Sometimes the Bear… – #1LinerWeds

I tend to be verbose when sharing the backstory to my one-liner. That’s because I fear that the point will be missed if not wrapped in context. However, today I think I can move right along. There are some things that everyone understands. One of those things is dealing with insurance companies.

Recently, I found myself in a protracted argument with one of these institutions. This company has no problem reaching to our checking account and taking their premium, but when I needed information, they gave me a week’s long runaround and then put me in a queue to have the information I requested mailed to me “within 10 business days.”

I was relating this story, with more detail, names and dates included, to my buddy at the bar. He worked for an insurance company before retiring and he reminded me that I did, too. His comment to me was:

“It’s like wrestling a bear, you know you’re going to lose, it’s just a question of how bloody you want to be when you eventually give up.”

This post is part of Linda G. Hill’s fun weekly series One-Liner Wednesday. If you would like to join in on the fun, you can follow this link to participate and to see the one-liners from the other participants.

71 comments

  1. Hi Dan – sometimes it’s just not worth the effort, is it – but on occasions we need information … I just swallow hard and know it’s going to be a long process and remind myself not to fuss too much. Wonderful photos MiMi and MuMu and Maddie – lucky critters … I failed to see Smokey: all too grey of varying shades. All the best with that snow and cold. Hilary

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Don’t get me started on insurance companies. When we lived down south we paid homeowners religiously for 20 years. One hurricane and half a roof later? They dropped us and deemed us a bad risk. WTH? And yes, we’re fully coated in ice right now. I haven’t even been outside yet.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hey, we didn’t go into this business to pay claims. At least that’s what I think they say in the back rooms while they’re counting your money.

      We got off easy on this storm, more rain than ice, but enough ice to make its presence known.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. How did you know we had to do that yesterday morning? You have to endure speaking to the drone and having a topic outside its box of words that you want to give up before even getting to a human. Once you get past the drone, how many people will you be transferred to in order to get something very simple taken care of that you’ve already called twice about. It really is rediculous – you call, they acknowledge the issue and tell you they have it fixed only to start the process again the next month. Dealing with an insurance company definitely requires a beer and a sit with Maddie. :-)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Exactly! I’m sorry that you had to go through this, Judy. I went down the road twice. Once for the person who clearly did NOT understand and sent me the wrong thing, and again to get the right thing…in 10 business days. I said, “the information I need is on a computer screen. Why can’t someone take a screen shot and email it to me?”

      “That’s not how the process works, sir.”

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I haven’t had to deal with an insurance company in awhile, but there are plenty of other companies I’ve tussled with over trying to get simple information. The latest was the SSA concerning taxes. After waiting on hold three times for extended periods, I finally called a local tax accountant who answered my questions within 10 minutes. I could have saved a lot of blood by calling her first.

    Give your furry kids some skritches from me and have an awesome Wednesday, Dan.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Mary. Unless they’ve wired it into one of their websites or Tetris-like phone systems, getting information is a difficult process. I’m pretty sure every time their customer surveys indicate people are comfortable with the amount of time they had to wait, they lay somebody off.

      All fur bellies and heads have been rubbed, scritched, scratched and brushed as required. Time for more coffee.

      Stay warm!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. The weather sure got drastic this year and it’s still going. Sorry you have to deal with an insurance company – I hate calls like that, no regard for how long we’re on hold or how many different departments we get transferred to!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I was expecting to wait on hold. I even managed not to get angry at how long I had to wait on hold. But when they told me “someone will have to prepare a letter and mail that information to you.” I lost it. I wasn’t asking for a legal opinion. I needed an official statement regarding three basic facts about the policy. Anyone in the company could have looked it up on a laptop and sent me a screen shot. When they can take your premium payment in a fraction of a second, it takes nerve to claim that they need 10 days to answer a simple question.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Don’cha just love it when you have to call an insurance company twice with the same question? Exact same company. Exact same question. Different Customer Service Rep. Two TOTALLY different answers! 😳

    MiMi and MuMu have their lifestyle routines down pat. You go girls! Maddie may not always know enough to get in out of the cold, but once she’s in she has her routine down to perfection! Good girl Maddie.

    I think that gray ‘lump’ on tree trunk is Smokey…..directly across from window on the right.

    I LOVE the pic of the retreating ice that you liken to the shoreline. That’s exactly what I saw when I first looked at it!! Haha!

    The ice wasn’t as bad here as predicted…but bad enough. Not sure what we’re in for tomorrow with snow accumulation. Forecast keeps changing.

    Hope you and the Editor and the three M’s stay warm, dry and safe.
    Ginger

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Ginger. Thanks for playing “can you find Smokey,” but sorry. He’s almost dead center in this picture. Straight up along the line of the corner of my shop.

      MiMi and MuMu have their lifestyles figured out, along with our servant roles in those lifestyles. Poor Maddie was drenched to the bone (so was I). She had to take care of business, but the sound of the rain/ice was distracting her every time she tried. By the time we got inside, both her towels were soaked trying to dry her off. My coat hung for hours.

      That’s the kind of ice Maddie likes to step on. She seems to like breaking it loose. We didn’t get much ice. I’m not sure what we’ll get for snow. Different sources say different things, but it looks like I’ll be clearing the place again.

      As for our friends in the world of insurance, they can frustrate you with the best of them. Mine was such a simple request. It took over a month to finally get the answer in a form I could use. Meanwhile, the debited my premium right on time.

      Take care. Stay safe and warm.

      Like

  7. I love that one-liner! Tell your buddy he’s brilliant! Love the pictures, too. Lots of critters, a beautiful clear sky, and macro shots. I really DID think that was a shoreline for a couple of seconds. You’re da bomb!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I take it you’ve wrestled the bear a few times… Unfortunately, sometimes there’s no other option. I have to get in the ring with these guys every January, and it’s always the same battle and I always lose.

