Happy Saturday, and happy first day above freezing in two weeks. David and I are at the bar. The cold weather has had him in a funk, and I’m hoping a blast of warm air will cheer him up. If not the air, maybe the alcohol will. If I have to, I’ll add some food. While we’re here, we’ll give Linda’s prompt a go.
Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “in person.” Use it any way you’d like. Have fun!
If we were having a beer, you’d be down in the dumps.
“Good afternoon, Dan. A Modelo draft?”
“Yes please, Curley. Any sign of David yet?”
“I haven’t seen him. He’s usually here before you.”
“I know. He hasn’t been himself lately. I think it’s the cold. I’m gonna try to cheer him up when he gets here.”
“Here’s your beer. I’m not sure that’s a good idea, Dan.”
“Why not?”
“Well, no offense, but your plans have a way of going sideways.”
“Here he comes, now. Remember, go easy, at least until he has some bourbon in him.”
“Hi Dan.”
“Why it’s David! Live and in person. David, to know him is to love him.”
“Curley, how much has he had to drink?”
“Don’t mind him, David. He’s trying to cheer you up. I am too, but I thought I’d use a glass of John Howell’s Bourbon, a snifter of seltzer and a glass of ice.”
“That has a much better chance of working than whatever my young friend has in mind.”
“Your young friend is paying for the bourbon.”
“That’s welcome news, Dan. But you should know, I’m the kind of guy who doesn’t like to be cheered up.”
“That’s a bad approach to life, David.”
“And that’s a bad approach by someone who’s trying to cheer a person up, Dan.”
“OK, but there must be something going on that makes you smile.”
“Nope, nothing. It’s cold. It’s been cold for weeks. There’s ice everywhere, including ice dams in several parts of my gutters.”
“It’s starting to get warmer as we speak. By the time we’re done here, it could be as high as thirty-seven degrees.”
“In other words, as high as five degrees above freezing for maybe two hours, then it’s back into the twenties overnight. So anything that melts will refreeze. It will be like someone ran a Zamboni across my yard.”
“So what? Your driveway is clear. Your car sits in a garage. You don’t go into your yard…do you?”
“My wife feeds the birds. I worry about her falling.”
“You could feed the birds for her.”
“What, so I could fall. She’s prepared. She wears those spiky things on her boots.”
“Then there’s no reason to worry.”
“I guess. But I’m still cold.”
“Curley, besides another round of bourbon, what do you have to warm this guy up?”
“The cook made a batch of sausage and pepper soup. That’s guaranteed to start a fire in your belly.”
“That sounds great. Two bowls of soup, and follow that with two orders of Teagan’s mushrooms.”
“I’ll put those in. The soup will be up right away.”
“So, David. What sports are you following now that football is over.”
“College basketball, Dan, but my guys aren’t helping my mood.”
“They’re going to make the tournament, right?”
“Sure, but this was the year they were supposed to three-peat.”
“Yeah, well, so was Kansas City. Set your sights a little lower and just enjoy the game.”
“Is that what you do, Dan?”
“David, I’m a Pirates fan, of course that’s what I do.”
“I don’t want to talk about sports. My basketball team gives me heartburn, baseball hasn’t really started, and I don’t like hockey or professional basketball.”
“What about auto racing. The Daytona Five Hundred was last week.”
“I tried watching that. I don’t have the patience.”
“What about Drag Racing? That starts next week. You only need four seconds worth of patience to watch that.”
“Four seconds?”
“Yep, zero to over three hundred miles an hour in less than four seconds.”
“Maybe I’ll tune that in. But I don’t know any racers.”
“That’s perfect. If you don’t know, you don’t care who wins. That means you can’t be disappointed.”
“Here’s your soup, guys. The mushrooms will be up by the time you’re done, and I’ll pour you another round.”
“Thanks Curley.”
“This soup is good, Dan. Thanks for trying to cheer me up, and for not being a jerk about it.”
“A jerk? What the heck, David.”
“Yeah, well you know how you are. You can be hard to take when I’m in a bad mood. I think you try too hard, but I know you mean well.”
“Here’s your bourbon, David. I gave him that same advice earlier.”
“Good job, Curley. Maybe it helped. Dan, make sure you leave Curley a nice tip.”
All five of my current books are now available in audio book form thanks to Amazon KDP’s Virtual Voice process. The voice is AI generated, but I can honestly say, it’s pretty darn good. The audio books are reasonably priced (all below $7 US) and, if you already own the Kindle version and want to add an audio version, you can do that for $1.99. There is a five-minute sample on the book page for each book. If you’re interested, click on any of the Dreamer’s Alliance book links below the image or on the link below for my latest book.
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