The books in my Dreamer’s Alliance Series include a fair amount of snark and sarcasm between family members and a bit of inappropriately timed humor. This post, and one of the doors you will see tomorrow are evidence that I come by this skill (if you can call it that) honestly.

Yesterday afternoon, we were expecting some severe thunderstorms. Before those storms moved in, I decided to make sure the birdbaths were all full. That usually requires a 5-gallon bucket of water. When I started out to fill the bucket, I noticed one of the bunnies munching in front of the water faucet. No problem. I told the bunny that I’d go to the faucet out front.

There’s a hose attached to the faucet in the front. Although the nozzle is normally in the off position, it wasn’t yesterday. I turned on the water and it sprayed all over my left leg.

Not my best move

Whenever hose and sprinkler accidents would happen when I was growing up, my dad would laugh and say:

“Looks like an inside job.”

This post is part of Linda G. Hill’s fun weekly series One-Liner Wednesday. If you have a one-liner, and would like to join in on the fun, you can follow this link to participate and to see the one-liners from the other participants. Although I’m writing this Tuesday night, I think you should check out Linda’s post today for some good news.

All five of my current books are now available in audio book form thanks to Amazon KDP’s Virtual Voice process. The voice is AI generated, but I can honestly say, it’s pretty darn good. The audio books are reasonably priced (all below $7 US) and, if you already own the Kindle version and want to add an audio version, you can do that for $1.99. There is a five-minute sample on the book page for each book. If you’re interested, click on any of the Dreamer’s Alliance book links below the image or on the link below for my latest book.

Bridge to Nowhere

74 responses to “Family Tradition – 1LinerWeds”

  1. Dan, this is such a warm and lovely post. That apple photo unexpectedly put an old song in my head. It was really popular when I was small. A nice end to my day. Hugs.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. I remember “Little Green Apples”! It was great to hear it again.

      Liked by 2 people

    2. Thanks Teagan. And thanks for sharing that song. I remember the song, but I haven’t heard it in a long time, and I’m not sure I ever heard this duet.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. So many people “covered” it that I’m not sure which version is the one the radio station in my small town played (the days of payola). Englebert & Roger Miller seem like an unlikely duet. LOL.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. I think Roger Miller had a variety show on TV. Englebert was probably a guest. If he was, my mother watched that episode – she loved EH.

          Liked by 1 person

    3. Oh this was delightful! I hadn’t see or heard these guys in decades! Just look how young they were then! Thanks for sharing this, Teagan.

      Liked by 2 people

  2. That made me smile …lovely post had to smile at your dad’s saying ….great photos as well the first one the wet apple is stunning 🤭💜

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Willow. When he would joke about something, we knew we weren’t in trouble. I think he understood that getting wet was part of having fun.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. It certainly is isn’t it 💜💜

        Liked by 1 person

  3. I too grew up with numerous snarky comments.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. He taught us that you could laugh at (almost) anything. He crossed the line a few times, but…

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Your dad must be a humorous guy, Dan. One question: when thunderstorm come, it would rain, right? Why do you need to fill the birdbath? :-)

    Liked by 2 people

    1. He was, Miriam. Dad could laugh off most anything. As to your question, I left that paragraph out, but since you asked… Sometimes, the storms have lots of lightening and thunder, but very little rain. Also, before the storms come, the critters are all out eating (their forecast always seems better than ours). IT turns out, I could have skipped filling yesterday. We got over 1/2″ of rain.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I see. Now I got the picture, Dan! I remember the thunder and lightening in California. Sound and light travel, so when they happen, the rain clouds may not be near.
        I hope you got just enough rain but not too much.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. We’ve had so much rain in July, Miriam. It’s been crazy. We have more this month than the previous six months combined.

          Liked by 1 person

          1. Wow, it would cause flooding in California after all the wildfires. As you know, it rains a lot in Portland during the winter season. But mostly it’s patchy rain.

