I Don’t Miss This—1LinerWeds

I’ve been retired for slightly over a year, and although the year I missed might have seemed like a year of retirement (they’ve been working remotely since April), there are still benefits to being gone. I made a list before I retired of things I wasn’t going to miss. I wanted to wait until enough time had passed, so as not to offend people, but most of the things on the list aren’t personal—except the person who always left their used teabag in the sink strainer—that person can be as offended as they care to be.

This is the time of year that one of the things I really do not miss is taking place, the sale of stuff by coworker’s children. You know what I’m talking about, the sign-up sheet in the kitchen for candy/holiday popcorn/wrapping paper/candles/tea/etc. When our daughter was asked to sell this stuff, we just wrote a check and ignored the request. I wish these people would have just asked for $10 instead of expecting me to buy $20 worth of over-priced bland-brand candy.

“Listen, I don’t care how famous your chocolate is, there is only one peanut butter cup worth eating, and it’s Reese’s.”

This post is part of Linda G. Hill’s fun weekly series One-Liner Wednesday. If you have a one-liner, If you would like to join in on the fun, you can follow this link to participate and to see the one-liners from the other participants.

81 comments

  1. I love your one-liner and the incredible photos, Dan. At my former worksite, employees would bring in Girl Scout cookies to sell. It was serious business for some of these parents. Trouble was — I enjoyed the cookies far too much. 😊

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I am in agreement with you about Reese’s peanut cups, Dan, and love all of your photos this time of Smokey and members of his extended family. I too have been noticing the decreasing number of daylight hours (there is less than a month until the December Solstice.)

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I do not miss the signup sheets, either. If you bought from one, then you were doomed! I did, however, find myself missing the Christmas wrapping paper my grandson’s school sold for years. It was the best!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m glad it was good stuff, because “grandson” means you’re buying it anyway :-)

      The last few years I was working the trend had gone to giant containers of popcorn, fancy chocolates from a local candy maker and holiday wreaths and decorations. It was hard to find things for under $20 on some of the lists.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Had to chuckle about the sales this time of year. Isn’t retirement wonderful. Your not-missing list remind me of what I a colleague told me – “You’ll miss teaching, but you won’t miss all the baggage that goes with it.” :) Especially loved the two pics through the trees.

    Reminder: Our collaboration goes up Saturday. I would appreciate if you could mention it and a link in the intro of your Saturday Stream of Consciousness post. Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Some jobs make you carry more baggage than others. My brother was a teacher. I’m not sure I could do it. I mentored kids in a college program, and I did a few guest appearances for technical subjects, but day-to-day? I don’t think so.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. I worked for Hershey Canada for a year or two. I was introduced to chocolate I had never had. The BP cups were one. After EXTENSIVE research I have concluded: You are right. And now I want one . . .two . . .ummmmm! Love the single leaf picture best.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I didn’t have to worry too much about co-workers selling things. It was never anything I felt guilty about either buying or refusing. My enemy in the office was sugary treats to be avoided on a fairly regular basis over which I rarely had willpower. Cookies, donuts, cake, Hershey’s dark chocolate nuggets with almonds. I honestly tried to eat healthy and stay away from it all, but it was difficult. Working at home finally put an end to that and instead of gaining weight, I actually lost some. There’s much I do not miss at the workplace (mostly work), but I’m a little sad about not being the elf who puts up a Christmas tree every year.

    Have a wonderful and safe Thanksgiving holiday, Dan. Enjoy the meal, peanut butter cups and family.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I was the guy with the candy bowls with the dark Hershey’s nuggets – sorry. I also had mini-kit-kats, you might have had a few of those in honor of your mom. After one year of retirement, I’m in a slightly lower 5-pound range. I still snack, but not during the day.

      You are right about one thing, what I don’t miss at all is the work.

      I hope you also have a Happy Thanksgiving, Mary. Wish us luck tomorrow night, if the game isn’t postponed due to covid.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. One of my co-workers kept the Hershey nuggets stocked – she said for me – but I never told her not to. She knew I loved the chocolate.

        Much luck on the game. I didn’t realize the Steelers were playing, but I know they will do well. As for that other team, I am still bummed about Sunday. They have not been themselves of late.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. I may not get to see the game. The Ravens have a couple players out with Covid so the NFL has moved the game to Sunday. Unless they do a Sunday night double header, it’s unlikely I’ll see the game up here :(

          I was sorry about that loss on Sunday. We play the Colts pretty soon.

          Like

  7. I hear you on the Reese’s, Dan! LOL As for your gallery ….. my soul is sighing. THANK YOU. I haven’t picked up my cameras in almost a month …. between my personal life and the bombs going off in the world I haven’t been motivated. But!! YOU motivated me today! I’m also sad that those glorious colors are gone … hence another reason why I haven’t touched my cameras. Now the real deal comes as a photographer …. finding beauty in the bare. You did. So will I!! In the meantime, more Autumn pictures are coming from me! Happy Thanksgiving to you and your family, Dan!!! ENJOY! xo

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I have an advantage, Amy. 50 pounds of crazy redhead dragging me through the park and stopping to investigate all the weird and interesting smells. Although, it’s chilly today, and we walked without stopping long enough for me to take a glove off and wake the camera up. Just a quick brisk walk.

