It’s the first Saturday in March, and we have our first visitor of the year. As regular readers know, it’s hard to create these posts when we have guests. Still, I managed to sneak the Stream of Consciousness Saturday prompt into one of Marian’s answers. That’s cheating, but I still wanted to participate:
Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “clump.” Use it as a noun or a verb. Have fun!
Linda G. Hill
If we were having a beer.
“Hello Dan. I assume we are waiting for our guest before we start drinking.”
“I think that would be polite, David, I mean, unless she’s late.”
“Who are you guys waiting for?”
“Marian Allen is joining us today, Skippy.”
“Oh, I remember her. She was here when you threw hat shindig with Lulu.”
“Yes, well, about Lulu…oh wait. I see a black Nissan Versa pulling in the lower lot. Is that her, Dan?”
“I do believe that’s the Gothmobile.”
“Hello, Marian. Welcome to the bar. I’d like to introduce you to David.”
“It’s nice to meet you. Can I get you a drink?”
“It’s nice to meet you, David. I’ll have some Four Roses whiskey and a beer chaser.”
“Oh, here’s Skippy now. Did you get that order.”
“I did, and if I remember correctly, that beer would be Dragon’s Milk Imperial Stout.”
“You have a good memory, Skippy. How’s Lulu?”
“She’s fine Ms. Allen, I’m sure. I’m guessing you guys want the usual, right?”
“Yes. A Jon Howell’s Special for David, and I’ll have a Modelo draft.”
“Dan, how does he remember her beer preference from two years ago but screw up my order every week.”
“I’m going with Marian Magic. Anyway, we’re not here to talk about Skippy. We have one of the most prolific and accomplished writers I know sitting with us. I think we should turn our attention to her.”
“Agreed, Dan. And if I may go first. Marian, I love your short stories, and I am amazed that you can crank them out for Story a Day in May. How on earth do you do that?”
“As my daughter Sara used to say when she was little, I just make them up to my head. I do a kind of free association thing: I start with a prompt, then let my brain go off onto tangents and grab the one that I like the best.”
“Speaking of what you like the best, my favorite stories are the Steffie stories, and I am honored that you have written them for the Thursday Doors Writing Challenge.”
“Steffie’s a good choice for your favorite, Dan. I also love the Holly Jahangiri stories. What can you tell us about these two, Marian?”
“Well, David, Steffie was meant to be a one-off, but she proved so popular, she had to become a fixture. There is a real Holly Jahangiri. I met her in an online class about setting up a successful blog, called Blogging Boot Camp run by Danni Greer. I had written a crazy, slapstick science fiction farce that started life as a Star Trek: TOS parody…”
“T O S? I’m sorry, I’m not the fan of Star Trek that Dan is.”
“Here is your whiskey and Dragon’s Milk, Ms. Allen. Dan, here’s your Modelo. David, here’s your complicated setup and T O S stands for ‘The Original Series’—You know, the one with Kirk and Spock.”
“Thank Skippy. Sorry to interrupt. Marian, please continue.”
“I decided to garner interest for that parody by going on a blog tour for it and offering to put the names of anybody who commented on one of those posts into a hat and naming a character in a short story set in the farce’s world after the winner.”
“So, Holly won the contest?”
“No, Dan. Holly didn’t win, but she commented on EVERY blog tour post, so I also used her name. Somehow, she turned out to be the main character—indeed, the heroine.”
“Characters do have a way of surprising us. The idea behind the Holly Jahangiri stories is fascinating. A living library where people are the books. If there were such a place, and you were to end up there, can you think of a book you’d like to be?”
“Well, Piranesi by Susannah Clarke is my very most favorite book in the world, so probably that one.”
“In a comment on one of Dan’s recent blog posts, you mentioned that you had completed the taxes for Per Bastet Publications. I’ve always wanted to ask about that, what can you tell us about Per Bastet? How did that get started?”
“An extremely nice bookseller set up a publishing house run out of his bookstore and quite a few people submitted books and were published by him. It proved to be more work-and-money-intense than he had realized, and that press folded. The ‘orphaned’ authors took their books elsewhere or looked into self-publishing. Three of us orphans formed a small press, which also fell apart. Two of those three plus a different third tried again, with legal help to make sure we had all our ducks in a row, and that’s Per Bastet Publications.”
