It’s a sunny Saturday in the middle of a rainy week. David and I should be doing lots of things, but holding to the spirit of Saturday. This requires a visit to the bar, a cool libation and arm-wrestling with Linda G. Hill’s imagination for the Just Jot it January Prompt and the Stream of Consciousness Saturday prompt:
“Your prompt for #JusJoJan the 27th and Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: ‘make the call.’ Use it as an idiom or use it literally. Have fun!”
Linda G. Hill
If we were having a beer, you’d be asking for a big favor.
“Hello my friend. How are you today?”
“I’m fine, David. What’s with the overly formal greeting?”
“Whatever do you mean?”
“Okay, now I get it. What do you want from me?”
“Not much. I just want you to make a phone call and pretend to be me.”
“Who am I calling?”
“HP.”
“HP, the computer company?”
“No, HP the car dealer. Of course, HP the computer company.”
“Why can’t you call them?”
“I don’t know what’s wrong with my laptop. You know about this stuff.”
“I know some things, but I haven’t done tech-support in years.”
“Didn’t you used to work for KPMG as a consultant?”
“Yes…”
“Cheryl, John Howell’s Bourbon Special, STAT!”
“What’s the rush David?”
“Mr. Yes-and-no is about to strike.”
“Dan?”
“I didn’t say it. And I wasn’t going to. I could, it’s true, but I know he hates it.”
“What were you going to say?”
“I worked for the firms currently known as KPMG, but that was over thirty years ago.”
“What, is that some inverse Prince thing?”
“You could say that, David. I worked for Peat Marwick Mitchell & Co.”
“Co? Like company?”
“No. Co like Co-partners, and the first part of cold beer. If I’m going to make the call, you’re buying beer and all the Teagan’s mushrooms I can eat.”
“See, I knew you were a consultant.”
“Don’t go there. I’m not sure you could afford the rates they charged in nineteen eighty-five, let alone today’s rates.”
“Okay. But, what did you mean firms, plural? How many firms?”
“I started working with Peat Marwick Mitchell, but they changed their name to Peat Marwick.”
They dropped Mitchell?”
“Yep, like Sears stopped Roebuck.”
“And Chrysler dropped Plymouth.”
“And Simon dropped Garfunkel. Here’s your bourbon and Dan’s beer.”
“Thanks Cheryl. Maybe someone should open Mitchell, Roebuck, Plymouth and Garfunkel.”
“They could sell donuts, cuz Dunkin’ Donut’s dropped ‘Donuts’ from their name.”
“That’s true, Dan. And they could merge with Johnson.”
“Which Johnson, David?”
“Both. Johnson and Johnson is now Kenvue for non-pharmaceutical brands.”
“You guys drink bourbon and beer, but I’m glad Stolichnaya Voda changed to ‘Stoli.’ Stolichnaya was a lot to say.”
“Maybe John Howell will shorten his bourbon to Howell’s.”
“Or, maybe, Willett, since – you know – that’s the actual brand.”
“John Howell’s is better, Dan. Willett sounds like a bird. Oooh, look, a ruby throated willet. Who wants to drink that? If the people at Willett were smart, they’d buy the John Howell’s name.”
“Um, I think that’s his real name.”
“He’d probably license the rights to them for the right amount of money.”
“It might confuse his readers. Names are very important to authors.”
“Speaking of names, Dan. Hewlett-Packard Company, or HPC, or HP is waiting for you to make that call.”
“I can’t do that without your laptop, David.”
“It’s right here in this bag.”
“OK, let’s turn it on and see what’s going on.”
“That’s the problem, Dan. It doesn’t turn on.”
“Seems to be working. Can you try logging in.”
“I swear, it never got this far before.”
“Did you try unplugging it and letting it sit for twenty seconds?”
“No. Why should I do that?”
“Because it’s magic. Still want me to make the call?”
“Cheryl, can we get another round and some mushrooms for Mr. Fixit.”
“I think that’s Mr. Fixit and Co., David.”
All five of my current books are now available in audio book form thanks to Amazon KDP’s Virtual Voice process. The voice is AI generated, but I can honestly say, it’s pretty darn good. The audio books are reasonably priced (all below $7 US) and, if you already own the Kindle version and want to add an audio version, you can do that for $1.99. There is a five-minute sample on the book page for each book. If you’re interested, click on any of the Dreamer’s Alliance book links below the image or on the link below for my latest book.
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