully. I would have wanted to throw the bag of poop into the truck with him. I guess I’ve just had to deal with too many snide, condescending, self-important jerks. Like I said, great that you kept a sense of humor. Your day was good. I wouldn’t have managed that. Well done. Hugs on the wing.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You and Maggie both picked up on that. It’s hard to describe in writing about it, but the guys tone was 100% comical. If it had been nasty, I might have tossed the bag toward him.

      The trees are busting out with blooms and color. We are in the best part of spring.

      Hugs.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. The comment was unexpected, but offered in fun, so we both had a good laugh.

      These were the first bees we’ve seen this year. It was good to see them buzzing about.

      Like

  11. omg, Dan, that is my favorite one liner ever!! We do well with this 99% of the time. There was that day a few weeks ago when I only grabbed one bag by mistake and Phoebe used it about 10 minutes into the walk. We were halfway through the walk when Gracie came to an abrupt stop in somebody’s yard — there’s nothing like dog owner shame when you’re walking away from dog poop.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I understand that feeling, Laura. I have gone on walks where I’ve forgotten the bag. I usually carry a couple, because Maddie can surprise you and I’m sure she would do it on a day I only had one bag.

      Like

  12. Its all fun and games until Dan comes back with his nice warm cup of coffee and Maddie says “who’s a good boy ?”. Good story, good pics, good pun. I have no clue on the flower. Mother nature has plenty of tricks up her sleeve. And many of them are ‘have you seen this flower ?’

    Liked by 1 person

  13. I used to get these comments at the beach. I always thanked the person and then asked for a favor. Usually, stunned they would wonder what favor? “Please remind someone who has not picked up poop that they offend you.” A blank stare follows. I move on.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks John. I borrowed the name. Joanne’s cat is named Theo and she said (in a previous post) that this guy looks like hers. I needed to be able to call it something while telling Maddie to shut up. “That’s Theo’s yard, he’s allowed to be there.” Yeah, I have conversations like this – maybe it isn’t Maddie people shy away from.

      Liked by 1 person

  14. Dan, love all the blossoming spring photos, and the pets inside (Maddie & MiMi), and outside (Smokey & Theo). There should be more “good boys” with potty bags in their pockets. We walk our dog’s and dutifully do the pick up. Not everybody does. I miss the east coast spring. CA palm trees & succulents don’t change much season to season. Enjoy your photos and attention to beauty! Happy Wednesday. 📚🎶 Christine

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I am enjoying this spring, Christine. Between being retired and being cooped-up, these walks are a welcome event.

      I love it when we see Smokey. I could do without “Theo” when walking Maddie.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s funny, Janis. I’ve seen people scoot away as if nothing happened. We’ve always picked up after our dogs, and I think most people do. I really don’t understand the people who feel they don’t have to clean up. If nothing else, it’s the law here.

      At least I had a chance to laugh with someone.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. I wish I knew what those flowers were. I thought the driver’s comment was pretty funny. I realize in looking over these comments, how hard it is to convey the way the comment sounded. He clearly meant it as comic relief, To be honest, it felt good to hear something from a stranger and laugh about it.

      Like

  15. That made me laugh, Dan, and I love the photos of spring (looking very different in your part of the country.) What I’ve always wondered is whether it counts if you put the poop in a bag and then never take it along and throw it out? Seems to count for too many poops! BTW, I like the play in your title–atypical as opposed to a typical. :-)

    janet

    Liked by 1 person

  16. LOL. Thanks for the chuckle! And he called you, “sir,” so it sounds like genuine appreciation and gallantry. I believe dogs prefer to do their doggy business away from their own dens whenever possible. Makes life interesting. Great photos – especially the bee!

    Liked by 1 person

  17. You ARE a good boy! As my usual running trail becomes infested with ‘we never go for a walk but it’s the only legitimate excuse to leave the house’ hordes, the poop-dodging has escalated. So, thank you.
    I’m very impressed by your bee photos. Also slightly alarmed by them.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’ll never understand the people who let their dog go and then just walk away. They’re the reasons towns end up closing the parks to pets.

      Those bees seem harmless. They’ve never bothered us.

      Liked by 1 person

  18. Hi Dan – what fun … but it’d put me off the scoop! Essential to clean up. Love the photos … and perhaps you can find out what that tree/bush is … if it’s above please let me know!! I always love the photos of all around you … take care – Hilary

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Hilary. So far, my usual sources of plant identification are drawing a blank on this one. It’s pretty, and it’s wild. It’s growing along the Connecticut River.

      Like

  19. Awesome gallery, Dan. Oh how my heart soared!! As for the “good boy”, who is the master of whom? Maddie has YOU as her servant picking up her poop wherever she decides to lay it. Yep, they sure do have it made, our pets of ours. LOL

    Liked by 1 person

      1. When that happens, it is like winning the lottery. Can’t wait to see it. I hope I don’t miss it. I’m not on WP as much as I usually am. Just so busy with life inc.

        Like

  20. Oh, my, now I’m wondering what was your expression back to the guy? ;-) What did you say back to him? Thanks for sharing all the glimpses of spring flowers and bees – we’re weeks behind those stages. I love how Maddie can curl up in a nice little ball or sprawl as she sees fit!

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Hi Dan, I dislike people who don’t clean up after their dog. Glad you’re not one of them. I will never understand how someone can just walk away from a mess like that and not feel bad. Probably the same person who tosses trash along the freeway. I’m sure you don’t do that either. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  22. Yes, you are such a good boy, Dan! I came home from work one day just as a neighbor was letting her dog poop in my flowerbed at the mail box. And no, she didn’t clean it up, either. She’s lucky that all I gave her was a dirty look! 😂

    Liked by 1 person

  23. Haha! You’re SUCH a good boy! :P
    I do the same thing, although I don’t think the girls do… I let her go in the fallow field, but she is not allowed to do the things in other people’s yards.I think that’s a benefit of leash training.
    Unfortunately, we have been downtown and she just couldn’t make it to the proper area, and I was quite shocked to see her use the sidewalk in such a way. Thank goodness for the bags.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. The worst feeling is when we are halfway into our walk and I realize that I didn’t bring a bag. It’s a rush to get home at that point. We mostly walk in a public park, so clean up is essential, although many people skip that step – ingrates.

      Liked by 1 person

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