“That’s an interesting start. How did you come up with that name and what is your role—beyond doing the taxes?”
“The name of the press belonged to T. Lee Harris, the heart and brains of the operation. She does the formatting, interior design, and cover design. She does most of the cover art, too, PLUS SHE WRITES! I’m the Evil Editor, in charge of acquisitions and marking up manuscripts. My #1 Daughter, the amazing Sara Marian, is technically in charge of publicity, but she’s in grad school to advance in her career as an archeologist, so she’s kind of on leave of absence.”
“Sara also has a blog. I visit there occasionally. I love the beginning of her bio which says: ‘I was raised in the woods by wild English teachers, and have been writing for as long as I can remember.’ I assume you are among the clan of Wild English Teachers. Would you care to elaborate?”
“Well, Dan, Charlie and I were both English teachers, although I only taught for a few months. I was terrible at keeping discipline. I could do it now, easily, but I couldn’t then. Preschool Sara used to stand at my side and dictate stories to me. So, yes, she’s been writing for as long as she could talk!”
“Let’s talk about some of your books. I have read A Dead Guy at the Summerhouse, and although it’s no great claim to fame, Lonnie, Me and the Hound of Hell is the first book I purchased for my Kindle reader. What have I missed?”
“As you know, Dan, Dead Guy is a paranormal (or is it?) mystery. Imagine my face when I was told that, being set in 1968, it’s historical…. Lonnie is a set of stories featuring the biggest fool in the world and his best friend. Sideshow in the Center Ring is what I call a comedy of bad manners; it’s science fiction, but the real story is the interaction of people (human and non-human), with a main character who is a better person than she thinks she is. Other Earth, Other Stars is a collection of science fiction short stories, some of which feature characters from my novels. Bar Sinister is a comic mystery, the first of a series set in a neighborhood of Storybook Style houses.”
“I hate to interrupt, but would anyone like another round?”
“I think that’s a good idea, Skippy.”
“You also have a trilogy, Marian…correct?”
“Yes, my SAGE trilogy—The Fall of Onagros, Bargain With Fate, and Silver and Iron—and Shifty, the collection of short stories set in the same world, are fantasy set in a matriarchal society in which morally ambiguous divine animals (Unicorn, Phoenix, Dragon, and Tortoise) need the choices of the people they meet in order to effect change. Finally (dear God, isn’t that enough?) The Wolves of Port Novo is what I call “science fantasy”, because there are mermaids, but they’re natural beings; it’s set in an alternate Earth of a time more Anglo-Saxon than Middle Ages, and deals with bigotry, courage, difficult choices, and sacrifice.”
“That’s an impressive list, Marian. I’m embarrassed to admit that, unlike Dan, I haven’t read any of your books. However, I’d like to start. Flipping through my phone on your Amazon author page, isn’t helping me choose. In addition to those books, you have collections of short stories and poems. If I want to get to know Marian Allen, where should I start? Or does it not matter?”
“I’m glad to hear that you want to start, David. My husband thought The Wolves of Port Novo was my best, so I’d suggest that one.”
“Marian, you follow a pattern on your blog, nail art (which I need to ask about) on Monday’s and food on Tuesdays. Those food blog entries always look so good. I feel like we should have you walk back into the kitchen and tell the chef to throw together a bunch of stuff. I know you have a book that includes stories and recipes. Can you tell us about that book or this subject in general?”
“I’ve done several books with stories and recipes, Dan. I like to read, and I like to eat, so I guess that’s what’s up with that. One of my Spadena Street (the Storybook Style neighborhood) books will include really REALLY quick and easy dishes, because that’s what the main character cooks.”
“Marian, I don’t blog, but I follow Dan’s blog, including Thursday Doors. I have to say, I think you’ve shared more medical doors than anyone. Are you done with doctors for a while? Is there anything you learned about yourself or others or medicine in general, you’d like to share?”
“David, I learned I have the best girls in the world. I was pretty sure that was the case, but they really made my escapades bearable.”
“I thought it was extremely generous of you to share your experiences while dealing with breast cancer. I hope your posts have helped some people have a better understanding of the subject/process.”
“Was there a question there, Dan?”
“No, David. Not exactly. But maybe Marian can respond anyway.”
