Dan Antion

Anything Else? – #1LinerWeds #JusJoJan

Last week, I had a bowl of clam chowder at the restaurant whose bar I like to visit. Their chowder is excellent and there’s something about hot soup on a cold day that makes everything better. When I was finished, the bartender took the empty bowl away and quipped, “I see you hated it.”

We had a good laugh, but it reminded me of a funny waiter about 30 years ago.

A coworker and I had suffered through a miserable meeting one morning. We decided to have lunch at a restaurant on the lower level of our building. This restaurant ran a daily special and one of the entrees that day was roast beef, twice baked potatoes and gravy. If ever you needed something after a horrible morning meeting, it’s something with gravy.

We ate, we drank, and we laughed. The roast beef special was wonderful, and the gravy was so good that I mopped it up with those potatoes after I had finished the meat. The waiter came up to our table, and in a manner reminiscent of the best snooty butler you can remember from the movies, addressed us with,

“Can I get anyone anything else, another drink, some dessert, a squeegee?”

He was looking at me as he finished.

This post is part of Linda G. Hill’s fun weekly series One-Liner Wednesday. And, given the time of the year, it is also part of Just-Jot-January. If you have a one-liner, I encourage you to join in on the fun. You can follow this link to participate and to see the one-liners from the other participants.

She wears this vest on windy days. Maddie would go out regardless, but Setters don’t get a winter coat, so we have to help her.
Our shadows are moving more toward the west.
Something fascinating must have been here.
I like how the rays seem to reach out across the pine cones.
Sunrise through the honeysuckle.
We keep finding these in the park and parking lot.
We’re still walking as the sun is rising.
I don’t know what is is about this lady, but Maddie tries to bark her out of town.
A little bit of suburban wilderness.
The sun is hanging around a bit longer these days.
Hi Smokey.
Smokey is going to eat this one now. He’ll bury the next one.
I think she wants to be left alone.

69 comments

    • It’s always my pleasure if I can bring a smile or a chuckle, Judy. Maddie loves her coats. This one fits looser than the buffalo plaid, but it does a good job of breaking the wind. The best part is, when she sees it, she knows she’s going for a walk.

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  3. I never understand snarky waiters who make fun of clean plates. Do they want you to leave food that they’ll have to waste and throw out? Smokey knows better, you don’t see him wasting nuts.

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  7. Hi Dan – it’s lunchtime here … I could do with a bowl of chowder – love it. A plate of roast beef with all the extra deliciousness … also too good. I hadn’t realised Setters don’t have a winter coat as such … I’m glad you look after Maddie then. Yes – the sun is slowly creeping up … Squeegee for rain here … stay safe – Hilary

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    • Thanks Hilary. Yes, Setters don’t have an undercoat, just hair. They (dog people) say the good thing about that is that they don’t shed. They don’t shed their winter coat, but that lose hair all over the place. I hope you have a nice lunch.

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  8. A good waiter will make a mediocre restaurant one you want to visit again. On the other hand, lousy service can ruin a great restaurant. I once had a waiter cover my drink with plastic that I couldn’t see. So when I went to take a drink it was blocked. We all had a good laugh and the waiter got a great tip! It’s always a great way to wake up in the morning to see wonderful pictures. Thanks Dan.

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    • It’s important to be able to laugh, Pam. Waiters and waitresses are so important to a restaurant’s success (I wish they were paid better). At least that drink didn’t end up in your lap 😏

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  9. Your one-liner still has me laughing! This waiter not only had a great sense of humor, he definitely knew how to ensure a hefty tip!

    Lucky for you that you left MiMi alone. Just look at her front paws. She’s praying that you leave her alone. Lol.

    Glad Maddie has her toasty warm vest on. She’s going to need it for the next several days. Love the shot of her with her feathers glowing and the sun making her look like she’s being blessed from Heaven. It won’t be long before green leaves will block the sunlight from filtering through those trees.

    Happy Wednesday Dan.
    Ginger

    Think positive. Test negative.

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    • We did have a good laugh, Ginger, and I’ve repeated that line many times over the years. I am still one who will mop up a good gravy.

      We’ve certainly been noticing the sunny days more this winter than in the past. Last year, I was reluctant to walk here on weekdays, due to all the kids waiting for school buses. This year, we’ve got the timing down pretty well.

      MiMi likes to play, but much later in the day. Her big mouth sister has been waking us up at 2:00, 3:00 am because she wants to be brushed or petted. I feel like I should be able to pet them whenever I like, but…

      Have a great rest of the week, Ginger.

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  10. And you squeegee-ed a post out of that long gone gravy. It goes well with the long shadows of sunrise. If I were not such a night owl I might see them some time soon. Ha ! Perhaps not until those flowers lure me out. Thanks Dan.

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  14. About the lady. Cur tip hair, blue coat. Definitely barkable. I love the gravy story. I used to live in a small town in Indiana. Since it was corporate headquarters, we got our share of snooty advertising types. I took a few out to lunch at my favorite lunch spot. To give you an idea, the waiter’s name was Bruiser. One of the NYC types asked for a to-go container for his soup. Bruiser walked over with a brown bag, popped it open, and dumped the bowl into the bag. The soup oozed out over the table, and it was all I could do not to pee my pants. I thought the ad guy was going to have a heart attack.

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  15. I love that a snooty butler-type offered you a squeegee! I would have busted up! If I didn’t know better, I’d say that walker lady is sitting on Mount Maddie. My cats claws are out in a united front, Maddie. No worries…

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  16. Clam chowder!!! Oh, that sounds so good! I’m not a huge gravy fan, although my husband is, but roast beef gravy is delish. I think I’d have been tempted to either stick my tongue out at him, lick that plate while staring into his eyes, or, mostly likely, said something to the effect of “No, you’re just too late.”

    janet

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  24. Even as a vegetarian, I understand the concept of not wasting good food. Someone worked hard to make that gravy! One of my pet peeves is when wait staff takes my plate before I’m finished. Good thing it doesn’t happen very often.

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