It’s been an unusually quiet week around here but some of us still feel like relaxing. So, let’s get over to the bar (I’m running late), order something to quench our thirst and see what we can do with Linda G. Hill’s Stream of Consciousness Saturday prompt:”
“Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is ‘the last thing you emptied.’ Think of the last thing you emptied or something you empty often and use it as your prompt any way you like. Have fun!”
If we were having a beer, I’d be late, and you’d be starting without me.
“Cheryl, since I’m paying today, you can start working on a John Howell’s Special for me. I don’t know where Dan is.”
“I’ll get started, David, but he still has a minute. That is, if you guys still meet at three o’clock.”
“We do, but he’s usually early. He got me started coming early and now I feel that to be on time is to be late.”
“Here’s your bourbon, and your snifter of seltzer. I’ll be right back with the ice and cherries. Also, I see Dan coming from the door up top.”
“It’s good to see you, Dan. Where’ve you been?”
“Sorry I’m, what, forty-five seconds late, David. I had to stop at the grocery store.”
“Why?”
“We ran out of grated cheese.”
“That’s more important than cold beer on a Saturday afternoon?”
“No, of course not. I didn’t think it would take as long as it did.”
“Why didn’t you scoot through the self-checkout?”
“Sorry to interrupt this scintillating conversation guys, but Dan, can I get you a cold beer?”
“You can, Cheryl. If you still have Modelo on tap, I’ll have a draft. As to your question David, Big-Y doesn’t have self-checkouts, yet.”
“Yet? What does that mean?”
“They are adding them, but so far, they’ve only torn out the live-person-checkouts, so the lines are backed up to the meat department.”
“Here you go, Dan. Personally, I prefer a human-powered checkout.”
“I do, too, Cheryl, but if the store does self-checkout right, I don’t mind.”
“How do you define ‘doing it right,’ Dan?”
“Like Target and Home Depot, David.”
“What makes them different?”
“They let you leave large or heavy items in your cart. They even give you a scanning gun to use.”
“I take it your other market makes you put everything in the bagging area.”
“Yes, which is a scale. That way they know that you’re not stealing something or swapping items. I could, conceivably put the kitty litter in my cart and toss a ten-pound ham on the bagging table.”
“Don’t they have an attendant watching you?”
“They do, and I’m sure she would notice the old switcheroo if I tried it.”
“Still, as long as the bagging area is big enough, I guess it’s not too bad.”
“It is too bad, David. If I go to a human being, I can hold up one bag of kitty litter and say, ‘I have two of these.’ She rings up both, and I only have to move one bag onto and off of the counter. This way, I have to scan both, move both the bagging area and then later, move both back into my cart.”
“You guys ready for another round?”
“We are, Cheryl, and maybe a pizza. Peperoni and mushrooms OK with you, Dan?”
“Sounds delicious.”
“The part I hate about self-checkout stations is the fact that when you’re putting all your stuff in the bagging area, it’s like playing Jenga in reverse. I mean the bagging areas is less than half the size of a grocery cart, and it doesn’t have sides.”
“You’re right, David. And then, after you pay, it starts snapping at you to remove your items from the bagging area.”
“Exactly! I got in trouble last week because it kept saying that and I finally yelled, ‘Give me a minute!’ Well, I got in trouble because I added something for emphasis.”
“Haha – David, I’m surprised at you. Just for that, this bourbon is on the house. Dan, here’s your beer. Your pizza will be up soon.”
“Well, that worked out, David. You got yelled at by the checkout police but got a free glass of bourbon.”
“If I had known that would happen, Dan, I would have yelled earlier.”
“OK, boys. Here’s your pizza. Need anything with that? Extra napkins, hot pepper, grated cheese?”
“Hot peppers and napkins, Cheryl. Dan brought his own cheese.”
Coming Attraction: Next week, Author and friend Bradley Lewis will join David, me and Skippy. Brad is a fan of Skippy, although we don’t know why. I hope you can join us. It should be fun
All five of my current books are now available in audio book form thanks to Amazon KDP’s Virtual Voice process. The voice is AI generated, but I can honestly say, it’s pretty darn good. The audio books are reasonably priced (all below $7 US) and, if you already own the Kindle version and want to add an audio version, you can do that for $1.99. There is a five-minute sample on the book page for each book. If you’re interested, click on any of the Dreamer’s Alliance book links below the image or on the link below for my latest book.
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