      I’m glad you enjoyed the pictures.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Is skating counter clockwise really easier on the heart? I had no idea. I was watching a cooking video yesterday and was fixated on the fact that she was stirring the batter the wrong way–counter clockwise!
    Words that pierce my heart: auto-withdrawal. Once they have your money, you are at their mercy. They ought to call it exactly what it is: ransom money.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha – yes, ransom. I recall my poor brother trying to get people to stop withdrawing money from out mother’s account after she died. Couldn’t close that account fast enough.

      Yes, counter clockwise is better. Your heart is on the left, and it pumps blood from left to right. The centrifugal force helps the heart as opposed to making it work harder. Things like stirring the batter are weird when they don’t do it the right way ;-)

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I probably should have know that about the counter clockwise thing–that’s how we always ran around the track. That made me think about my chemo port. I read that they are mostly implanted on the R side. Mine is on the L. Weird, right?

        Liked by 1 person

        1. I wanted to tell you what a great job you did with the boards on that porch. It was almost an optical illusion that I saw only one plane until I looked closer. Funny how the eye is tricked.

          Liked by 1 person

          1. It was actually a problem for us. My wife has issue with depth-perception (she’s blind in one eye) and we tried a bunch of things to see what would help her not see the steps as one plane. The direction of the “grain” changes with each board, including the ones that drop down to the next level. Coming up, it’s not too bad, but going down, especially in low light, it can be scary.

            Liked by 1 person

  9. Our menu options have recently changed so please pay attention. Don’t worry when you finally get to somebody we won’t. It would be helpful if you restrict your answers to the FAQ. And do please use our keywords. If you have a question that requires thought we used to have someone that knew the answers and could deliver them with a bit of grace and kind helpfulness. But the VP of customer satisfaction decided that if your required answer was not covered in the FAQ it was an inefficient use of company resources. Have a nice day.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You’ve got that down pretty good, John. I do think you could have a side-business recording for them. The entire time I was waiting on hold, after realizing that they had no pat answer for me, they kept repeating the mantra – “for faster service, press four now for menu of self-serve options.”

      Liked by 1 person

  10. That’s a great quote. I’ll have to try to remember it. Thankfully, I don’t have to make that call to the insurance company very often!

    I think I spotted Smokey but am not sure. Is he on the woodpile behind the trailer? It looks there might be a bushy tail on top of it.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I only have to make that call in January, Deborah, but it frustrates me that I have to spend half the morning on hold to get the most trivial bit of information. Why they can’t put it on their website is a mystery to me.

      I had to open the picture and check, because that wood pile behind the trailer is one of his favorite spots. He’s not there. He’s almost dead center in the picture. Straight up along the line of the corner of my shop. He’s pretty hard to find. The little bugger blends in too well.

      Liked by 1 person

  11. I love going back and forth with them only to be told “That information is on our website.” If I could find it on your website, why would I call you? Then it turns out it’s in some obscurely-titled download that doesn’t seen to have anything to do with why you called…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I searched their website, John and I even did the “chat” thing, which is probably a robot algorithm of sorts, all to no avail. “Yes, it’s on the website, but we don’t no where…”

      They explained that this particular (trivial) bit of information “has to be sent from a licensed agent by US Mail.” I asked if the agent could just take a picture of it and send it as an email – no! I asked if I could pay to have it sent FedEx (since the mail is sketchy at best these days) – no! If I could speak to the agent, he/she wold probably understand how trivial this request is, but of course, you can’t speak to them.

      Liked by 1 person

  12. I like the one-liner but am sorry for the story that brought it to mind. My thought at seeing the title was “Sometimes you get the bear; sometimes the bear gets you.” Or that old joke that if a bear’s after us, I don’t have to outrun the bear. I just have to outrun you.” :-) Both of those may or may not apply here but they’re true. My favorite is from an Eric Carmen song: “Sometimes you get a hula hoop, sometimes you get an Edsal.” Cheers! Stay warm!

    janet, feeling slightly guilty at how nice it is and wishing I could share, especially with my friends in Texas and that area

    Like

  13. It’s so true with many institutions. They collect not one minute late or they charge late fee, but they take forever to reimburse or refund. I’m happy with Amazon so far as far as their return and refund policy. As soon as the returned item scanned, it’s refund to me.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. I smirked at your one-liner. And I include: medical insurances as well, which caused me to urge my new clients – please pay out of pocket, I make it worth your while, and you don’t have to wait half a year before their permission finally arrives. Because by that time you already have finished therapy:) It seemed 90% wanted a bloodless war:)

    Liked by 1 person

  15. I feel like Mimi will have a long, languid life. As for the other, that stuff boils my blood. Every job I ever held was customer oriented and it became a special talent of mine to appease, console and complete the processes necessary to help those customers. Customer service has died in the US. 😞

    Liked by 1 person

  16. We probably pay a little bit more (note to self: check into our current pricing) but we have our homeowners, umbrella, and auto insurance with the same company and they have a local office not too far away. If I need anything, I just drive over and park myself in a chair in someone’s cubicle. I’m pretty sure I’d be able to get a screen shot… given to me with a smile. I hope you didn’t get too bloodied, or at least got a few blows at the bear.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Well, the bear knew how I felt, but he was only guarding the cave, not really his fault. I agree with your philosophy. We have all key accounts with local institutions. This was health insurance – no real local option.

      Liked by 1 person

  17. MiMi <3 I love the way she’s positioning her paws.
    Lovely skies!
    Now you’ve piqued my curiosity and I’m all, I WILL HELP YOU WIN, lol! Breech of contract? Need help reading the policy? lol I hope it all gets sorted and you’re not bloodied one bit!

    Liked by 1 person

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