      I hope you have a wonderful holiday!

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Hi Dan – congratulations on having had an effective year in retirement. Those sale things sound awful – the terrible thing is I really do not like peanut butter with sweet things … not good – so my PBCs are all available! Enjoy the Thanksgiving dinner with Faith … and the walk with Maddie and making sure Mimu is awake for the day. All the best and take care – Hilary

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Hilary. When our daughter was in school, the fundraisers were just part of moving money between families. I bought your stuff and you bought mine. I was on a the board of a parent’s association and I lobbied for just giving money. We could easily raise enough money to meet our goal, without having to sell a bunch of crummy candy and useless items. That idea was quickly shot down.

      We will enjoy the day. Take care.

      Like

  9. REESE’S RULES!! OMG, now I want them for breakfast. Great one-liner.

    The squirrels certainly have found the perfect peanut restaurant to dine at. I agree, none of them look like they’re starving. Too bad we can’t say that about so many humans.

    I love the winter sunset photo and the lone frosted leaf.

    Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours Dan and to all your readers who celebrate the holiday.
    Ginger

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Ginger, I’m sure my readers join me in wishing you the same.

      I did see one of the squirrels burying a peanut yesterday. That’s always a good sign. We’ll try to keep the outdoor dining open through the winter, but I’m not adding heat for these buggers.

      Like

  10. Has it seriously been a year already!? Wow. I know what you mean. Hubs always wanted to just give the school their money and not harass people. But the kids got so pumped up at school when they were young-they offer prizes for most sales-it was heartbreaking to explain the truth about the product to the little ones. I do have a gem of a tale for you though. For a time we lived with hubs’ mother in Galveston. My second was about 8 then. She had an uber snooty neighbor who didn’t like kids, animals or most humans. My son was tasked with selling (my favorite back then) World’s Finest chocolate. Gotta love those almonds. Anyway, he was determined to do it and so we allowed him to walk the street and go door to door. Imagine our surprise when ‘dragon princess’ bought a box! 😱Later she told my mother-in-law she just couldn’t resist his enthusiastic, “Hi! I’m selling the world’d FINEST chocolate! Would you like to buy a box?” And the smile, there was that smile. 😉Happy Turkey Day, Dan. I hope your team wins now that the only player I care about is sidelined. 😩

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Cheryl. Thanks for adding that story. It doesn’t surprise me that your son’s smile could crack the stonewall. I’ve see pictures of your grandchildren and they could sell me anything. I’d buy a good candy bar from anyone, but most of the stuff being sold in our kitchen was “non-traditional” a.k.a. weird.

      Enjoy the day!

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  11. Oh Dan, I hear you about the candy thing. What I had to deal with was sanctioned by the top of the agency. They made several demands for donations a week, for about a third of the year. It was like ransom — “Donate a percent of your pay to one of the charities on our list or be ostracized!” My (anyone’s) employer (private or government) should not get to influence my charitable contributions in any way. Period.
    Then they also wanted me to be the one to collect the money! That was the last straw. I finally researched, and found an archaic, little known religion that had been around for at least a hundred years, which had beliefs that were similar enough to how I felt about those contributions. I started saying this is my religion and you’re asking me to violate those principles. It was unpopular for me to say it, but they couldn’t argue with it, any more than they could better known religious minorities. Rather than give money or collect it as demanded, I offered to “use my skills” to help, and specified what skills I could use. Sorry about the long comment… Delete it if it bothers you in any way at all. But that is one thing I will never miss about my job.
    Smokey is looking great. LOL, and yes I noticed that other squirrel is doing quite well! :)
    Wishing you and yours a wonderful Thanksgiving. Hugs on turkey wings!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Oh, Teagan–I can relate. Where I worked, they would send out an email stating the only made 98% of their goal for insert fundraiser here and they wish everyone would participate. But it was not mandatory. Talk about passive-aggressive!!!

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Lois, I told my exec boss that “It’s fundamentally wrong.” The execs didn’t like it any better than the general staff, but they had more funds to “comfortably” contribute to the agency’s list as well as the ones they chose… but I felt for them too, just because of the pressure. The emails — they’re barely short of outright threats… Hugs to you and yours.

        Liked by 2 people

    2. I’m fine with your comment, Teagan. I got into a big argument about “having” to give to the United Way. I discovered that I could give to them but specify any 501-(c)(3) charity, so I gave, but I designated the local AIIM Chapter as the recipient. The UW kept 10% for handling, and only paid the remainder out 90 days after the quarter in which they had collected it had ended but they did give them the money eventually. I hope you enjoy the holiday – stay safe!

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Oh, United Way…that was a big one for us, too, Dan. Many disgruntled comments about this organization, yet they had representatives come by our office to show us a film and share our Thanksgiving luncheon. Whew. Good thing we are retired. :D

        Liked by 1 person

        1. They were mad that I didn’t participate in the UW drive last year. It was a week before I retired, and I wasn’t going to let them connect with me through personal email or follow me into retirement.