            Liked by 1 person

            1. It has caused flooding here. Ours has been mild, but they have had severe flooding in Vermont and New Hampshire.

              Liked by 1 person

            2. I heard it from bloggers about Vermont and New Hampshire. There’s no quick fix for the weather.

              Liked by 1 person

  5. My dad had those kinds of sayings as well. Love it. Your Rose of Sharon looks a lot like our hibiscus. Great photos.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I think they are in the same family. I couldn’t tell you what the difference is, if there is any. Those little bits of humor had a way of diffusing a situation. If he joked about it, I knew things would be fine.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I agree, Dad’s sense of humour got us through some tough times.

        Liked by 1 person

  6. My Australian mother had one, “Too late she cried, as she waved her wooden leg.” Abbreviated by Mum to “Too late…” It is an old Australianism referring to the lady who didn’t look first before crossing the train tracks. Australians have an odd sense of humor.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Oh, Sherry–that is so funny. I think the first time I’d hear this I would have to wait to see if anyone was laughing. Odd sense of humor…but I love it!

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Glad you got a kick out of it. I love it too.

        Liked by 2 people

    2. That’s funny, Sherry. Better an odd sense of humor than no sense of humor.

      Liked by 1 person

  7. I get wet more times than I don’t using a hose because usually there is a tiny drip somewhere and I look down and realize my pants are wet so I understand. You have lots of color in your area, and that is a really good thing.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I usually get wet from having the water splash off of something, but yeah, using a hose often ends this way. The frequent rain is keeping everything out there in good health.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. waves hello to bunny
    Your blooms are lovely. I adore rose of Sharon, but unfortunately so do the woodchucks.
    🥴

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Wow. Now I’m glad we don’t have those cute little buggers. The bunnies will eat the lower sprouts and branches. We’re careful not to prune the lower portions, especially in the fall. They will nibble up pretty high when standing on the snow.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Our woodchucks strip everything down to the stalk before it has time to grow. I can’t get anything established…

        Liked by 1 person

        1. We had to put fences around the two new Burning Bushes we bought last year. I was surprised they came back. We decided that we can’t ever buy a 1-gallon plant. It’s the perfect bunny size.

          Liked by 1 person

          1. Same here. It’s maddening. Not to mention expensive….

            Liked by 1 person

  9. Murphy’s Law Avatar
    Murphy’s Law

    I love your dad’s one-liner! I’ve had that same experience with the hose more times than I want to admit. Enough said!

    Your bunnies are having a field day, aren’t they? I laughed out loud at the Robin. Those guys take the most vigorous baths of any bird I’ve seen, and they come out looking towel dried. I want to hand them a brush to smooth down their feathers!

    A cactus and spiders! Two nightmares in one!

    Despite the incessant rains and high temperatures, your plants are looking mighty spiffy.

    Old Glory always takes a good picture.
    Ginger

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’d come in worried about getting yelled at, Ginger. He’d make a joke and everything was fine. He never took life too seriously.

      The bunnies are very happy this summer (and making more and more bunnies). I swear, the robin makes more of a mess than five black birds. The blackbirds all get in and get wet. The robin likes the whole bath to himself, and empties half the water. I don’t think anyone is going to bother that spider.

      Things around here, including that flag, have weathered this summer’s rain fairly well.

      I hope you’re having a nice week.

      Like

  10. These are all such great portraits of summer! And snark is a good thing in all seasons. It sounds as though a lot of us had snarky parents. They prepared us for the real world, I think. You want sympathy? You get snark. Thanks for the chuckle!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. We had to really be having a bad time to get sympathy from our dad. He was the king of “laugh it off and move on.” I think it did prepare us well for the real world.

      Liked by 1 person

  11. You developed your sense of humor from your dad just as I did.
    I have noticed an abundance of mushrooms in my yard this year too.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yep. My mother tried to get us to understand that humor wasn’t always appropriate, but even she had to laugh at some of the things he would say. Mushrooms are everywhere. This week was supposed to be dry, but we had over 1/2″ of rain in that thunderstorm last night.

      Liked by 1 person

  12. Dad humor is timeless. Nice action shot of a robin after his bath!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. They could diffuse almost any situation with a quick laugh. As Ginger said, I think I was supposed to bring that robin a towel.