“Giving a better understanding was my purpose in sharing what were some pretty icky details. There’s a lot of stuff the official literature doesn’t tell you. I wanted to share my experiences so people might know they aren’t alone, they don’t have to be apprehensive of what the next bit is going to be like, and MomGoth’s got their back.”
“Dan alluded to this, but I have to ask. When did you become interested in Nail Art? The process you go through to create your nails each week seems challenging, but I enjoy reading and seeing the results.”
“I started painting my nails, David, when I started selling Per Bastet’s books at conventions. I thought maybe having fancy nails would lead people to look at a title if I pointed at it. (Most people don’t notice.) Maniology nail art company offered a free nail stamping kit and I am all about free, so that got me started.”
“I’m gonna switch gears here, and David, I’m going to get geeky. Marian, you are the only person I know who uses Linux and who is alive. I did know one other person, but sadly, he is no longer with us. What on earth is it about Linux that you like? I’m sorry if that sounded like my opinion is negative—I’m a forever supporter of Windows, since the death of OS/2.”
“Dan, I hate Windows with the heat of a thousand suns. I’ve been mad ever since GUI (Graphical User Interface, aka purty pitchers) replaced the command line. My new laptop came loaded with Windows Eleven, and it was so intrusive and naggy and bossy it drove me NUTZ. Then I heard they were talking about making the OS a subscription model, and I downloaded Zorin Linux and installed it. The software is free, and if something doesn’t work you can ask other users and usually fix it with a couple of command line inputs. BOOM!”
“I get that, but…”
“Enough, Dan. One geeky topic is enough. Move on.”
“This looks like a good time to interrupt; does anyone want something to eat?”
“That’s a good idea, Skippy. Marian, what would you like?”
“A Beyond Burger hamburger with a clump of fresh lettuce and spicy whole grain mustard, and a side of fries. Can you do that, Skippy?”
“We can, for sure. You guys want to join her?”
“Yes, on the burger part, but let’s not go beyond the steers.”
“Gotcha. You normally get our house special, right?”
“Skippy, are you taking supplements? Your memory is impressive today.”
“I’ve been practicing memorizing stuff, David. It helps with my acting.”
“Before the food gets here, can you tell us a little about those adorable cats—Tipper, Chickie and Adi?”
“Tipper and Adi are sucker cats: People who had them extorted me to take them by saying they’d have to go to the shelter if I didn’t. Tipper is all white, but he had a black stripe on his head when I first got him and it grew out. He’s about six. Chickie is five, and she was Charlie’s cat. He rescued a tiny black and white kitten from the tool shed. When she died, we were devastated, especially Charlie. Our #1 Daughter had feral cats under her porch giving birth, and they were black and white. When they were weaned, Charlie picked one out and that was Chickie. They were devoted to each other. It took her a while to accept me as her person after he passed. Adi is four. She’s a calico long-haired, regular-eared Scottish Fold. She’s pretty quiet, but every now and then she wanders through the house meowing because she wants to know where I am. Day. Or. Night. Tipper and Chickie did NOT like Adi joining the household! They still hiss or growl at her sometimes, but it’s more out of habit than hatred. The three of them take turns blogging for me on Caturday.”
“Before Dan sidetracked us into nerdland, I was going to ask if you’re working on anything now”
“I’m polishing that first book that inspired the Holly stories, David, Force of Habit, and adding a Holly cameo at the end, since she wasn’t in the book originally. I’m also reading the proof for a collection called Frenemies in Space, set in the world of Sideshow in the Center Ring.”
Folks, if you didn’t pick up on it during the conversation or in my introduction, Marian, has a wonderful library to choose from. She covers a lot of genres, has some of the most interesting characters on Earth (and beyond) and, if you get hungry along the way, she’ll offer a simple recipe for a delightful meal you can slap together. Please check out her blog, and her author page.
All five of my current books are now available in audio book form thanks to Amazon KDP’s Virtual Voice process. The voice is AI generated, but I can honestly say, it’s pretty darn good. The audio books are reasonably priced (all below $7 US) and, if you already own the Kindle version and want to add an audio version, you can do that for $1.99. There is a five-minute sample on the book page for each book. If you’re interested, click on any of the Dreamer’s Alliance book links below the image or on the link below for my latest book.
No Facilities 
Add your thoughts or join the discussion. One relevant link is OK, more require moderation.