          Liked by 1 person

  12. I always hated the person who would take all but the last few ounces of coffee and then put the pot back on the burner to fry. There is a special place in selfish hell for that one. Super post, Dan. All your creatures look like they have been to the store for winter coats. These shots look like winter is heading your way for sure.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Since I was almost always the first guy in the office, John, I had to clean those pots from the day before. I started bringing my own coffee from Dunkin Donuts so I could avoid that. I don’t like the K-Cups coffee, but I was glad when the brewing system was installed. I still used my own K-Cups, but at least I didn’t have to worry about cleaning a coffee pot. I know a few people who will be in that place with that guy.

      The critters around here seem ready for winter. They are adding leaves to their nests and their coats are filling out. It’s 40°f (4°c) today, but it feels a lot colder. One of those days the wind goes straight to the bone.

      Liked by 1 person

  13. So much not to miss about work…I love retirement. Funny/creepy story: Our admin secretary kept a dish of candy corn with a little serving spoon on her desk. Pre-Covid–could you imagine doing that now??!! Anyway, we got into work one morning and she buzzes me: “Come to my desk right now!!” I go there and we stand there with our mouths dropped open. Someone had bitten the top off of each candy corn and put the rest back in the bowl. All we could figure was the cleaning people at night. Needless to say, the corn was dumped, never to reappear again. Fond memories…..

    Liked by 1 person

  14. I’d do exactly as you – I gave them the funds and did not take the candy. It was a way to limit the intake of sugar for one, but really, it was a protest against false advertising. Calling yourself “world’s finest” does NOT make it so!

    I love the light this time of year – if and when the sun shines, it is much further south in the sky and the views are different.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I do enjoy the sunlight in winter. Our shadows are off to the side of the path as we walk. The advertising around the fundraisers is horrible, and the pressure they exert on the organizations that sign-up is enormous. I really try to avoid them if I can.

      Liked by 1 person

  15. I wish these people would have just asked for $10 instead of expecting me to buy $20 worth of over-priced bland-brand candy.

    Except for Girl Scout Cookies, especially the thin mints.

    But why do they always start selling them on the day after you resolve to “lose a few winter pounds”?

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Oh, those trees and leaves! Oh, that sun and that frost! And, as always, the critters. Doesn’t seem like there were many ball games this year. Do birds have COVID restrictions, too? I don’t miss those school sales, either, except for World’s Finest. I’ve been known to pull the car over, jump out, and chase a child who’s selling that down the street yelling, “TAKE MY MONEY!” #NotReally #YesReally

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hahaha – I’m picturing you tackling little Johnny.

      File this under ‘unforeseen consequences’ – without real ballgames, the turf isn’t torn up, there aren’t sunflower seeds spilled all over the field and the grounds crew doesn’t have to worry about spraying pesticides. So, very little on the fields for the birds to eat. We really are all in this together.

      Liked by 1 person

  17. That leaf casts a big shadow. The frosty one isn’t so bad either. We still have not had a killing frost here. Though the shorter days and cooler temps have done a good job of putting most of the plants to sleep. According to the forecast the storm for Monday will bring the frost here. Missing work not. Have a happy Thanksgiving.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Ugh – AGREED. We rarely let our kids do the fundraisers. They did one through church for a mission trip and my in laws just gave them a check to donate to the church. That way the kids got 100% of the funds and they didn’t have to order useless wrapping paper.

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Hard to believe that you’ve been retired for a year. Time flies, huh? I never bought anything like that in my office, except maybe Girl Scout cookies now and then. But, I had a no Girl Scout, no cookie policy… the girl herself had to come by and take my money. They were always so dang cute and I wanted them to work for the sale, not rely on Mom or Dad. I guess I’m ornery that way :)

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Yes! The used teabag in the sink. What is wrong with people? I’ll add a pet peeve of mine from my office: people who leave empty sweetener packets on the counter. Even if the trash wasn’t TWO FEET AWAY, there is no excuse for that.

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Seems like only yesterday you wrote about your pending retirement. Certainly does not seem like over a year already. This gives me hope that my time is approaching faster than it feels. C’mon 2024 :)

    We did the same as you and gave “donations” instead of selling. Enough to reach whatever minimum was needed for Pony and Lulu to get the prize of a pizza lunch or whatever they gave as an incentive to sell MORE. I haven’t had to deal with this at work since the company policy changed some years back. Selling at work for school fundraisers, church raffles, … or anything actually is prohibited. I have to get my Girl Scout cookie fix from the booths outside the grocery store.

    Liked by 1 person

  22. Hi Dan

    Oh my goodness do I recall the fundraisers – and agree with you on writing a check rather than pushing sales for sub par and over priced crappy items

    And on Halloween our neighbors invited us to stop by for their Halloween rad party – outdoors and Covid safe – when we found out it was for Girl Scouts – I asked her if they were selling stuff.
    No, she said – and Dan – it was a surprise / they really just had a bunch of adult and kids (and okay / it was a sugar party with cupcakes / candy and soda – oh my!) but no fund raising and I was surprised and delighted

    Liked by 1 person

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