Dan Antion

Wings Drinks and a Show – #SoCS

Two limes, artfully balanced.
My coworker seems disinterested.

It’s Saturday and the back door of the bar is unlocked, but there’s no one here to greet us. That’s not a good sign. We are hoping to catch up on our activity for the week while enjoying an adult beverage and testing our wits with Linda G. Hill’s Stream of Consciousness Saturday prompt:

“Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is ‘nail.’ Use it as a noun or a verb. Have fun!”

If we were (about to be) having a beer, you’d be skeptical.

“I don’t like it, Dan.”

“What? The door is unlocked. We don’t need an escort.”

“Let’s just say, I’d feel better if we weren’t entering the door next to the dumpster.”

“The bar’s only twenty feet away. I’m sure Cheryl thought we could find it. I mean, we’ve been doing this for thirteen weeks.”

“Still something doesn’t seem…”

“Welcome gentlemen.”

“…right. Hello Skippy.”

“Hi David, Dan. Cheryl took the day off, but I am ready, willing, and able to serve.”

“But not happy.”

“Excuse me, David?”

“Ready, willing and able, but you don’t seem happy to be here.”

“It’s a job, David. It’s hard to get excited about it. Would you guys like your usual drinks? Corona, Dan.”

“Yes, Brad, leave it in the bottle, please.”

“Dan, you know I hate looking at that label.”

“Yes, David, but Brad has never mastered…”

“…Doing the dishes, Dan? I know, Cheryl washes, dries, and wipes off all the water spots. I just want to kill the virus; I’m not trying to gift wrap it.”

“He makes a good point, Dan.”

“Here’s your beer, with two lime slices. And, David, I believe I have correctly assembled the John Howell special.”

“Let’s see, bourbon, seltzer and ice. Each with a cherry. Nicely done, Skippy. I’ll just put the cherries where they belong.”

“No problem. Let me know if you need anything else.”

“Cheers, David.”

“Cheers, Dan. Did you finish that bookcase?”

“No. I played in the dirt this week.”

“What?”

“We needed to fix some huge ruts around the perimeter of our back yard.”

“Ruts? From what?”

“The dogs.”

“Dogs? You only have one dog and she keeps you on a leash.”

“Maddie is our fourth Irish Setter. The other three, and Maddie when she was a pup, ran the fence line like it was Daytona.”

“So, let them run. What do you care about having a rut around your yard.”

“I don’t care about the yard, but I clear a path with the snow blower, and it got stuck last year; it almost tipped over.”

“So, what did you do?”

“I filled the ruts with three-yards of topsoil and rolled out a pallet of sod.”

“Sod. Instant green, but isn’t that expensive?”

“Yeah, but trying to grow grass with a dog leads to muddy footprints – for – weeks.”

“How many rolls of sod are on a pallet, Dan?”

‘Fifty, David. Fifty rolls of sod.”

“Whoa, fifty rolls of sod? Just to get your lawn level.”

“Yes, Brad. That’s about the size of it.”

“Well, at least Paul Simon would approve.”

“How’s that, Brad?”

“♫ The problem is all around your yard”, as I can see.
♫ The answer is easy if you take it logically
♫ I’d like to help you in your struggle to be green”
♫ But you need fifty rolls ’til your lawn’s level.”

“Hahaha!”

“What’s so funny, David?”

“He got you, Dan. Skippy nailed it.”

“Perhaps, but let’s not encourage him,”

“Oh, why not, Dan. Skippy, can I borrow your pen?”

“Sure, David. You want me to disinfect it?”

“Just give me the pen, and a napkin before this thought flees my mind.”

“Brad, while he’s scribbling, could I have a fresh beer?”

“Sure. That went down fast, Dan.”

“Being the object of ridicule makes me thirsty.”

“Here’s a fresh Corona and a fresh lime balance.”

“Skip…Sorry, Brad, what do you think of this?”

“Ha! I like it. Let’s see what Dan thinks:”

“♫ Just schlep you some dirt Dan
♫ Don’t get yourself hurt man
♫ Just move you some sod Claude
♫ and get yourself green”

“Are you two done?”

“Actually, Dan, I wrote two more verses, but I guess one is enough. Skippy, I didn’t know you could sing.”

“I’ve also done a little acting, David. Did you guys think bartending was my career?”

“Perish the thought.”

“You have to admit, Dan, that was pretty good.”

“It was, but I came here for beer and wings, not the floor show.”

“The beers, and the wings are on me. Is there anything else, Dan?”

“Cheryl, can we have Cheryl back? No offense intended, Brad.”

“No problem.”

I wish that was lumber. I do not enjoy yard work.
It doesn’t look that big, but that’s a lot of dirt.
I don’t know how many of these I filled and moved.
Shovel, schlep, dump, rake, tamp.
At some points along that strip, the topsoil is almost 6″ (15cm) deep.
50 rolls of sod. It was delivered late, but the driver was kind enough to put it in my garage to keep it from baking in the sun.
We’re not trying for a perfect lawn. I’ll put dirt in next to the sod and plant grass in that area,
“The perimeter is looking good, dad.”
I haven’t seen my favorite reflections for a while.
I may have woken MuMu up early.
Baby bunny – sooooo cute!
Sprinkler in a tobacco field on the way to the bar,
Now that’s a sprinkler!
“I thought you were out shoveling dirt.”
“Ugh, another bag of debris. At least my cot is on the other side.”