      Like

  13. I love your Dad’s one-liner!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Liz. He was always ready with one. Some can be printed ;-)

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You’re welcome, Dan. :D

        Liked by 1 person

  14. Your dad sounds wonderful, Dan. He should know his one-liners live on and are enjoyed by many.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. He was, Lois. We still laugh at some of these. Some need to be shared privately, but we still laugh.

      Liked by 1 person

  15. Well done, Dan. This made me smile.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Jennie. I’m glad to hear that.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. You’re welcome, Dan.

        Liked by 1 person

  16. I like the comment from your father. It’s evidence where the good humor came from.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Frank. He taught us not to worry about the small stuff.

      Liked by 1 person

  17. Your Dad was a true philosopher Dan. What a treasure. It’s not a perfect day without critters is it? I ‘d love to have a flower named after me, you know like the Fuchsia of Cheryl. 😂😂That Rose of Sharon is so lovely. And shrooms too! I used to get up early and walk the neighborhood in Louisiana just to catch mushroom photos before the sun melted them. There can be entire little villages.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m usually out before 7:30, earlier during horrible heat waves. If the sun can wilt the mushrooms, I don’t want to be walking in it. If I ever discover a new flower, I’ll give it a Cheryl name.

      Liked by 1 person

  18. Hi Dan – yes … the laissez-faire attitude lives on – a great lesson to have in life. These things happen – so often when one is in a rush … but equally when one doesn’t want to upset Dad. Love the pics … ‘the weather’ … it’s having its moments this year – enjoy the rest of the summer – cheers Hilary

    Liked by 1 person

    1. When he could joke with us, Hilary, we knew he wasn’t upset. Our weather is putting on quite the show this year. Looks like yours is too.

      Liked by 1 person

  19. LOL! I usually let the water run out of the hose after shutting the water off, but I too have been caught out with water in the line still. Hopefully, it was a little refreshing.

    Oh, I laughed out loud when I saw your Robin all wet and messy fresh from its bath.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. We do drain the hose. We usually also shut the nozzle off, but I hadn’t. It was refreshing, but I was changing clothes.

      Liked by 1 person

  20. Whenever I see spider webs in the grass, it kinda grosses me out, but I never mind seeing giant webs in the usual places. We used to go in our backyard at night and shine the flashlight over the grass. It was freaky seeing thousands of “eyes in the grass” looking back at us!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You see the webs, but hardly ever see the spiders. That means they’re nearby ;-)

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Yes, and I don’t want to disturb them, so I avoid walking near them. I don’t hate spiders, but I get freaked out if I walk into a web!

        Liked by 1 person

  21. Thanks for the chuckle—and the photos, Dan!

    Liked by 1 person

  22. I grew up in a household that loved humor also. I don’t think I really appreciated how lucky I was until I got older and realized that not everyone did. If we can’t make gentle fun of ourselves or others, what a sad life it would be.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I, too, didn’t realize until I was older that not everyone grew up in a family that loved humor. I am happy to have humor in my life.

      Like

  23. First picture of the Apple with the sun shining through the water drop is exquisite! I too have soaked myself with the hose. Unfortunately my water ended up in my face.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Pam. I love looking at those apples whe they have water drops. I was lucky this hit my leg.

      Liked by 1 person

  24. Very clever quip attributed to your Dad. Yep, I’d fill the birdbath from a different faucet too to let the bunny munch away and ponder life without disturbing him/her..

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s pretty easy to be nice to the animals. I think they appreciate it.

      Liked by 1 person

  25. Slow Joe Crow – love it! Any of those mushrooms edible? I hope you and yours are spared the heat.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I don’t know if the mushrooms are edible. I’m also not tempted to find out. We have been switching between hot (90s) and humid and thunderstorms this week. They say it will be cooler next week.

      Like

  26. Hi Dan, being sprayed by water is fine during the summer time but when this happens during the winter, I’m not so happy about it.

    Like

  27. Your photo skills just get better and better. You’re amazing!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Marian. I hope you’re getting better. I saw the nails on IG – they look good.

      Like

Add your thoughts or join the discussion. One relevant link is OK, more require moderation.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Trending