If you would like to hear the real song,

76 comments

  2. My back hurts just reading this, but the finished project looks really nice. The thing a person who doesn’t do this frequently forgets is that you shoveled that twice – once into the wheel barrel and once out. This is the main reason I have my little truck. I pull that truck up as close as I can get and shovel once at a higher level. I can’t do the driveway any more, but applaud you. You certainly didn’t have to worry about getting exercise for several days. One satisfaction about having that project done is that you’ll enjoy it being complete all year long. Have a good sit with Maddie this weekend – you earned it, and maybe have another beer or two. :-)

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    • Moving dirt is just not fun. I have the leftover dirt in my trailer. It’s going to be used to build up a mound in the corner where we need to plant some arborvitaes as a screen. There is a house with an annoying floodlight that cuts through at an angle and hits our living room window. I will back the trailer as close to that corner as I can.

      Maddie made sure I had a nice rest. She loves prancing around the perimeter on “her new grass” when we go out.

      I will like this most in the winter, when I have to clear that path in the snow.

      Take care, Judy.

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    • Given how long this took, GP, I’m glad I procrastinated. If I had tried to do this while I was working, I would have either had to use some vacation time, or this place would have been a muddy mess. This way, we only had to keep Maddie off the perimeter for two mornings. Not an easy task with a female dog – they have to check the boundary.

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  5. hahaha. I love that song! It can be reused in so many ways, you proved it! Love the reflection picture. “I’ll just slip out the back Jack, and make a new plan Dan.”

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  7. Yep! Maddie is eyeing that perimeter alright. She’s contemplating when that sod takes hold the hours of fun she’s going to have dragging you round and round the yard creating a wider and deeper perimeter rut!! Lol. Using sod was a good idea. No mud baths.

    Doing yard work makes you appreciate the plight of farmers who break their backs working those fields/crops, and always at the mercy of the elements.

    You could have a second career as a song writer! Very clever. Thanks for the real song.

    You and Maddie should enjoy some nice walks and sits this weekend. After all that shoveling, grading and the laying of 50 rolls of sod, you’ll be lucky to have the strength to raise that beer bottle to your lips! 🤗
    🐾Ginger 🐾

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    • Oh, I made sure to put some Voltaren on those beer-lifting muscles, Ginger. Some things are important.

      Maddie has been prancing around on her new carpet of sod for the past few days. She has sniffed every square inch of it and the dirt along the side, and she has “decorated” it in a few places :(

      Even if they have the machines to make the work easier, I think the thing about farming that would drive me crazy is the endless feeling to the work. I kept thinking “three more loads should do it” as I was moving the dirt. Three, three times three, and more.

      It does look like it’s going to be a good weekend. Maddie and I have walked already. I’m sure we will sit later. I might get some work done in between those two critical tasks.

      I hope you have a nice weekend, too.

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  8. Given how long I put off yard work when I was working, I am paying for it now. I am so glad Maddie approved of her new perimeter! David and Skippy got along….baby steps, and I like it! Interesting about the rolls of sod. I have only seen pallets of sod squares before. Backbreaking work, but it makes so much more sense to set out a roll than all those individual squares. Paul Simon (with or without Art Garfunkel) is always welcome. Have a great weekend, Dan.

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    • The rolls a 2′ x 5′ – they cover a lot of ground, but, in an operation like this, there a lot of cutting involved. I rolled out all the full strips that I could, and them chopped some to fill in along the edges and curves. I’ve been saying how this needed to be done for at least three years, Lois. Now it’s (almost) done. I hope you have a great weekend, too.

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  9. That’s a lot of work for one person, Dan. Too bad you couldn’t have hired Skippy as your support team…to hand you a Corona once in a while and sing happy little songs about dirt.

    Or maybe not…

    Anyhow, I hope Maddie approves of the new runway and that you, the Editor and all of the furry children are enjoying this Saturday.

    Liked by 1 person

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    • It was a lot of work, Mary. I ordered the dirt for delivery Monday morning and the sod for Thursday. The dirt came Monday afternoon and the sod came Tuesday afternoon. You only have 24 hours to get the sod down, so my nice-and-easy timeline was replaced by hurry-hurry-hurry.

      The happy dirt song got stuck in my head as I was moving the umpteenth wheelbarrow load.

      I hope your weekend is off to a great start.

      Liked by 1 person

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  10. Dare I say, those two nailed it with the song adaptations and welcome back, Skippy. I remember that song very well. The lawn/yard looks great but man, that’s a LOT of work!! At least you have dirt. Here we have rock and hard pan. Digging (or trying to dig) is a nightmare.

    Our son-in-law likes to put lime in his Mexican beer, too. Only problem is that you can’t recycle a bottle if there’s food in it. Now we have him wondering if he should do it or not. LOL.

    Happy weekend.

    janet

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    • A quick swing-shake will bring the lime wedge close enough to pry out.

      Our soil is mainly sand, so incorporating to topsoil was pretty easy, but gravity is the same all over. It was a lot to move. Skippy gets a weekend slot once a month, or so. He has his fans.

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  16. Excellent job on the sod and dirt, Dan. I can feel your pain even though some other guys did mine. Your sod looks great. What kind is it? I think this father’s day you ought to ask for a new chair to go with that terrific decking.

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  17. One of my favorite songs albums and singers. I could and have listened to Paul Simon all day! Very clever usage of adapted lyrics.😄. But I’m wondering – how long do you think it will be before the ruts appear on new grass? We had a wolf/shepard mix we loved but he would run across our beautiful backyard and huge clumps of grass flew!

    Sent from my iPad

    >

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  20. Man, a bookshelf and leveling out your yard with all that dirt and sod. Dan, you are on FIRE! And now I will be singing “There must be 50 ways…” in my head for the rest of the evening! :)

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  25. I’m so happy you haven’t replaced me in your heart with Skip…uh Brad. Sorry about the lawn work. Hubs feels the same way. Gardening is fun but the necessary lawn work becomes a grind. Maddie does look like a worthy supervisor. Bunny baby…so cute. Hope you enjoy the weekend.

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